Growing up is hard enough, but it’s worse as a pacifist whose country is at war. Jim and Brian are neighbors, best friends, and high school graduates heading for college. In 1970 the Vietnam War raged, and Brian and Jim, both pacifists, worry about being drafted. To make matters worse, both men are gay and far from out. When Brian finally admits his feelings for his friend, he’s surprised and pleased Jim feels the same. Brian’s father teaches jujitsu, and the two men learn the ancient art, though neither believes in fighting. They struggle to overcome their pacifist tendencies amid racial tension and homophobia that threatens to tear their lives -- and their love -- apart. Can Brian and Jim turn fear into courage and learn to defend themselves, and each other, to create a life of love?

Fear and Courage

Mrs. Wilson hosted many parties for the kids, who loved the swimming pool. Jim flashed back to the three times she walked in on him changing into, or out of, his swimsuit, and how her eyes had always drifted low before she gave the perfunctory “Excuse me. I didn’t know anyone was in here”


“I’ll pay you well, but less than a regular service company, okay?”


She dug into her purse and wrote her number on a slip of paper. “Mid-week would be better while Mr. Wilson is at work. He hates noises from lawn mowers.” She smiled, tilted her head, and touched his cheek again before strolling off.


Jim got his items and waited in line to check out. From behind, a guy tapped his on the shoulder.


“Don’t I know you from somewhere?”


Jim looked up at a kid about his age, but taller and heavier. His large smile dimpled his cheeks and showed white teeth. “I don’t think so.”


Chapter 43