We Just Wanted Food

We were settling in great and I was starting to like the neighborhood. There were some girls that lived across the street from me. Stacy and Charmaine, they were pretty cool and if I got tired of the boys I hung out with them. They were about my age, but they were always on bullshit to. So my time with them was limited. Stacy was the party type, she was sixteen like me but she smoked weed like a champ. She also drank a lot, while I didn’t really touch the stuff. He mom was like sixty and she was sickly so she got away with a lot.

Charmaine was just angry most days. We had never had issues, thank god. However she argued and fought all the time with everyone else. She even fought Stacy last week. She didn’t fight fair either. She was always trying to bust somebody head or something. She was skinny but she was strong and crazy. Like a female Smalls, her motto was ‘anybody can get it’. She made me nervous only because I didn’t want beef where I lived anymore.

I had finally straightened out my new room and was ready to invite my cousins over. Yeah, it had taken me two months to straighten up. Mostly because I had been hanging out with the guys. It was now a favorite pastime, there were always doing something. It felt different from my bond with people where I used to live.

The first cousin to every visit and spend the night was Niecy. We had pretty much grown up in the same house. We were second cousins. My mom was her mom’s auntie, but her mom was older than mine. So when my grandma had my mom she already had grown children, who were having their own babies. My mom is the youngest of twelve. So they had grown up more like sisters. As a result Niecy and I were sister cousins.

Niecy was tall and skinny. She was from the east side witch is basically Illinois, but everyone just calls it East St. Louis. She was sixteen to and fast. According to her, she has already had sex, with multiple people. I had no problem letting her know I had not with anyone. She had looked at me strange then, like I was the weird one. Peer pressure was not something that bothered me though and I let her know that she was the strange one.

*****

One particular weekend she came over and we went to get Chinese food. On the way back, we ran into some boys trying to talk to us. They were flirting but I didn’t feel it. My cousin Niecy was all for talking to them, not that I was hating or nothing she just had no idea how my dudes would react to seeing me walking down the street with these dudes. They would not like it. Last time Christian stomped the dude out, and I felt bad since I knew dude from school. He had just been a friend. In moments like that, the guys never listened to me.

To appease her, I agreed that they could walk us to the corner of my street and that’s it and only for my cousin. So for two blocks I was paranoid. I kept looking over my shoulder and I tried walking ahead of them so hopefully I could duck off if need be. I was praying, and hoping that we didn’t run into any of the boys especially Christian. While I was bugging out Neicy was acting like a dumb hoe. Twirling her hair and giggling like crazy. I had nothing against her for being a hoe, that’s her business, but I just hated dumb hoes. She was also totally disregarding my eye contact and body language. Her eyes told me she thought I was over reacting, she had no idea.

When we got to my street I stopped and looked down it to my house. Not a soul in sight, I finally let out the breath I wasn’t aware I had been holding. If they made a quick getaway now we would be good.

“Niecy say bye to your lil friend get his number or something, seriously we need to shake out.” I said, keeping my eyes on my house. I sucked my teeth when one of the boys came to talk to me.

“What the rush babe, you got somewhere to be?” Said stupo number two, the one who had been pestering me the whole walk, even after seeing that he was getting on my god fearing nerves he kept talking. I didn’t even know him and I knew that I hated him, plus he was ugly as fuck. Was he really trying to calm me down?

“I’m really trying to help yawl broke ass out, if my boyfriend, or my brothers see yawl, yawl gone be over with.” I said opting for straight facts. Sugar coating wouldn’t work for these guys. Then again neither did facts, apparently.

“We aren’t scared of no body. Not your brothers and not your weak ass dude.” The same guy said. He was dark skinned with a box fade. Small beady eyes stared at me as I stared him down. These mother fuckers had a death wish. I didn’t, I was done playing this game.

“Whatever lil boy.” I said stepping away. I didn’t want to leave my cousin, but if she didn’t follow right now, that’s what would happen. “Niecy, I’m out I got to live with them, when you can just go home so you know where I’m at.” I said and I turned on my heels and started walking up the street. Guess who was right behind me? The damn fools, they can’t say I didn’t warn them.

Right on que Christian stuck his head out the second floor window. Did I mention his hair had got like hella long, he looked super cute with braids but when he rocked a fro like he was now, he seemed more menacing, more ‘I’m that dude’. I had enjoyed many day and nights plying with his thick hair, it was a favorite feature of mine.

“Yo, who the fuck is that walking with yawl?” Christian yelled.

