Wedding

I woke up, my alarm went off at 8 am. I looked at the time, it was morning 8:00 am, I remember being awake till 5 am, did I even get some sleep? I don't know. Everything feels so surreal, is this even real or just a bad dream? I can't believe it's my big day, my wedding day. I want to turn back time and want to run away to somewhere far away. The sunlight hitting my face, I can't feel it anymore. They say the big day is your happiest day, but I feel this is going to be my saddest day ever in my life, 'happiness' doesn't belong in my dictionary anymore. I heard knocks, I got down from my bed and went to open the door. I saw mum standing there, she hugged me all of a sudden, it …..felt...warm? why so?

"Good morning, Erica, my daughter" she broke the hug and smiled at me.

I smiled at her too, she looked happy. Am I going to say anything? No, not anymore. "Freshen up, you need to get ready too. They will be arriving soon." I nodded and smiled at her, she left me there and went downstairs.

I went to take a shower, it was the most relaxing thing, I didn't even realize for how long I was inside. I came out and looked at the time and it was already 09:45 am. I dried my wet hair, I was still wearing a sweatshirt and shorts.

Suddenly I heard someone walked up inside my room, I was almost scared. I looked at the person and it was Yoona, thankfully my hair dried up. She was smiling when she came inside and locked up the door; as soon as I kept my hair dryer on my table, she ran and hugged me tightly. A hug, the thing which I needed the most ever since, I left his arms. I hugged her back, I don't even want to leave her, "Erica" she called up my name, I was holding back my tears, I can't cry like this, early morning. Yoona came yesterday, but I refused to meet her, I just couldn't hold the overwhelming feeling yesterday, I just cried off yesterday, all day long.

"Yo-Yoona" my voice broke, she pulled back from the hug, she looked at me with her softest eyes, "Erica, why are you crying? Don't cry. Just smile today, you deserve to be happy." She was cupping my face, and I just nodded. I wiped up all the tears and smiled at her. "Good" and she smiled back.

"We need to reach the venue by 12 pm, so get ready Erica Hwang and I brought your wedding dress so get changed." I nodded and took the dress from her; I went to change into it. I changed it, and came to look at the mirror. When I looked at myself, I almost couldn't recognize myself is it because I look very different or did my dream dress change everything? I always wanted to wear this dress ever since I saw this dress in that shop. I never thought I would be actually wearing this dress but someone else would be my fiancé and I would get married to someone else, I never imagined it. Till now I always imagined myself with Choi Seungcheol and everything with him, what am I supposed to do now. I left him and here I am ruining myself, I can't even do anything myself.

"You are the prettiest bride I've ever seen in my life. I mean it." Yoona's words sounded so sincere and pure, I wish he was here. Yoona made me sit in front of my dressing table, she wanted to do my makeup, I always wanted her to do that, and I will do at her wedding, that was something we always wanted to do with each other.

I trusted her more than myself, after half an hour, I felt she was done, my eyes were still closed. "Open your eyes my girl" when I looked at the mirror, I was taken aback, I looked different, I looked beautiful. Yoona held my shoulders and both of us looked at the mirror, "do you like it?" I nodded, I wonder how Seungcheol would've reacted if he saw me like this, walking down the aisle. I can never find an answer to that. Thinking about him, makes me feel guilty, sad, and it starts hurting.

"You ain't crying right now Erica, I can't let you ruin my handwork, don't you dare to cry. You dare and see what can I do."

"Okay okay, I won't" and smiled trying not to let down my tears.

"Let me do your hair" I nodded and smiled.

I saw how beautifully she curled up the ends, adding small flowers and hair accessories one by one patiently, that was way too time-consuming, I could see how carefully and gently she was doing it. It took her half an hour to complete full, she did my side bangs carefully and made them look pretty even make sure to set my baby hair.

"Now stand up" I got up from the stool and looked at my mirror, I really looked pretty, Yoona made me look so beautiful, if only I was marrying Choi Seungcheol, I would've been so happy right now, so happy that I would've been on cloud nine right now. "Thank you so much Yoona" I hugged her tight, she hugged me back. "Thank you for everything, you made me look so pretty, thank you for being my best friend and for that someone on whom I can rely on"

"Ay, you ain't making me cry right now or you aren't crying either; if you do I will hit you hard right now I don't care if your wedding ruins because of that. Huh" I pulled apart and smiled at her. She took my sling bag, phone and didn't forget to take my veil and held my hand "Now let's go, we need to go to the venue."

