Catching dreams

Johanna sighed and looked outside the window. It was snowing heavily and her mood was not the best. She looked at her yellow-green budgie and asked him casually: "Pikachu, how are you today?" he chirped back joyfully, but as soon as he saw the snowflakes he flapped his wings scared and jumped agitatedly from one bar to the other. "Oh, Pikachu! Don't worry! Those are just snowflakes. You'll be fine! They won't attack you and there also aren't any birds harmed outside!"

She then prepared some sandwiches and continued reading a novel she started last week, about two people, who loved each other, but were kept apart by different circumstances.

A message popped up on messenger on her computer that was installing a program.

Josh: "How are you, sweetheart?"

Johanna: "I am not that fine, just had that exam I was so afraid of. Now I am convinced I am going to fail it! How about you?"

Josh: "I am awful too. Just found out I failed two exams L"

Johanna: "That sucks. I am sorry."

Josh: "Don't worry though. I am convinced you'll pass that exam. What subject was it?"

Johanna: "English phonetics."

Josh: "Don't worry. You're a smart girl. You are going to pass it next time J"

Johanna: "Thanks. You'll pass yours too. Don't beat yourself up if you did not pass them the first time. Engineering is hard and not for the faint of heart."

Josh: "Not sure about that though. Everyone and their mom seem to be learning faster than I do. I feel so stupid."

Johanna: "It does not matter if you get there first. All that matters is that you get there."

Josh: "Yeah, maybe. But I don't want to feel like a loser."

Johanna: "Well, losers don't even bother to try. I don't think you qualify as a loser."

Josh: "If you say so..."

Johanna: "Yes. I strongly believe that."

Josh: "Do you ever worry about your future?"

' Johanna: "Yes. Sometimes I do."

Josh: "About what more specifically?"

Johanna: "My eyes. The fact is that one day my condition may worsen. The fact that sometimes I feel like a burden to other people. The fact that there's not much I can control regarding my disease and it's a rolling dice game whether my vision gets worse."

Josh: "So sorry to hear that. L However you should know here in Canada people with a vision disability live pretty well. You can receive disability benefits for visual disorders here."

Johanna: "Maybe. Still, it would have been great if I could see well and I did not need anything at all and I would have been able to navigate life happily, peacefully by myself. Also, I went to a gazillion doctors. No one can help since it is a hereditary disease and there's no cure at the moment."

Josh: "Wait. I know that feeling. It's just like going to a therapist. You think you'll feel better afterward, but you don't."

Johanna: "Kind of. You receive guidance, but normally you have to do the work. But on my part, there is not much I can do to change things. I feel stuck. And the worst thing is that most of the time I feel alone. Not many people understand what I am going through. Sometimes I feel life's handed me a hat that's too big for my head to carry."

Josh: "What can you do about it… We're alone in this world. But let's not lose hope… One day maybe there will be a cure for your disease and everything will just seem a bad dream you woke up from."

Johanna: "Maybe. But it's hard to believe the future will change when every time I've been to an ophthalmologist I get told there's no cure and I should just get used to the idea that this is what the rest of my life is going to be like."

Josh: "Hug."

Johanna: "Hug"

*********

Johanna was walking down the street and went to buy some burgers. It was a beautiful spring day. The warm spring breeze stroked her face and the city finally reclaimed its power, as trees blossomed and people were flocking to the parks.

"Hey, how are you, boo?" Katherine, her friend opened up her arms and joyfully hugged her as soon as she saw her at the park entrance. "I'm wonderful. How about you?" "I am ok too. Can't complain either. Aww, someone has red cheeks and smiles a lot!" "Someone was hit by Cupid's arrow," the other friend, Clarissa intervened.

"Yeah, one could say that!" Johanna replied shyly. "I am dying for ice cream. Care to join me?" "Sure, why not!" Katherine shrugged her shoulders. Johanna bought vanilla and strawberry ice cream, while the other two got two chocolate ice creams.

"How's life been going for you two? I feel like we haven't seen each other in ages." Katherine replied: "Not much. Just chilling. But I feel like there's so much else I need to do and keep postponing: I need to put money aside, clean my apartment and take care of my skin, body, and overall health. I just got some kittens. They're so cute. Want to see a picture of them?" "Sure!" The kitten was grey and striped, while the other was white and had black spots and its muzzle looked as if it had a heart on it due to the way the spots appeared.

"Aww, so cute. I bet you're a good momma for them now. How about you, Clarissa? Do you have any news?" "Well, except for work and a lot of over hours I've worked so I can pay my credit for the house off not much. I met a guy and he seems to be what I wished for, but we'll see how it goes long term."

"So happy for you!" Johanna replied. "But how about you? Tell us more about your boyfriend. We've been dying to hear more." Johanna took a deep breath. Many people love to talk about themselves all day long, pride in their achievements, their new car, pet, or whatever made them happy. She was more of a low-key person, rarely shared photos on social media. If there was something she was proud or happy about, she kept it to herself. To her, the most important thing was that she was happy with the life she lived instead of projecting outwardly a happy life and expecting validation from other people. Attention is nice, but respect lasts longer.

"Well, we know each other since kindergarten since we were five. We were friends for a while, then he came and visited me from Canada. I didn't expect that and it made me happy to finally meet him face to face!"

Katherine replied: "Wow, that's so cool! Who would have thought that you'd meet up again later in life?" " "He crossed an ocean to see you! That's so romantic! No guy crossed the ocean to see me!"

"Yeah, it is nice!" then she sighed thinking about the fact that she's=d love to be in his arms now and can't due to the distance and a lump appeared in her throat. "What did kissing and hugging and making love feel like after so many years in which you did not see each other? Didn't it feel awkward?" Clarissa curiously inquired. "It felt like home."

They sat down on the grass close to the lakeshore. Few ducks were swimming around, another one just caught a fish and ate it, the water was clear and cherry blossom smell hit Johanna's nose reminding her of childhood. She used to play with Josh in the garden of kindergarten and had far fewer worries than now. It's weird how much we want to grow up thinking that at the end of our childhood, adulthood comes with a lot of freedom, forgetting that each age group has its joys and problems. Probably sometimes the best thing is to enjoy the present moment fully and appreciate it before it becomes a memory.

"What's the matter?" Katherine asked her. "It's just…How do you do it with your boyfriend? I mean how can you do the long-distance relationship?" She sighed: "It's about faith and teamwork. It's not easy at all. Just like in every relationship, compromise is needed. Also, you both need to be on the same page regarding plans for the future, which need to be discussed and determined ahead of time. I am not going to lie: being in a long-distance relationship is not easy at all."

"Have you discussed with him yet when you'll move to him?' "Yeah. At the moment he has some urgent family issues he cannot avoid." Katherine answered. Johanna changed the subject: "You said we were going to have a picnic. Let's have one! That's the reason we came here!"

Katherine brought a blue picnic cloth. She laid it on the grass and took the meatballs she cooked out, while Clarissa took out some biscuits and orange juice and Johanna brought some chips and biscuits. After munching on the snacks, Clarissa offered to take some great pictures of Johanna: "I am going to be your photograph and shoot the best pics any man has ever seen!" She took a picture of Johanna sitting on the grass and a few of her standing. "Wow, you kept your promise. I look great in the photos! You should have worked as a photographer!'" Johanna laughed and complimented her