I just shrugged my shoulders, smiled and pointed to Niecy. I was trying to convey that I was not involved. However I knew it looked bad. Two girls, two guys. It looked like a hookup. In the back of my mind I hoped Christian knew I would never be dumb enough to bring a guy right in his face. I tried to explain, but it was too late, he was pissed.

Before I knew what was happening he had jumped straight out that second story window and landed on his feet. Sigh, he was so fly. No shirt to be seen just his muscles glistening in the street lights, he had on low rider cargo shorts and no shoes, just crispy white socks. How the hell did he land in them socks?

I started to walk towards him until I looked at his face. His chocolate browns were absolutely glacial and he had his hand clinched. Okay....... jealous much. He was totally pissed, so like my Christian. I instinctively knew I had to calm him down, but the guys weren’t helping. They were talking big shit. They saw one guy, and me. Unbeknown to them there was a whole fucking crew in my house. Christian was taking slow, deliberate steps towards the guys, he paid me no mind. His focus on them.

So I started for him again, but before I got to him, he let out the call. It sounds somewhat like screeching tires and a high pitch whistle, “SKIRUUUURT.” And all I could think was ....damn. They really should have stopped at the corner. The situation was no longer in my control.

Now Niecy was trying to get them boys to go. It would seem they were happier challenging Christian. That enthusiasm they had lasted all of the thirty seconds it took for my boys to come charging down the stairs. I mean I would have heard that if I was still at the corner. I looked towards the gangway to my house, knowing they would be coming out of the back. Christian had hit boy number two with a right that sent him backwards, he quickly got up and, finally, ran although but he was too late.

Out came Joey, Dale, Reese, Todo, Charlie, Smalls, and Montel. A few of them took off on foot after the dudes, while Dale and a couple more jumped in his Thunderbird and took off at high speeds, with Reese hanging out the passenger side chunking up his hood. Those boys would probably run the next time they saw me and I really didn’t think Niecy would be getting that call. I hoped the guys didn’t do too much damage, but I knew they were going to kick their asses. I glared at Niecy as I went inside to wait for them.

*****

A couple of days later we were all on Potomac, a street not too far from my house. We were chilling, sitting on the porch of the homeboy Zale. Zale was deadly when it came to free styling and him and the home girl Leesha was tearing it up. None of the brothers were here today, just Me, Zale, Christian, and Leesha.

Christian had been tense since they had chased down those guys. They had all come back about thirty minutes later laughing. I had sat in the porch waiting for them to get back. Christian’s knuckles had been bruised and bloody. So were his socks and shorts. I hadn’t asked any questions. I had taken him to the smaller bathroom and cleaned his hands. He later changed and we continued on with our lives. No one talked about what had happened.

Today I sat on the stoop, on Christian’s lap, giggling while he tickled me every chance he got. I was trying very hard to listen to what they were rapping about but he kept bothering me. So I turned on him and started tickling him to. At first he tried to act like it didn’t bother him and then, he started bugging up, laughing. It was a nice change from the silent treatment I had been getting lately.

I still hated his teeth and made a mental note every day, that if he didn’t get them fixed I would personally see to it. That aside I can well and truly say that I was in love for the first time and I didn’t know how my world would be if I didn’t get to see him every day. I shook my head as he laid on the ground now still laughing, seriously he was worse than Elmo. All I could think was how was it that I had found the toughest, most sensitive, gangster in the hood to fall for and have him fall right back. All over my shoe laughing. Literally.

I shook my head at him and helped him up, to the porch, and we were soon joined by Zale, and Leesha.

“So, what’s up for today yawl?” Asked Leesha. She was tall for a girl and she was sporty. She dressed like a dude and acted like one most of the time. I liked her, she was good peoples.

“I want to go to the carnival.” Zale said, while playing with Leesha’s crazy hair. It was all over her head. She and Zale weren’t together, at least I didn’t think so. Sometimes I wondered thought. They were both old friends of Christian, he had introduced us a while back. I had liked them both immediately. They had his back the long way.

Not too long ago I had gotten into a fight with this boy named Tony. I had actually beat his ass, but Christian hadn’t liked the fact that I fought a boy at all. He had hunted Tony down. It had taken a few days, but when he found him, Tony had like four guys with him. Intent on his target Christian had knocked Tony out with that one hitter quitter he had. The guys had tried to jump him in return.

Zale and Leesha had come to help him. They had escorted him passed the guys who were trying to jump him. They hadn’t bussed a move. Zale was armed with a shot gun and Leesha had two twenty-twos. I had heard about it after the fact, but they had his back. So they were cool.

