Confession - Volume 2

Natsuo was startled awake when he felt tiny paws crawling across his chest. He saw his calico-coated cat purring softly as it kneaded its claws and curled up in a ball on his stomach.

His mouth let out a soft gasp when Miso had never shown affection like that toward him before. He smiled as he reached out to pet the cat, feeling its soft fur beneath his fingertips.

Natsuo glanced at the nightstand and saw a water bottle and a bottle of painkillers, no doubt left there for his hangover. He even found his black-covered smartphone on the bed next to him. His heart pounded with hope as he opened his phone, but he saw no new messages from his spouse.

"What are you doing Jiro...?"

Natsuo smiled sadly and stroked Miso's head, grateful for the small comfort the cat was providing him in his loneliness.

"Should we call him?"

Natsuo dialed Jiro's number, but all he got was an automated voice telling him that the number was not available. He tapped out a brief message to Jiro, expressing his need to talk and work things out. After taking a deep breath, he sent another text, confessing his love for Jiro and how much he missed him.

"How are you feeling?" Hide asked as he suddenly appeared in the doorway, smiling with a sympathetic expression.

Natsuo's face became troubled as he could only think of the pain he was having without Jiro. He felt alone and misunderstood, wishing he could just talk to his partner and have things return to the way they were before.

"I.."

Hide silently moved next to Natsuo, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder. Natsuo didn't dare move, not wanting to disturb the cat that was snuggled comfortably on his stomach.

"I need to see him. I should - "

Natsuo's eyes widened in surprise as Hide leaned in and kissed him. A wave of heat rose up his neck as he tried to process what was happening - for a moment he noticed how his lips tasted like cigarettes. His head spun as he pushed Hide away, his face flushed.

"W-what are you doing?" He stammered, his voice trembling.

Hide's black eyes were deep as he gazed at him. He was reminded of the first time he had seen Natsuo in school, sitting alone shoulders slumped and a troubled look in his eyes.

The warmth and contentment that he had found in Natsuo were unlike anything he had ever experienced. His eyes were deep blue like the ocean and his coffee-brown hair was messy, but still shining in the sunlight that streamed through the window. He was somehow beautiful, a sight that made Hide's heart swell with affection.

"I know this is sudden, and it's probably a lot to take in, but I need you to know this. I'm in love with you."

Natsuo's stomach churned as he heard Hide's words and he couldn't bring himself to face him. He carefully scooped Miso up and placed her on the bed beside him, his heart still pounding from the sudden shock.

"And I know you are in love with Takuya... but I want you to know that there are others who will always care for you..."

Natsuo quickly grabbed his jumper shirt and tried to get up, but his legs were like rubber. His head throbbed painfully and his vision was blurry as he struggled to stand.

"I-I'm sorry... I need to leave now," he said, not daring to look at Hide as he was about to lift Miso into his arms.

"Did you know he hired those thugs after you back then?"

Natsuo froze for a second, his hands on Miso's fur. He took a deep breath and spoke slowly.

"I know it sounds crazy but... it had to be done."

Hide frowned as a low smile curled on Natsuo's lips and he saw his disbelief slowly fading away.

"There's no way I would have moved in with him otherwise... I would have gone back to the streets and probably just... starved..." Natsuo sighed and felt a stab of pain as he remembered Jiro's last words to him.

"But he hurt you," Hide said as Natsuo's slightly bruised wrist peeked beneath his shirt.

"Well... I shot him once."

Hide was surprised, his eyes widening in confusion as he heard Natsuo's words.

"I didn't mean it and he forgave me... we have hurt each other, for sure. I tormented him and he wanted to get revenge on me. We have risked our lives for each other and promised to spend the rest of our lives together... there is no one else for me than my Jiro," Natsuo said as he placed his hand on his chest, unable to imagine his life without him.

Hide swallowed, his hands clenching into fists.

"Can I fight for you? I won't let anyone hurt you ever again. I'll do whatever it takes to protect you," he vowed, his voice strong and determined.

Natsuo shook his head, with a grim smile on his lips.

"It's alright. I think I'm strong enough to fight my own battles and defend those who matter to me."

He looked into Hide's eyes, his expression conveying his sincere thanks. Hide sighed in disappointment, knowing he would never have the chance to explore the feelings he had for Natsuo.

"Perhaps it would be better if we stopped seeing each other," Natsuo said troubled as he remembered how Jiro had been so protective of him and how jealous he had become. He realized that meeting with Hide would only lead to more harm in the end.

"If that's what you want," Hide said quietly as he forced a smile on his face.

