Chapter 12

Once Victor Walsh was convicted for a crime he didn't commit, being the only one left in his mother's world Zeus stepped up. At just the mere age of fourteen he allowed himself to be immersed in the world that came with Hell's Kitchen. It hadn't been easy to enter that life, once word spread about his father's downfall and you add in the fact Zeus was a mixed breed, danger was sure to follow. But Sonny Giovanni placed Zeus under his wing and vouched for him to everyone who held doubts about his father's loyalty and once he proved himself it was only natural that by the age of twenty-three Zeus took a blood oath and joined the Family. It was completely unprecedented to have someone like him be a part of the mafia and rise up the ranks from a mere foot soldier to a boss at just thirty-four.

And he had made it clear to me that first night we spent in each other's arms how imperative Sonny was to him and that he owed him a lot. It had only made me intrigued to meet him at some point when I was prepared. After a good night's sleep I was feeling particularly jovial that morning when I waltzed in his spotless kitchen and took a seat by a stool to watch him. He greeted me turning around wearing what I called even now his signature smirk meant to break hearts. He moved towards me and bent down to place a chaste kiss on my cheek, increasing the sparks coursing through my body. And just when I felt myself believing that we'd settle into a quiet morning the sound of another voice intruded our bubble popping it. "So this is what you left the meeting so early for?" Like I said before I truly wanted to meet the Alpha of the family at a later stage but I found myself meeting him a lot sooner and when I turned to find grey eyes similar to the color of steel watching us I found myself growing tense.

The one and only Sonny, who I would come to learn preferred wearing formal attire most of the time, already in his late fifties he had seen a lot in his life being born into that world of wise guys operating regardless of the targets on their backs. From the outside he looked like a well-dressed gentleman who had a fancy job with a nice corner office but he was more than meets the eye for he was a man who could snap necks whether it was in human or wolf form. Zeus stood back up to his full height and I watched his face drop to a neutral expression. "Elle, this is Sonny. He's –"

"Family," he interrupted moving further into the kitchen, "I'm practically his father at this point. Which is why I'm surprised he hasn't mentioned you at all to me," he muttered narrowing his gaze on me and though I gulped at the intense look he was giving me I did my best to plaster on my best smile I greeted him reaching my hand out towards his. He stared at it for a while and just when I was starting to feel even more nervous he put me of my misery and shook it. The cold feel of it made me wince slightly. "Pleasure to meet you," he replied releasing my hand much to my relief and I observed the manner in which they interacted feeling awkward at the way Sonny chastised him for losing focus by frolicking around with me. The attack was one I would never forget no matter how much I tried to wash away the moment that would make anyone cringe the way I did especially with the way the older man showed no care for me being in the room. Zeus quickly ushered him out of the kitchen whilst throwing an apologetic look my way leaving me to process the fact without being given a chance to explain myself or spend enough time with Sonny, he already wasn't a fan of mine. Faint voices filled the atmosphere whilst I busied myself with finishing off the eggs he had been preparing whilst trying to calm the anxiety swirling around. Deep down I knew I shouldn't have cared whether or not Sonny even liked me, but for some time I did. And when Zeus returned after escorting him to the door he tried to make me feel better. "Don't worry about him, he's just usually on guard when it comes to the people I allow into my life."

"You sound like me when I gave an excuse about Donovan when you and I both know he simply doesn't like you," I replied turning to look up at him. He rolled his eyes taking a seat before me, "With Donovan that shit's different, his protection of you goes far beyond just that of a friend."

And the second he mentioned that it was my turn to roll my eyes, an action he didn't seem to appreciate considering his eyes narrowed on me. "He's always been like that and don't try change the subject. It's clear Sonny doesn't like me which is really messed up since he doesn't know me."

"I was only pointing out what I've noticed and I know it may seem as if Sonny's cold but when my father went to prison he really stepped up. Taught me the things my dad should have. Its cause of him I stayed out of any unnecessary trouble. So I'll admit I have been a little distracted even when it comes to conducting business and he fears… it's due to you," he sighed running a hand down his face, I frowned taking in his words knowing that if that was the case Sonny was simply reacting from a place of just being concerned. "And am I the reason for your distraction?" Once I allowed the question out of my mouth a grin formed on his lips, the sight of them stretching reminding me once again how they had been on mine eliciting a blush once he also said, "You have bewitched me body and soul, my little gazelle."

"I can't believe you're using Jane Austen to make me weak," I murmured shaking my head in an attempt to rid myself of the way my brain lost its place in its functionality. Regaining my composure I went on to say, "You're the one who came to me, remember?" he chuckled lightly basking in sheer amusement at having affected me. "But honestly," he muttered looking at me seriously, "just give him time to warm up to you."

