Growing up is hard enough, but it’s worse as a pacifist whose country is at war. Jim and Brian are neighbors, best friends, and high school graduates heading for college. In 1970 the Vietnam War raged, and Brian and Jim, both pacifists, worry about being drafted. To make matters worse, both men are gay and far from out. When Brian finally admits his feelings for his friend, he’s surprised and pleased Jim feels the same. Brian’s father teaches jujitsu, and the two men learn the ancient art, though neither believes in fighting. They struggle to overcome their pacifist tendencies amid racial tension and homophobia that threatens to tear their lives -- and their love -- apart. Can Brian and Jim turn fear into courage and learn to defend themselves, and each other, to create a life of love?

Fear and Courage

Jim and Brian horseplayed for a while, then settled and talked with the others.


“You two are gay, right?” one of the lesbians asked.


“Yup,” Brian said, feeling good about his answer, confessing to total strangers with no embarrassment. Not even when Jim kissed him.


Everyone introduced themselves, including the hetero couple.


But the guy added, “I’m gay and Betty’s a lesbian. We’re from a strict and conservative religious community. We were pretty much set up to marry, so we did to please our parents. We were supposed to go forth and multiply, but we didn’t screw on our wedding night, and two months into it with still no sex, I confessed to Betty that I was gay. She floored me by saying she was a lesbian. So for now, we pretend. We like each other and will stay together until someone better comes along.” He sighed. “We’ve talked about faking a new job for me in some other city far away and moving there so we can be out.”


Chapter 20