Growing up is hard enough, but it’s worse as a pacifist whose country is at war. Jim and Brian are neighbors, best friends, and high school graduates heading for college. In 1970 the Vietnam War raged, and Brian and Jim, both pacifists, worry about being drafted. To make matters worse, both men are gay and far from out. When Brian finally admits his feelings for his friend, he’s surprised and pleased Jim feels the same. Brian’s father teaches jujitsu, and the two men learn the ancient art, though neither believes in fighting. They struggle to overcome their pacifist tendencies amid racial tension and homophobia that threatens to tear their lives -- and their love -- apart. Can Brian and Jim turn fear into courage and learn to defend themselves, and each other, to create a life of love?

Fear and Courage

Mr. Truttle laughed and teased back. “Don’t you boys act up now or you’ll get grounded.” He laughed more, then went back to reading his paper.


A while later, Brian and Jim headed into the basement, where they read their books. 21


“I’m going to visit Matt Zimmerman a few blocks over,” Mr. Truttle called into the basement.


Chuckling, Brian said, “He’ll be gone for hours and come back half-stewed. Mr. Zimmerman makes his own beer.”


Jim put his book on the table, clasped his hands behind his head, and stretched. “I’m glad we don’t drink like the other kids. I don’t like feeling woozy and sure as hell never want to be throwing-up-drunk. Maybe because George drinks so much. I remember Mom arguing with Dad about drinking.”


Brian got that silly smirk on his face that Jim loved.


“I’m not a cop yet. I can’t arrest you.”


Chapter 57