"I hope you will meet someone who feels the same way one day," Natsuo said warmly.

(Later that day)

"Have you seen Jiro? Could you tell him to call me if you hear from him? Thanks," Natsuo told Rei before hanging up. He tried calling his spouse one more time, but it ended up going straight to voice mail.

Natsuo had returned to their home and was surprised to find it empty. The only sign of life was empty beer bottles scattered around the kitchen and living room.

He sat on the couch, his eyes looking into the void, wondering what Jiro was doing at that very moment. His guess was that Jiro had ventured out drinking after the worst argument of their lives, trying to find relief in the bottom of a bottle.

Natsuo tried to track Jiro's phone but it was turned off, so he couldn't tell where he was or what was going on. He sighed and buried his face in his hands, still unable to wrap his head around what had happened between them.

He had always been there for his partner, but he felt like he was being taken for granted. It was difficult for him not to feel resentful of Jiro for forcing him to worry like that. He was growing tired of constantly looking out for him and picking up the pieces of their struggling romance.

Natsuo grabbed a pen and a sheet of paper to write him a letter.

He wrote about how he was still devoted to Jiro, no matter what had happened between them. Natsuo had sworn to Jiro that night that he would always love him because he was the only person in his heart.

He wanted to be with Jiro for the rest of their lives, to cherish him forever and bring him back from the dark place he had fled to. Tears wet his eyes as he thought about the possibility of them never being together again and the pain that had crumbled the bond between them.

His gaze wandered around the room, seeing the paintings they had hung on the wall, the furniture they had bought together, and all the memories they had made in this place. The floor was splattered in beer stains from the argument that had taken place.

He wiped his eyes with the back of his hand and continued writing with a shaking hand, spilling his heart and soul into the letter.

Natsuo most feared waking up one day and finding a lifeless husband next to him. He had already overdosed once and didn't want to experience that ever again. Jiro had been careless with his medication and he had been blessed to survive his fate in the past because Natsuo was there to save him.

But he couldn't always be there to rescue Jiro and breathe life back into him, no matter how much he wanted to. His dream was to live a fulfilling and loving life with Jiro, but it could only be possible if Jiro accepted his help. Natsuo was willing to share his existence with Jiro, but only if he was committed to walking with him, not pushing him away.

He explained that he had decided to head to Tokyo to stay with his mother and asked Jiro to join him there if he wanted to repair their strained relationship. Natsuo had researched that the top rehabilitation centers were located in the capital and promised to support Jiro every step of the way if he entered one.

Lastly, he vowed to search for a cure to Jiro's pain from the ends of the world and promised they would never give up, regardless of how long it took to find it.

He had never given up hope when Jiro was in a coma and doctors said he would never wake up, but against all odds, Jiro did survive. There was no doubt in his mind that Jiro was the strongest person he had ever met. He could endure his darkest moments, but it would be up to him to find the strength to fight his demons and take control of his life.

(Later that day)

It was already dark when Natsuo had driven to Tokyo and the lights from the city were glowing in the night sky. He was exhausted from the long trip, but his heart still raced uncontrollably. Natsuo was filled with growing anxiety, knowing that the following days could be the last chance to make things right and salvage his relationship with Jiro.

Natsuo parked his car in front of a large traditional Japanese house. The building was two stories tall with a dark timber exterior and latticed windows. It had a curved tiled roof and a spacious garden surrounded by a low white fence.

"I'll be right back, okay?" Natsuo said to Miso who was sleeping in her cage, her face hidden under her fluffy tail. He took a deep breath and slowly stepped out of the car. His legs shook as he walked up the path to the door.

The door opened, revealing a woman with a brown bun tied tightly to the back of her head. Her deep dark eyes watched his son with warmth.

Natsuo's lips trembled as he tried to speak, but he couldn't utter a word. His eyes welled up, tears streaming down his face as the emotions he had held inside suddenly boiled up.

Saika opened her arms and hugged Natsuo tightly, and for a few moments, neither of them said anything. She gently patted his hair, her fingers lightly brushing his forehead, soothing away all of his worries.

Natsuo finally looked up at her, tears rolling down his face and she softly wiped them away. He had never expected that they would meet like this again, after all the time they had spent apart.

"There is a room ready for you. Feel free to stay here for as long as you like," Saika said. A delicious smell of freshly cooked food was wafting through the air, emanating from the kitchen.

Although he had lost a friendship with Hide and was in danger of losing his relationship with Jiro, Natsuo could still find comfort in the fact that he had his long-lost mother back in his life...