#Honesty

On another day like this, here comes me trying to be positive and let everyone be able to see the reason why life deserves second chance. This whole novel writing is based on mostly how I feel. The same way I used to be feeling or maybe still is majority of teens go through the same. So why must I write it in figurative language for the readers? Why only now I decided to say something like this when things were going great I hoped. I'm trying to give myself this chance let myself out there and probably received some voice. Everyone goes through dramas and all sort of problems. Most keep it to their selves or tell someone and put their burden on others. But what do I do? I have a drink and then come on here and start typing my worries and stress out...like really? Who does that? Maybe someone typical like me would do so. I tried to sleep everything off and tends to run away from problems. Some would read and say what kind of teen would have so much problems on them at this young age?

For starters, I'll break it down to you. I finished my secondary education and during the course I did part time job as a sales representative. When I was out of schooling now I just join few jobs and already quit all. For some reasons I don't know why I say to myself, "maybe I'm just a quitter". Some people say I need to think about what I want to do and some would say just do what you like to do. So you see that's the problem, I don't know what I want to do. I feel stuck, confuse, be having anxiety be thinking to myself and all maybe I need a therapy because I'm afraid I won't be able to figure it out. Yes! They say I'm still young and I'm not there yet. Then when I look over to others they have it all decided and know what they want to do and become. All the jobs I quit so far it's just not for me. I don't even know what's for me and now I'm just stuck at home and here I writing a novel and thinking to myself I'm just wasting time I guessed. You won't believe I went in the technical stream because I was good in drawing and designing plans based on how I had no choice since their were for scores. The other day I went and apply for a clinic job which based on science and was totally out of blue. I mean it's not like that's what I want to do. I'm just applying all over online just to get a job so I can earn money. I know, you reading and being all confused and thinking is this child dumb or crazy or something. Same here I think to myself that way as well. But from all of that you know what I learned? Me watching and want to be like how everyone else is or should say how every teen is. How they have it all figured out and how I want to be like them. Which I'm so wrong. I should never put myself like that even though I'm writing this but I got to learn to look away from the negativity and the low talks and just head towards the right path. So what if I chose the wrong path? You can't just hop over to the right path and thinking it would all be good. Besides I'm still living and trying to at least built a name for myself. Which is why I'm going to write and say as it is how life is going and I'm sure there must be a few out there who are as stuck as me.