35

My plan isn't really that ingenious, but I think it'll work. It's what he wants, after all.

On Wednesday morning I get off the bus and head towards my first lesson: Physics, where my plan will begin.

Tom is sitting on the bench outside the classroom looking at his phone, waiting for the teacher to arrive. Fortunately, I didn't see Karen on the bus with me, so either she's skipping, or she's late. She's probably skipping.

Anyway, I sit next to Tom and say, "Hi."

"Hey, Emma," he answers.

"Whoa, how'd you know my name?" I ask.

Tom turns to look at me with a confused look. "What are you talking about?"

"I don't know your name," I act. "How do you know mine?"

Let me explain. I'm pretending not to know him because of a simple reason: he said he broke up with me because our relationship was born out of a lie. Then what better way to reconnect if not to start from the absolute beginning?

Of course, I'm hoping that it'll eventually turn into a romantic relationship again, but for now I'm just focusing on becoming friends.

I just hope he'll understand what I'm doing otherwise it'll be very embarrassing if I have to explain it to him.

"What–?" Tom asks again. "What are you–?" he interrupts himself, and his eyes widen a little. To my wonderful joy, Tom smirks – that wonderful, sexy smirk that I haven't seen for a long time. "I see what you're doing."

"What do you mean? And you still haven't answered my question," I say, although I'm smiling in a knowing way.

"Okay, fine," Tom says and turns off his phone. He faces me before answering, "I just guessed a name. You are an obvious Emma."

"Oh, am I?" I ask. "What about you? What's your name?"

"Guess."

I scratch my chin. "Hm… maybe Jerry? Or Richard? Oh, I know! Lester!" I say excitedly, and I see Tom frown.

"Lester? Really?" he says. "No. Seriously, pick a name."

"I honestly don't know. Maybe… Thomas?" I say suggestively.

"Hey, you almost got it," he cheers. "I'm Tom."

"I actually love that name," I say. "It's really cute."

"Cute?" Tom complains. "My name is not cute. It's manly and tough."

"Of course it is," I answer with a smile.

Tom smiles back, but our moment is interrupted by the arrival of our teacher. He opens the door and lets us in. Since Karen is absent, Tom and I get to sit next to each other. We don't do anything weird except for, you know, the pretending we don't know each other and stuff.

"Wow, you're really good at Physics," Tom points out during class. "You should be a tutor," he says with a smile.

"I was, but I don't think it's the right thing for me," I explain.

"You were? Who did you teach?" Tom asks with a smug smile.

"Oh, nobody special," I say. "He was just this guy."

"He sounds amazing," he pronounces. "Please, tell me more."

I smile and keep talking. "He was ugly and stupid. I mean seriously, he was so dumb that he almost couldn't add two numbers," I say confidently, but a part of me is about to burst out laughing. "I hated him. I hated him so much that I gave him bad advice and made him fail every exam."

"Ha-ha," Tom fake-laughs. "Tell me the truth."

"You want the truth? Fine," I say. This is your chance to tell him, I think. I lower my voice and look at my hands, embarrassed. "He was really nice. He was hot, smart, funny… just the perfect guy." I glance at Tom and see him blushing. I keep talking. "We were actually a couple for a while. We were really happy: we loved each other, and I was as happy as I'll ever be," I pause. "Until one day, I found out that he'd kept a really big secret from me. We kind of unraveled after that," I explained.

Tom's face is emotionless, but he too is looking down at his hands.

"The worst thing is, that only a few weeks later he got together with my best friend. I don't think he knows it, but it really hurt. I had to run away every time they greeted each other with hugs and kisses, to escape the pain. I still loved him, and I couldn't bear the thought of him with someone else," I say. "But I can't really do anything about it, can I?"

Tom doesn't say anything. He looks down at his sheet of paper with a straight face and thinks. Suddenly a small smile tugs at his lips, "He sounds like a real dick."

"Eh, you get used to it," I joke, and Tom laughs. The lesson goes on smoothly after that, with stupid jokes and stories we'd already shared.

I see Tom during our second class we have in common – English – and it goes as it had in physics. The only thing is… uh, I can't believe I'm saying this… that it doesn't feel right.

Don't get me wrong, I still like Tom, but I feel like I'm overstepping. Karen is in a relationship with him right now, and I basically told him that still loved him earlier. And I want to talk about it, but with whom? My first instinct would be to talk to Karen, but I obviously can't. My second choice would be Tom, but again, that won't work. I know that Sarah and Suzy will just tell me to confront Karen, so I don't want to talk to them. I guess that leaves me with only one option.

"Mom, can I talk to you?" I ask her as soon as I get home.

She's lying on the couch watching TV, but she turns it off. "What's wrong?"

"I need to tell you something, but it's a little embarrassing, especially when you tell your mother. So please, don't make it as worse as it is."

"Oh, god. Emma, what did you do? Are you smoking? Are you on drugs? Did someone knock you up? Oh, no. Are you pregnant?" she starts asking, but I stop her.

"Mom, you're making it worse," I say.

"Sorry, sorry," she apologizes. "Go on."

"You know Tom?" I ask. "He was my boyfriend, then we broke up."

"Yes, I'm aware of that," she says in an almost angry tone. You can't blame her. For weeks after our breakup, I was a wreck.

"Well, I found out that Tom and my best friend Karen are an item," I say, and my mother does a little gasp. "They asked me if it was okay, and I said yes, because… well, I didn't want to be the bad guy," I explain. "But I realized that I still have feelings for Tom, so today I started flirting with him again, but I feel like I'm breaking a rule. Karen and Tom are together, so I shouldn't flirt with him, right? But at the same time… I'm in love with him. I don't know what to do."

My mom sighs. "Your life is an even bigger mess than mine," she jokes. "If you really love him, if you're absolutely sure… then I would try to get to know him again. I wouldn't flirt, but I would just become his friend again. Then… just hope they'll break up. If they don't… then I'm sorry."

"That's your great form of advice? Wait and hope?" I complain.

"Yes, it is. I'm sorry I can't give you good news, but it's the way life is, Emma. If it doesn't work out, then it's fate. It means you're meant to meet someone better," she says, and it actually cheers me up a little.

"Thanks, mom," I say. "I really need less drama in my life."

"Yeah," my mother agrees. "You do."