Five

Sarah was just finishing getting the kitchen cleaned and ready for the day tomorrow. Tired from what felt like an exceptionally long day, she stifled a yawn and turned to the sink full of clean, but wet, dishes. A steady stream of rain was falling outside; light pitter patters pounding on the window and trickling down the paned glass.

Sighing, Sarah dumped the last cup of the coffee down the drain and then started to dry the dishes and wipe down the counter. Once that was finished, she filled the coffee pot with water and poured it through to clean the machine.

Just as she was reaching for the broom to sweep, something lightly tapped on the back door. Frowning, she slung a dish towel over her shoulder and brushed aside the sheer curtain hanging in front of the window. Because of the light, she wasn't able to see who was standing there. She flipped the lock and cautiously opened the door.

Sarah gasped, startled at seeing the girl standing on the back porch.

It was Haven, dressed in sweatpants stained with what could only be blood. Her hands, arms and face were likewise smeared with blood. Blood and dirt and dripping rain water. And in her arms was a tiny baby. Also covered in blood and dirt, loosely wrapped in a sweatshirt and crying.

"S-Sarah… I need your h-help," Haven stammered, tears streaming down her face as she shivered in the cold. Her teeth audibly chattered together and she looked like she was going to collapse.

"Haven, what—? Whose baby is that? What happened…?"

"She—she's mine," the girl choked out, water dripping from the ends of her hair. She swallowed. "Please d-don't… call the police."

Sarah blinked. Lightly shook her head. Quickly stepping aside, she gestured Haven to come in and then shut and locked the door behind her.

"When was she born?" Sarah asked, pulling a chair out from the table and guiding Haven to sit down. She gently moved part of the sweatshirt aside to get a better look at the little one. She was small. Prematurely small. Her little cries were shrill, but quiet, and her fists waved in the air.

"A f-few minutes ago," Haven murmured, the fatigue obvious in her voice. Her breathing had turned heavy as if it was a concentrated effort and a look of pain contorted her face.

Getting a soft cloth wet with warm water, Sarah gently started washing the baby's face. "A few minutes—?" she stopped, seeing both of them shivering. The baby's little chin quivered and her cries continued to fill the room. "Okay, come on sweetheart, I want you to come upstairs with me—can you stand up?"

Haven nodded, using her free arm to push against the table as she stood. Sarah hurried to her side and helped her up.

"Let's go upstairs and we'll get you into a hot bath. Clean yourself up as best you can, and I'll get her warmed up."

Haven's eyes widened in horror. She weakly recoiled and started to back away, a fresh wave of tears already gathering in her red-rimmed eyes. "No, no, no, please don't take her! I promise I'll give her a bath and t-try and feed her just don't t-take her away—"

Sarah put her hands up as if in surrender. "I'm not going to take your baby from you. Understand? I won't do anything you don't want me to; you get to call the shots."

Haven swallowed. Her teeth started chattering again.

"But we need to get her—both of you, really—cleaned, warmed up, and fed or she'll get sick."

"I don't want her to get sick." Haven shivered, shaking her head.

"Then let's all go upstairs together, get you into a bath, clean her up and we'll go from there; I won't take her out of your sight, I promise. You keep her with you at all times. Sound good?"

Haven didn't reply for several seconds. Finally, out of what looked to be sheer exhaustion, she nodded.

Sarah hesitated before putting her arm around Haven's shoulders and giving her a comforting squeeze. Together, they walked upstairs to the top floor.

Along the way, Sarah snatched a small cradle from one of the empty family rooms. Swinging open one of the unoccupied suites on the upper floor, Sarah guided Haven through before she closed the door after them.

"No, no, this room is t-too nice—" Haven protested, shaking her head.

"And tonight it's for your and your beautiful new baby," Sarah interrupted gently.

While Haven stood a trifle awkwardly against the closed door, Sarah headed straight to the bathroom and drew a hot bath in the large tub, filling it with some sweet-smelling bath soaps.

"There's… still a lot of blood," Haven whispered as tears sprang to her eyes. She stood frozen to the spot.

Sarah waved her hand in the air. "It's fine," she replied easily. "Are you okay to stand up? Do you want to take a quick shower first?"

Haven nodded silently.

"Can I give your baby a bath? I'll keep her right here; you can see the sink from there."

Haven swallowed. She nodded wordlessly again.

Sarah slowly approached her, her arms carefully reaching for the baby, whose crying had lessened ever so slightly.

Haven reluctantly passed her bundle over, her eyes filling with desperation.

