The ship was sailing fast and I was standing above it helplessly. What would Lucien do if he was in my place? He would probably pick a fight with Shane and kill him. Why was I unable to do it? I don't have any feelings for him except pity. He is an asshole period. But I don't want to just kill him. Killing Shane won't make any difference. I had killed Igor and it made a difference. I wanted to kill him not for the sake of it. I wanted to do it only if it meant something and there was no other way. It is hard for others to understand. I'm only beginning to understand myself.