CHAPTER 2: WOULD YOU STAY?

I stayed away for days. I wanted to run from my thoughts. I wanted to escape reality but then we all know that the truth will always find us.It'll haunt us until we have nothing to do but to just accept it. So, even if it is hard i decided to face the truth I realized that I can't run forever and it's better to just face it now. When I got home from disappearing I texted Bria to meet me at our favorite cafe at 6pm. It was 5:35 and i just lay there watching the clock at my wall waiting for it's hands to strike at 6. The cafe was just a walking distance from our house so i decided to go there at exactly 6pm because i know my girlfriend she would always come late and when i say 6, it's 6:30 for her that silly girl.

6pm came and i decided to go already. When i reached the place, i was just about to enter when i saw her sitting at our usual spot so i checked the time in my phone. I thought i came so late but when i saw the time it was just 6:15. I stared at her from there, she was staring blankly at the table with her head down I have no idea what's running inside her mind but im pretty sure she had a hint that i already knew the truth that she don't want me to know. I heaved a sigh as i made my way towards her and when she saw me coming, she smiled at me, her usual sweet smile that could take all of my worries away. I hope it still work for me that day I wish her smile could just take all of the pain i was feeling but it never did. The pain i was feeling was just to strong that even her could not take it away. "Hey, I missed you where have you been you moron. you didn't even told me where were you" she hissed i just smiled at her " so, now you know the feeling of being ghosted huh?" i replied that made her punch me on the shoulders. "I'm serious Kane. Where have you been the last three days? You got us all so worried." she said and i can see the sincerity in her eyes and i can't stand seeing her that way so i hugged her tight then she hugged me back. "I'm sorry baby I did't meant to make you worried. i just didn't know what to do. I was so scared and confused so i ran away, i'm sorry. She pulled back from our hug and cupped my face. "Hey is there anything you're not telling me? Why are you scared and confused? What happened?" she worriedly asked. I can't fathom the fact that i'm hurting because of her 'cause i know she would be hurt if she knew that i was hurting because of her and i didn't want that. I can't stand seeing her hurt but i had no choice. I had to tell her i want to ask why? Why did she had to keep it from me and is she even planning to tell me the truth and if yes, when? i have a mind full of questions that only her can answer. I heaved a deep sigh and gathered all the courage in me to ask her and to finally tell her that i knew it. "I was lost. I tried to run away from the truth that's why i disappeared but the truth keeps on coming for me and i knew i can never escape it so i decided to came back and talk to you about it." i started. "But now that you're here in front of me, i can't find the strenght to tell you." i added with my voice breaking. I saw a tear escape her eyes. She was crying. My heart breaks seeing the woman i love crying in front of me. I wipe her tear off "shh, don't cry baby you'll just making me even sad." i said trying to calm her. she sniffed before looking at me straightly in the eyes. "You already knew that's why you left right? I wan to pretend that I'm clueless about you knowing but I can't. I'm sorry i didn't meant to keep this from you. I was just scared and I didn't really know how am i going to tell you. i'm sorry" she said in between her sobs. "Shh don't cry baby, it's fine i understand and it's not your fault stop crying now baby" i told her but i was just about to cry to but i held my tears back. I know that i would only make her feel worse if I cried so I held back.

I knew everything because of her sister Aemie. It was Tuesday and that was the day of our presentation in our major subject. I and Bria were architecture students and we are tasked to sketch our dream house by our professor so we agreed to draw the same design of house since we have the same dream house and that would be our house in the future. Tuesday came but she didn't attend our classes i never saw her at the campus the whole day and that made me mad. I was mad because she promised to present with me and i was really looking forward to that day but she didn't attend our class so i decided to go to her house I was getting annoyed by her sudden disappearances and I wanted to comfront her. But when i got to their house only her sister was there and as usual, she's not home. I wanted to just left and find her wherever she was but her sister offered me to come inside and i thought I would look like rude if i refuse so i just follow her inside the house. When we got inside she told me to sit at the couch in the living room and asked me if i want any drinks but i told her i'm fine. "I know why you're here. She didn't attend her classes again didn't she?" she said out of nowhere. "Uhmm, yeah that's why i decided to come here hoping that she's here but as i expected she's not" i said a little bit shy and disappointed. " I know i'm not in the right place to tell you this but I can't stand seeing you hurt that way, Kane. You know you're like a brother to me already. Confused of what she said, i asked her "what do you mean" and what she said next struck me. Bria had a cancer, not just a normal way but a critical one. Bria had a brain tumor and according to her sister it was critical and only few people survived from it. She told me they found out during vacation when they were in La Union and Bria couldn't accept it that's why she keep on disappearing because the pain was unbearable and that there would be days that she got tired of pretending that everything is fine so she leaves. That was the day that that i found out about the truth. Her sister said she doesn't want me to know because she doesn't wanna hurt me but i don't know maybe if i never knew, i would still be hurt with her actions.

She was crying hard as i told her everything and this time i can't control her i can't make her stop.I saw some people inside were even looking at us already. We we're making a scene but i didn't care. I hugged her tight to make her feel that she's did nothing wrong and it's fine that it's not her fault 'cause it's really not. She faced me and look at me straight in my eyes. " I know that there is a big possibility that i won't get there you know, the dream house our plans and staying with you as we grow old." she said in between sobbing. "Hey don't say that" my voice broke. Deep down i know that she's right but no i won't accept it, i can't. " You know that could happen, Kane. But i don't want to do that to you. I don't want you to sacrifice that future for the little hope of me surviving this. I want you to be happy even if it's no longer with me. Just seeing you happy will make me thank God for existing. I want you to find someone who can stay with you and build a family with you 'cause i can never do that" she said her voice breaking. I did not notice that I was already crying. Tears rolled down my face and I can't explain the excruciating pain i was feeling. "You know that there's no way I can do that baby. i can't love anyone else other than you. yYou know i can't so please stop saying that" i said while crying. She held my hand this time. " Staying with me will just pain you Kane. I can't be sure about anything I don't know if I can even be there in the future we dreamed. Staying with me is just a torture" she convinced me. No, I can't no matter how hard and painful it is, I will always stay 'cause it will always be more painful to leave. " No, I will stay no matter what happens Bria. I will always stay no matter what because i love you so damn much, So i will stay so stop pushing me away, baby" i said with finality.