Expertly cradling the infant in one arm, Sarah helped Haven undress and get into the shower while the bath continued to fill. "Are you good?" Sarah asked.

Haven nodded, standing beneath the stream of water and letting the warmth wash away the layer of grime on her skin. She sighed.

"Sit down if you need to."

Haven nodded, sliding down the wall to the ground.

Sarah turned her attention to filling one of the sinks with warm water and giving the baby a quick bath. Her continual crying elicited a low sniffle from Haven, whose eyes never left her. The baby quieted down as she grew warmer, her eyes relaxing from their squint and closing.

Haven moved quickly as she feebly rinsed the mud and blood from her arms and legs before murmuring she was finished.

"Alright, give me two seconds," Sarah replied, bundling the infant up in a warm blanket and laying her down in the cradle before turning her attention to Haven. She helped her climb into the already prepared bath tub filled with hot water.

"How's the water, is it to hot?"

Haven shook her head, faintly groaning. She let Sarah do a more thorough job of washing her skin clean and soaping through her long hair, gradually starting to relax.

"Haven? Where did you go? When... she was being born?" Sarah asked slowly, frowning silently as she studied the young girl.

Haven swallowed, growing rigid again as she hedged. "The—the woods," she finally replied quietly.

Sarah's eyebrows shot up. "The woods? Right back behind the orchard?"

Haven nodded. She blinked and a tear spilled onto her face. "I'm s-so sorry; I know it wasn't smart. I was just s-scared and I didn't know where to go or if you would be upset that I was having a baby—" she murmured, her words mushing together as she hurried to get them all out.

"Okay, it's okay," Sarah smiled reassuringly, moving around so Haven could look at her. "You are a very brave girl, you know that?"

Haven lightly frowned. "I just… didn't know where to go, and I didn't know if…" her quiet voice trailed off.

"I know. I'm sorry you had to do that by yourself, that's… no easy task, but don't worry about it, okay? You're both fine now, so don't be sorry. At least not for my sake. Nothing's wrong with your baby, she's perfect, and healthy, and happy."

"R-really? She is?" Haven asked, her eyes rounding. "I didn't… do anything wrong?"

Sarah smiled, shaking her head. Wringing Haven's hair out of any access water, she paused and looked at her. Her deep blue eyes were again brimming with tears. "No, not at all. She's fine. Are you…? Would you be comfortable going to the hospital? Letting a doctor look at both of you?"

Haven shook her head, fear flashing across her face. "No, no, I can't—no."

"Haven, please think about it. If you get an infection or if something doesn't heal right I won't know what—"

"I know, I know, I just can't let him—" Haven abruptly stopped talking as she broke down in tears again.

Sarah knelt down beside the tub and gently wrapped her arms around Haven's wet, slim shoulders. "It's okay, sweetheart. We don't have to go," she said softly, realizing Haven was too worked up to think clearly.

Haven, her face pressed into Sarah's shoulder, nodded.

Sarah started to stand back up, but Haven held on. "It's okay," Sarah whispered.

Haven took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Thank you. For… for helping me. I'm sorry,"

Sarah smiled, stroking the girl's wet hair. "Don't be sorry, it was a slow night."

Finally, Haven let go and rubbed her eyes.

While she gently combed through Haven's hair, Sarah asked her a series of questions about when she was in labor, trying to make a rough assessment if everything had gone normally or if there was the possibility something had gone wrong.

Haven answered them as best as she could, but it was clear she didn't remember a whole lot and wasn't paying close attention to what was happening. She started breathing heavier and her hands trembled ever so slightly. Tears pooled in her eyes.

Sarah paused. "Haven, take a deep breath."

Haven swallowed, drawing a deep, but shaky, inhale. She nodded.

"You're okay. You're safe, your baby's safe… everything will be just fine. Everything is fine."

Haven managed a slight nod.

Sarah could see the fear mirrored in Haven's eyes. A horror no one her age should know, let alone experience. She started to say something else but Haven's attention shifted to her baby, who had managed to get one of her arms loose from Sarah's wrap job. She started quietly fussing.

"She's crying," Haven whimpered, moving to get out.

"Stay put, I'll get her for you," Sarah murmured, resting her hand on Haven's arm. Crossing to the other side of the bathroom, Sarah gently picked the little one up and sat down on the edge of the tub, passing the bundle to Haven and helping her get a good hold on her.

"The blanket's gonna get wet."

"That's okay, I can get you a dry one when you're ready to get out. There, see?" Sarah murmured, glancing at Haven as the baby quieted. "She just needed to see you again."

