Chapter 32: Dreams and Death

I. ..saw mom last night.

We were put shopping on the streets of wanza, the town where my uni is located. I was happy. ...super happy. ...thinking of how I finally got her to get on a plane, and come see the world with me.

We were having a good time...walking arm in arm and laughing. However, here and there I kept seeing black faceless people in a black hooded robe. They went among people, just hovering. Nothing could be seen of their face or hands or legs. ...they just hovered. ...above the ground. ...talking to noone and doing nothing.

It didn't look like the people next to them could see them either.

I asked my mom if she could see them. ...but Somehow she doesn't hear me.

Then Somehow an old lady with a long white hair appears by my side and says. ...

'she can't see them. ....you can only see them because you are close'

'what do you mean I am close?' I ask. ..she says nothing and somehow fades in to the crowd.

Mother and I get into a bus and although she seemed just as happy as she was at first, I found that I was not listening to her. ...

I was thinking. ...that I was close. ...that I was dying.

I felt sad and angry ....and I was mumbling to myself. ...'but I've barely lived_but I've done nothing yet, I've barely lived!'

And as I kept seeing more and more of those black hooded figures. ....I said it louder and louder. ...until I was yanked out of sleep by my own voice.

Lol. That was one hell of a dream huh.

I usually don't remember my dreams...but this one was something. ...

I. ...who had always thought that I didn't deserve life. ...am not ready for death.

(Sure the dream might have been caused by a movie trailer I watched before sleep about a dead guy told to find out a soulmate because souls cross over in pairs, and him meeting a live girl who can see him because she was 'close'. ...and it doesn't help that a white haired lady said that )....but still. ..

That I've barely lived. ...that I've done nothing. ...that part was true. ...and the panic. ...that panic was super real.

I guess that's why am doing this- writing down all the bubbles in my head...fingers crossed that if I write it down. ...and call it an adventure. ...great things might happen among great disasters.

This is why you and me both don't know what will happen the very next chapter...not because this is a thriller or suspense. ...but rather...it's because neither life nor I can make up our minds about things.

That said. ....

An acquaintance became a friend to me today. He was someone I knew through my flatmates....and thought he didn't want to talk to me much.

But we actually talked today.

I even fell silent every now and then just to check if I was the one pushing the conversation...but he kept asking me questions and kept it going on. ...so I guess....we're cool with eachother. It is the first time I've talked with anybody all the way to campus.

It might because he was in a good mood cause he, his friends and a girl he is crushing on are going on a 4 day trip soon. I. ...can read people you see. ...if they're interacting with other people around me. ...but. ..I can't do that with the people directly interacting with me.

annnyyyy whooooo. ....

bye.