Nodding my head in understanding the sound of another set of footsteps were heard and it wasn't long before I saw Daniel march into the kitchen stopping short when he noticed us. "You guys should learn the concept of knocking," Zeus groaned coming to stand beside me. "And miss this," Daniel chuckled motioning between us, "never. But there's an urgent matter that needs our attention pertaining to that gan –"

He snapped his mouth shut at the fiery gaze Zeus threw his way and it took no time for me to see that his anger was in relation to his reluctance to expose more of his business to me. Feeling pity for Daniel who looked at the ground in embarrassment at the slip up I decided to leave the room and quickly poked his side, "Don't be mean. Eventually I was going to see more of your world," I mumbled reaching up to place a soft kiss on his cheek. He relaxed closing his eyes to calm himself down before reopening them to nod his head. And without another word I left despite a part of me trying to convince me to linger close by and hear more because secretly I was hoping whatever the issue was would bring him no harm. But I knew given wolves' advance hearing he'd hear me eavesdropping.

However, that was what I had unintentionally asked for or at least accepted to invade my space when it did even if I was bound to experience discomfort or worry from it.

***

It had been days since I spent that night with him and I still found myself at a loss of words yet giddy at the thought of feeling the strength in his embrace that offered solace from the world around us. Marcie had bombarded me with questions that had me slightly dizzy from the constant demand that I admit what was going on with her cousin. Even Ms. Friedman continued to look at me strangely whenever she happened to mention her nephew. At that time Donovan and I's relationship had been a little rocky.

But I came to realize that not all your friends will be in support of who you choose to keep in your company and I was always taught to follow my gut instincts. For your gut is the one thing that will never steer your wrong and for some reason I knew that as far as my association with Zeus went, it was only right I honor the feelings I had. And those feelings allowed me to openly show glee at seeing him waiting outside the library after I came from a lecture on campus.

Dressed to impress, I wasn't the least bit surprised when a number of students glanced his way. He wasn't particularly hard to miss considering how he towered over most and once I was an arm's reach away he took my bag slinging it onto his shoulder, "I thought we were in agreement you'd only wear my clothes," he smirked, sucking my teeth playfully the reminder once again of that night making me grin widely like an idiot I immediately replied, "You still have some work to do before putting such a claim." His eyes darkened significantly and he reached out lifting up my hand up to his lips making my heart haphazardly trip along the steps it ordinarily took, "I'll put in the work." And as the words settled into the atmosphere he kept his hand wrapped around mine and proceeded to lead me across campus towards the vehicle parked and this time Leo was there seated in the driver's seat.

"You aren't flying solo today?"

He briefly connected his eyes with mine grinning in a manner that should be considered illegal, "I need both hands on you, Elle." And when I took a seat with him following close behind I felt my breath hitch when his shoulder lightly brushed mine when he joined me. When I thought I was finally gaining sovereignty on my emotions his hand landed on my thigh giving it a gentle squeeze extinguishing all chances of belief I had that I would still be in one piece once he was done with me.

We arrived at our destination with me fortunately still able to breathe and when I caught sight of the restaurant named Little Napoli I turned in his direction to find him smiling at me, "Figured it'd be nice if we had lunch together," he mumbled opening the door; he reached out helping me disembark from the vehicle and I observed the restaurant known for providing authentic Italian dining experiences with their meals. He grabbed my hand leading us inside to the very place he revealed in our time together was where he began dining at when he had more financial stability after becoming a captain relishing the thrill of flaunting the kind of money that many spent a lifetime acquiring. And in that role of working closely with the soldiers he began a friendship with the owner of the restaurant that came from him offering protection.

He kept me close leading us through the area, considering it was lunch time there was a buzz of activity as waiters moved about catering to the needs of the customers. Moving towards an area located upstairs that would give us a decent view of the opulent space it wasn't long before we were seated. Admittedly the smells of expensive perfumes permeating in the air and the glimpses of clothed brands on the people's backs made me feel slightly underdressed in my attire. Pulling at the sleeve of my sweater I knew I should have done a better job at keeping my thoughts from being displayed on my face when he said, "You look beautiful." And in as much as I enjoyed the pleasant feelings that emerged when he was near, I detested how much of myself became a blubbering mess. I detested how much one look from him could cause a warm fuzzy feeling to erupt inside me whilst I was reduced to my teenage self. I bit my lower lip after thanking him and the sight of his eyes dropping down to my lips, gave me a glimpse of the barbaric force lurking just below his immaculate suit.