Haven nodded slowly, faintly smiling as she held the warm little girl in her arms.

"Did you feed her?" Sarah asked softly.

Haven shook her head. "No."

"Okay, let's see if we can try."

Staying in the warm tub, Haven let Sarah help her hold the baby the right way. For almost ten minutes Haven tried to feed her but with no success. Maybe it was because she ready to drop with exhaustion or something else entirely, but her baby didn't seam to be getting anything.

"She's… she's going to starve!" Haven murmured, ready to start crying herself as her little one started to whimper again.

"No she's not," Sarah replied gently. "We'll try again in a few minutes, but for now we'll use some formula, okay? The store is just down the street, I'll go run and grab you some."

Haven swallowed, nodding.

Sarah paused, glancing at the baby. "Does she have a name?"

Haven shook her head self-consciously. She sniffed, wiping her face with one of her hands. "No. Not—not yet."

Sarah smiled. "That's okay, there's plenty of time." She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "Come on, let's get you dried off and we'll try and feed… Princess again, okay?"

Haven smiled nervously.

"I'm going to go to my room and get you something to wear, I'll be right back." Sarah stood up, setting the tub to maintain its temperature before slipping through the door.

* * *

Haven took a few deep breaths, swallowing the sense of impending danger and trying not to cry again. A tear spilled onto her face. She sniffed, brushing it away with the back of her hand and gently tightening her arms around her little one. The water was still hot, the goose bumps melting from her skin.

Reaching behind her for a soft towel, she dried her hand off and gently stroked her baby's face. Sniffing, she involuntarily smiled as an overwhelming pulse of love for the tiny human being lying against her flooded every fiber of her being.

The little one grunted gently.

Cleaned from blood and dirt, Haven studied her clearly for the first time. The hair she had was soft and pale, still damp, and clinging to her head. Her eyes were crushed shut and her lower lip was sticking out just a little. It was strange, seeing her—an actual, living, person. It was hard to think she was actually inside her not two hours before.

Sarah returned in only twenty minutes or so, a clean, dry pair of sweats and a long sleeved shirt in her hands.

Haven looked up at her, relief bringing tears to her eyes.

"Alright, can I take her again?"

Haven nodded, passing her baby back to Sarah and watching as she was laid back down in her cradle. Sarah reached for a white, fluffy towel and held it up for Haven.

Ten minutes later, after Haven was warmly clad in Sarah's comfortable loungewear and had snuggled up in the beautifully luxurious bed, Sarah handed her back her baby. A soft blanket was wrapped around her tiny little body.

"I went ahead and picked up a package of diapers but we'll go out and stock up on everything you need tomorrow," Sarah murmured softly, arranging another blanket on top of Haven. "I want you to try and feed her one more time before we use the formula, okay?"

Haven swallowed, nodding nervously.

Sarah again helped her cradle her baby against her chest; supporting her arms as she struggled with the feat.

"I can't. I can't do it; she's not getting anything," Haven said a few minutes later, her voice growing faint as she started to cry again in frustration.

"Okay, it's okay. We'll use a bottle. Here; give her this," Sarah replied as she handed Haven the pre-made milk.

"It's… its okay?"

"What's okay?"

"Using this instead of…"

"Yes, of course."

Haven nodded, sniffing. She looked down at the little bundle in her arms as she, a little uncertainty, fed her. Whimpering gently, the little one quickly settled down and took to the bottle with renewed vigor. Her eyes slowly cracked open, and she drank the entire thing with only a few grunts and groans.

"There, that's better, huh?" Sarah chuckled after several minutes of peaceful silence.

"Yeah." Haven sighed, smiling in relief. "Poor baby's s-starving."

"Nah, she's fine."

Haven smiled, glancing down again. One of her baby's hands had loosened from its fist. "She's… she's really fine?" she asked, her voice barely audible as she gazed at her little girl. She had to be okay. Happy and healthy and perfect. If anything was wrong with her or if anything happened, Haven would never forgive herself. That was her one reasonability—her only responsibility. To keep her baby safe. To protect her.

"Absolutely. She's wonderful. Here." Sarah nodded towards a plate on the nightstand. "Your turn to eat."

Haven didn't realize how hungry she was until she noticed the food. Sarah must have just made it. Much to her embarrassment, she downed the chicken and rice, ignoring the way it burned her tongue. When she was finished, Sarah took the plate and stood up.

"I'll let you get some rest. If you need me, just buzz."

Haven tensed. "What if she gets hungry again?"