[Time Skip]

I was in a room, Yoona fixed the veil for the last time and smiled at me, it was the biggest smile, I've ever seen on her face. "You look perfect my bff"

I saw mum and dad coming inside, "Erica" mum hugged me tight, I was trying to pull off a smile "You look so gorgeous my daughter" she looked happy as well as my dad.

Dad took out a small box, he opened it, it was a ring, probably my wedding ring. It looked familiar, I remember this design, I always wanted this particular ring in my wedding. "You always wanted this design, right?" I was surprised because of his words. I wore it, knowing I need to carry this responsibility and the title of someone's wife from the moment I take vows today. It was overwhelming, I never thought I would feel this nervous, heavy, anxious like this.

"Time, to walk down the aisle my daughter" I nodded and saw Yoona smiling big at me and taking my mum out of the room.

"Be happy, my everything. I can never see you sad. Hope you will be happy today" dad's words were breaking me from inside, those words looked so genuine to me, they sounded so genuine. I was getting teary, but I promised myself not to cry. I won't cry today.

Dad gave me his arm to hold, I took a deep breath and held his hand "Dad, please take care of me and please don't let me fall"

"Sure" I walked towards the aisle, everything looked so beautiful, the whole decorations, white flowers, I was holding my bouquet. I could hear piano as if someone was hitting the keys very beautifully which resulted in a beautiful melody, I was looking down, on the ground, my white heels, were making the clicking sound, it sounds good with the piano, maybe? I had no courage to see in front, I was getting anxious, almost couldn't believe that this is my wedding and my fiancé is not someone whom I loved all these years.

I tried looking to my side and noticed Jeonghan, and the moment I eyes went to the piano, it was Wenjun, and if I am right, it's one of Seungcheol's friend; I know all of his friends because he introduced me as his girlfriend to all his friends and I remember all of them, I've met them because of him. I couldn't believe it because there's no way mom would invite me because she doesn't know him at all and this can't be a coincidence is it Jeonghan? But why would he? Yoona? No way. My grip on dad's arm got tighter, "Are you okay?" he asked, his tone sounded worried, "yes" my whisper was enough for him to hear what I said. I looked to my sides, there I saw my friends and…. Seungcheol's friends, all of them were there, everyone. I saw Jeonghan smiling at me sweetly. I was confused enough and then I looked in front of me, my fiancé was facing his back to me, it's Jihoon, right? I questioned myself because his back felt different more like it felt like it wasn't Jihoon but someone whom I love. I can't let my mind mess up with me by thinking that this is Seungcheol because I know from now on everything will change, I can't love him anymore, I shouldn't be loving him anymore. My mind is playing games. I was getting closer and my heart was beating faster, dad stopped.

I took a deep breath and the moment he turned back to look at me, I gasped. I looked at my dad, he was smiling. "Your prince" I couldn't believe my eyes at all. I still can't believe this, he is standing in front of me. I wanted to run to him, I wanted to be in his arms.

He came down and my dad smiled at him, looking at him my heart was beating faster and it was skipping beats, he was looking perfect with hair pulled back and a black tuxedo; to be exact the outfit I chose for him when we randomly went to decide our wedding outfits.

"Thankyou for taking care of my daughter till now and please take care of her, she needs your love; she really loves you and I believe you my son" I could feel dad's voice shake. I was already in tears, I couldn't hold them anymore, I was feeling happy and sad, all the feelings were overwhelming.

Dad took my hand and placed it on his hand, he smiled at me. His hands were warm, and as usual, my cold hands fit perfectly with his warm hands, his touch made me feel relaxed and made me feel like I am back to life again, I longed for his warmth and touches. I was crying already, I was just way too happy or I just don't know what I am supposed to do, he was holding my hand with delicacy, I still couldn't believe everything that's happening right now with me.

I never thought dad would accept everything and even mom, when I was at home everything seemed so impossible, probably Yoona knew everything and that's why she didn't tell me anything since morning because she came home yesterday and met my mom.

"Love, don't cry" he whispered slowly while walking but was enough to hear for me, I nodded slightly. I just couldn't tell him how much I wanted to hug him and tell him I missed him and I am sorry for breaking us apart so many times.

We went and father started reading and we were ready to take the bows,

"I do, I love you" I heard him say

"I do, I love you too" I didn't hold myself anymore, 'you definitely own me explanations Mrs. Choi'

I couldn't wait to be his officially, I pulled him closer and kissed him.

"I'm sorry for what I did, it's just I love to lose but I can't lose you because I still love you."