It’s not easy being a gay man in Utah, but it’s even more difficult when you’re young and overweight. Jay has never fit in with the general “club culture” and he knows he’d never be attractive enough to catch a one-night stand, much less a boyfriend. Losing himself in books and school alleviates his loneliness, and he doesn’t waste time dreaming about what he can’t have. Until he meets the new director of the GLBT Center on campus and promptly falls in love -- against all common sense and logic.<br><br>Hoping to catch a few glimpses of Stephen outside of the Center, Jay decides to start working out at the university gym. The plan turns out to be too successful as Stephen volunteers to be his workout buddy, then invites Jay out to lunch, and finally, kisses him. Jay wants Stephen more than anything, but he can’t bring himself to trust Stephen’s intentions. Not when he knows he’s disgusting and Stephen is so perfect ...

From Behind that Locked Door

He recoiled from the mirror and slammed the backs of his legs against the bath tub, nearly tumbling in. From outside, he heard Jack’s worried voice. “Everything okay?”


He rinsed his mouth out with water, avoiding any view of the mirror. Putting on a manufactured smile, he left the bathroom and rejoined Jack in bed.


“Seeing out of only one eye has made me clumsy,” he lied. “No big deal.”


Jack dropped it. He kissed Cillian once more and wrapped his arms around him. They took a comfortable position amongst the pillows and blankets. Cillian kept his eyes closed as much as possible.


The next morning, he made food for both Jack and Henri. The latter couldn’t stop staring at her father’s eye patch. When he caught her gawking, she quickly looked away. Jack noticed, too, and told her it wasn’t nice to stare. “But I want one, too!” was her response.


Chapter 33