Sarah pursed her lips thoughtfully. "I'll make you another bottle and leave it here on the nightstand."

"Okay," Haven whispered, exhaling a shaky breath as she sniffed again.

Sarah turned to leave again.

"Sarah?"

Sarah stopped and turned around.

"Um… thank you," Haven murmured.

"You thank me by keeping that baby warm and then getting some rest." Sarah smiled. She shut the door softly behind her as she left.

Haven felt herself relax ever so slightly. She knew, deep down, she was safe here. At the inn. In Maple Valley. With Sarah. No one knew where to find her; no one knew she was even pregnant, so her baby was safe.

"I guess I need a name for you," Haven murmured as she fingered with her little one's fist. "Can't keep calling you 'baby', forever, right? That would be mean." She lightly stoked the side of her baby's tiny face. She was so small. And beautiful. A tiny part of Haven tried to find something horribly familiar about her… she tried to see Damien.

But when she did, the part of Damien that was in her wasn't ugly or scary because she was amazing. Damien was a monster, but she wasn't him.

And it was in that realization that she really and truly fell in love with her. Because there was nothing to be afraid of when she looked into her sweet, sleeping face. No danger lurked there. Only comfort and peace.

Haven's heart strings melted, pulling and wrapping like steel cables around her little baby and sewing the two of them together in an unbreakable bond. She never, ever thought it would be possible to love someone as much as she loved this little girl.

Haven kissed her soft cheek, sniffing back tears and blinking slowly. She smelled faintly of warm cinnamon; the way Sarah did. The way the inn did.

Haven laid her head back against the soft pillows, beginning to feel another wave of fatigue wash over her. She tried to let herself unwind—taking a deep breath in and letting it out slowly. The room was warm and cozy. Sarah must have gotten a fire started in the fireplace at one point; now it was crackling in the still air. The flames created shadows that danced on the walls and pulses of warmth radiated towards the bed. Outside the rain was still falling, the soft rumble a soothing lullaby.

Sarah snuck back in a few minutes later, armed with several additional bottles and a spare blanket.

"Are you still doing alright?" Sarah asked, setting the neatly folded blanket down beside Haven and the bottles on the nightstand. She leaned over to look at the baby, sleeping comfortably.

Haven nodded, stifling a yawn.

"Good." Sarah smiled. "Do you want me to stay and sleep in here, or leave you alone for the night?" she asked as she moved towards the door, a little uncertainly.

Haven bit her lip. She honestly didn't know. Her instinctive answer was to be left alone, but she didn't want to be alone. Being alone was scary. What if her baby started crying and she couldn't get her to stop? Or something happened and… she had no idea what to do?

Besides… Haven was safe with Sarah. Sarah would protect her from the monsters of solitude.

"Can you s-stay?" Haven asked timidly. "I just… if she starts crying, or gets sick, I won't know how to help her. And… I d-don't want to be a-alone," she stammered, embarrassed and ready to cry again.

Sarah smiled. "Of course." She brought out a few additional larger blankets from the cabinet and made herself comfortable on the plush chair opposite Haven. She turned on the small lamp beside her before turning off the main light.

"Are you comfortable?" she asked quietly, moving another pillow closer so Haven could reach it if she wanted and tucking the extra blanket around her.

Haven nodded, sniffing. "Y-yeah. Thank you."

Sarah wheeled the cradle beside the bed.

"Do you want to keep holding her or put her down?"

Haven sniffed again, rubbing her eyes. "Will she be okay if I put her in her crib?" she finally asked.

"Yes, of course," Sarah smiled, nodding. She helped Haven put her little one down and tuck her in before moving to a chair across the room beside the window and picking up a book, deciding to wait until Haven was asleep before going to sleep herself.

Haven's eyes followed Sarah. "Can, um… could you maybe…" she mumbled, looking at the space in the bed beside her. Her eyes welled up as she struggled with her words.

"What is it, sweetheart?"

"Could you… sleep here with me?"

Sarah's smile softened even more.

"Yes, of course," she nodded, picking up her blanket and book. Gently getting onto the bed beside Haven, she put her arm around she as she snuggled against her. Haven's breathing turned relaxed and peaceful.

"Are you warm enough?" Sarah whispered, pulling the blanket that had slipped up and over Haven's shoulders.

Haven nodded. "Yeah."

It was a strange feeling for her, being so close to someone, so completely exhausted and vulnerable, but feeling protected instead of petrified.

It was a full three minutes before Haven's mind began to shut off and she drifted into a peaceful sleep.