1 Home sweet home

A/N:

Little warning the story contains depictions of drunk/alcohol abuse, mental health issues, a big age difference, a lot of swearing and sexsual content between two men. 

(Any artwork I use for this story is drawn by me so please don't use them without permission.)

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A loud bang made Ed jump up from his couch.

His heart started to hammer painfully his chest and memories of his fallen comrades flashed before his eyes. There corpses mangled and burned beyond recognition.

He rubbed his forehead and tried to suppress the images that he wished so desperately he could just forget.

Then he took a few calming breaths, just like the doctor had advised him to do.

It seemed to work at least until there was another bang. Ed flinched and looked in the direction of the noise.

It most definitely had come from the apartment next door, what surprised him because since the old Mrs. Winter had died four months ago the apartment had been empty.

"Ofcourse new neighbors." Ed mumbled to himself and shook his head.

He could just hope they were just as quiet and reclusive as Mrs. Witer, even though that maybe wouldn't be such a good thing. After all it had taken almost two weeks for the smell to get so bad for anybody to notice that she was dead.

The thought of it made Ed feel nauseated. It wasn't even really the memory of the smell that hit him so hard but instead the realization that he most likely would end up the same way.

Since his mother's death two years ago he had nobody really anymore and when it came to friends, well Ed had never really been that social to begin with. Sure he had a two buddies that he hung out with sometimes but he doubted that even they would try to look for him if he stopped going to the pub.

He grabbed his pack of cigarettes and a lighter from the coffetabbel and went onto his balcony, in desperate need for some fresh air to clear his mind. After lighting one he took a long drag from it and leaned over the railing to look down.

From the 9 floor everything seemed so small and unimportant.

Ed sometimes hated it living so high up, specially when the elevator wasn't working but then again there were those moments where it seemed that nothing could touch him in his fortress of solitude, high above everything else and he loved those moments. They were the most peaceful.

But before Ed could really enjoy his moment he got disturbed by a young voice from the balcony next to his. Even though he couldn't see the boy because of the concrete wall between them, Ed was still very sure that the guy was probably only in his late to mid teens because there was still a slight hint of a high pitched cracking in his voice.

"Dad seriously this apartment sucks! It's totally gross!" The kid whined.

Ed shook his head, even though the boys words weren't directed towards him, he still found it very rude.

So what if the fourteen store high, soviet style, concrete slap building had seen better days and that there were some problems here and there? It was still definitely better than some other places Ed had called his home over the years.

"Please Dad can't I live with you instead? I promise I won't cause any problems. You won't even notice that I'm there! Please..."

There was long awkward pause but then, without a warning the kid yelled "Fuck you!" and threw the phone out, making it shatter on the pavement down below.

A muffled sobbing was all that Ed could hear from the other balcony. For a moment he even contemplated if he should say something or ask if the boy was okay but then he remembered that it was non of his business and he probably shouldn't even have listened in on there conversation in the first place.

He just took the last long drag from his cigarette and put it out in the already over flowing ashtray.

This was exactly why Ed never had wanted kids. He already had problems dealing with adults but children, they were even worse for him.

It also didn't help that he always had doubted that he could even be a good father. He was just to much like his own dad, even if he hated to admit it, it had become way to obvious by now to deny it.

The only thing that he didn't seem to have in common with that old, useless drunkard was his temperament.

Because Ed was way to much like a rock.

A boring, cold, immovable object that nobody ever seemed to noticed, unless they stumbled into him.