Growing up is hard enough, but it’s worse as a pacifist whose country is at war. Jim and Brian are neighbors, best friends, and high school graduates heading for college. In 1970 the Vietnam War raged, and Brian and Jim, both pacifists, worry about being drafted. To make matters worse, both men are gay and far from out. When Brian finally admits his feelings for his friend, he’s surprised and pleased Jim feels the same. Brian’s father teaches jujitsu, and the two men learn the ancient art, though neither believes in fighting. They struggle to overcome their pacifist tendencies amid racial tension and homophobia that threatens to tear their lives -- and their love -- apart. Can Brian and Jim turn fear into courage and learn to defend themselves, and each other, to create a life of love?

Fear and Courage

“You won’t tell anyone, will you?”


Jim wasn’t good in serious situations. “Hell, yeah. Gonna get a billboard ad.”


“Thanks for not hating me, but I still hate myself. I’m such a—”


Jim pressed his fingers to Brian’s lips, gave him another deep kiss, then dressed and went home, thinking about Brian and his own courage to tell the truth. Jim hated himself for being a coward, but he’d finally come out to Brian, even though it had taken him a while.


At his house, he slipped into his bedroom and propped a chair against the door. With thoughts of Brian once again filling his mind, he stripped to his boring white briefs and yanked his cock free. He tasted his pre-cum and fisted his dick, milking more. He could think only of Brian. Sexy, sweet Brian. And he knew he could make Brian happy. He imagined sucking his friend’s big dick, filling his mouth. His arm tired and the jacking became erratic, yet he couldn’t stop. He urged himself to come, but didn’t.


Chapter 16