“The one on Meramec?” Christian asked.

“Damn right I’m down,” I said hopping up. “Just let me get my purse.”

I made a move to go into the house to get my purse and was quickly stopped by Christian, he held up his finger to his lips, in a gesture to be quiet. I frowned but did what he said. I had absolutely no idea what was going on, and then I heard it. The sound struck me with fear. The sounds I heard was a hushed hiss whisper, coming from the gang way between Zale’s house and his Neighbors. Followed by the unmistakable sound of a gun being cocked back. My heart skipped a beat as I realized we were the only people outside.

Christian moved his head to the left, indicating that we should run that way. We had to get away from the house, I understood. Zale’s sister and her four babies was in there as well as his elderly granny. I nodded my head and then we were moving away from the house. When I heard a voice that would haunt me forever.

“Yeah you not so tough now, bitch ass nigga,” The voice said, and I knew who it was in that instant, I knew that voice. It was asshole number two, or maybe number one, but I knew his voice. He obviously wanted revenge.

I heard the shots felt the heat of the bullet flying by my face as I ran for cover, and then they stopped and so did I. I was now in the gangway across the street they were reloading and I didn’t see any of my crew. I started to take slow steps backwards deeper into the gangway. I kept my eyes on both guys, so far no one had been hit.

“Where you think you going bitch. You the one I really want, your wack ass brothers put my eye out, I’ll be lucky if I ever see again.” The boy cried.

“Fuck you,” I said, shaking on the inside but tough on the outside, “I told you to leave before they saw you.” I yelled back as I ran through my options for escaping.

He lifted the gun and pointed it directly at me, “well you won’t be seeing shit now either, nightie night, Bitch.”

I didn’t close my eyes. If I was going to die here I wanted to die looking him in his face to remember in my afterlife. That a simple walk for food had cost me my life. This selfish bastard was the reason. He was hesitating though, which told me he didn’t really want to do this, but he felt like he had to. I vowed right then and there that if, by some miracle I made it out of this I would take his life. I would take his life and I would not hesitate.

I found myself wishing the boys had killed him. This was how it went in the hood now. Things were changing, people didn’t simply fight anymore. Everyone wanted to kill. Killing kept shit like this from happening.

I felt rather than heard a shift from somewhere in front of the building me. I hoped it was friend and not foe. Dude saw him to because his face got hard, like he was pissed all over again and his fucked up eye was even uglier. In spite of the danger I wanted to laugh, where the hell was my trusty dusty boyfriend? I was about to be shot, dammit.

His hands clinched and he pulled the trigger, and then I closed my eyes. I waited for impact, but none came. I opened them when I was hit in the face by something wet, slimy, and warm. I looked down to see that I was covered in blood, but I knew it wasn’t mine. The dude stood before me, shock apparent on his face as he dropped the gun. I looked down to where the gun had landed, and there lay Zale, he had been shot in the head. He must have jumped in front of me, he must have saved my life. He had saved my life.

Time slowed as I ran towards him, oblivious to the danger still very present. I dropped to my knees and put his head in my lap, and started to cry. I saw the gun and pushed it away from us towards the house. I didn’t care that he was leaking all over me, I didn’t care that the dude that did it was still standing over me. I heard a scream, and saw Zale’s sister come out of the house followed by his granny. They were both screaming hysterically.

I looked up at the dude who did this and shook my head slowly this time. Zale was dead, he was dead and this ugly ass, fake ass, soft as cotton ass bastard had done it. It just wasn’t right. Zale was one of the realest, why him. He had nothing to do with the situation.

I stared at that young man until I saw death. I wondered why he was still here. The next thing I knew, I heard sirens in the background, and he looked scared as if he was going to run. “Don’t move.” I said slowly. I knew there was nothing to keep him here. I prayed the tone of my voice would keep him rooted. I didn’t want him to get away.

He froze and then looked scared at something over my shoulder. I turned to see what had spoked him. There stood Zale’s sister, same gun, but her face was filled with pain and disgust. She didn’t blink either when she unloaded on dude. She got closer with every shot until the gun was empty. I felt nothing but satisfaction as he hit the ground.

Suddenly Christian was there, he took the gun from her and disappeared again. The ambulance arrived and declared dude dead on the scene. Zale however, they found a pulse. My dude had took one to the head for me and he might still make it. I prayed he made it. When he came through I was going to make sure he was good forever I owe him my life.