I cleared my throat thankful my voice didn't tremor nor shake from the hormones tormenting me, "How's your day been so far?" He shook his head slowly reaching up to take a sip of his scotch, "It started off shitty but now…" he paused looking me straight in the eye, "it's perfect."

Ignoring the last comment I leaned forward curious to hear more about what everyday was like as he navigated in the world he was in, "What made it so shitty in the first place?"

"It's nothin –"

"Don't bullshit me, Zee," I cut him off, my eyes turning to slits in the process of scrutinizing the man who I had no doubt could do some serious damage to me if he desired. He clenched his jaw and I knew I should probably drop the subject but I couldn't, it's like I said before I was stubborn. "I've tried to it slide but I don't like it when you swear," he pointed out narrowing his eyes on me.

"And I don't like it when you keep shit from me," I replied wearing a bored expression and just when I thought he'd be irked by my refusal to back down he smirked, his amusement apparent. Since the last time I was in his home and I had to leave the kitchen a part of me was bothered he wasn't yet willing to tell me what was happening in his day to day life. Though I had to give him credit for opening to me about to his past, it was the vacant space of the present that had me curious since I shared more in that regard than he did. "I don't know what you want me to tell you," he stated shrugging nonchalantly.

"I don't want you to necessarily tell me every nitty-gritty detail but I do want you to feel as if you can talk to me. I know you're used to being in control but I do want you to know that with me you can… be open," I mumbled taking initiative by reaching out to place my hand atop his. He was always the one to commence the physical contact between us such that it took a lot out of me to break through the shyness I usually carried in regards to touching him. He stared down at out joined hands for a second and I could only assume the wheels were turning in his head of whether to trust me enough to tell me what was going on with him. "You first," he mumbled looking back up at me. Staring at him in confusion I tilted my head to the side silently asking him to clarify, "if you share something with me… I'll tell you. And don't tell me you don't have something you're keeping to yourself, even a puritan like you must have dark secrets."

And despite the label making me giggle I quickly grew serious at what he was requesting from me. I bit the inside of my cheeks mulling over what to say in that moment and once the thought emerged of what to tell him, I hesitated knowing that I would be unveiling the hidden insecurity that had been haunting me as of late. But if I wanted us to have open communication then I had to offer something onto the table. My mother always told me that it was always important to have good communication in any relationship which I had been also trying to do with Marcie who was slowly opening up more and more with me.

Taking a deep breath I released it along with the weight I had been carrying around in the process, "Once I started studying literature I got a job working as an intern at a publishing company during the summer," I paused looking up at him to find him watching and listening attentively which was the further encouragement I needed to go on, "it was exciting at first. And I got the exposure I thought I needed but it wound up scaring me in the process. There are so many talented people out there whose work I saw get declined and…" I shuddered at the uncomfortable feeling that settled in the deep pits of my stomach, "as much as I'm trying not to think about it. I can't help but wonder what if I'm not good enough to ever get my work accepted anywhere. I haven't even told anyone about the manuscript I've been working on because I'm scared once anyone reads it and doesn't like it that will just confirm that I'm not as good as I think I am." I concluded closing the door behind the dark room I had entered and once I said it out loud for the first time it annoyed me that I was letting that experience affect me.

But just when I felt myself crawling back from the light that showcased my doubts he grasped my hand gently and prohibited me from doing so when he gently smiled. "It's unfortunate that life will knock us down sometimes… but it's not an excuse to stop trying. Fear will always cause doubts to emerge that often push us to settle for mediocre when we deserve so much more. And you," he paused moving his eyes all over my face, "you deserve some ounce of good from this life. I want you to allow more people to see your work. Which means I want you to give me that manuscript to read," he concluded; my eyes widened turning to saucers at the request. "No, no, no," I shook my head leaning back.

"C'mon, you're the one who wanted to see more of my world. So let me see yours," he pleaded gently easing me away from my fears and I pondered the suggestion knowing that he was right, despite how much time has passed I still didn't like it when he used my own words against me. Falling short on a suitable rebuttal I sighed pinching the bridge of my nose to cope with the anxiety I felt, it had been long since I had anyone read my work and without looking at him I replied, "Fine, but now that I've revealed a part of myself. It's time you keep your end of the deal."

Glancing back up at him, he huffed rubbing his chin to gather his thoughts, he shifted in his seat finally granting me the chance to learn more about what was going on, "Okay, it's only fair," he stated clearing his throat and proceeded to unveil for the rest of that time we spent together that day what was going on. And it would be another moment that would drag me deeper into his world.