White Room.

Grace exhaled, curly white smoke bulged out from between her luscious lips.

"Now, sweetheart," she said with a slightly hoarse tone. "Tell me everything."

Yvette rested her head on a red silk pillow after drinking a gulp of red wine. She fondled the glass gently as Grace extinguished the cigarette in a brass ashtray, on which four tiny merry Buddha statuettes danced around with wise smiles on their content faces.

"So we went for a short hike on the hills. It was very natural…"

"Haven't you been anxious?"

"Of course I've been! You know me… But it passed away very clearly. It was very strange and very soothing, Grace. Like…, like both of us knew that this will work out fine, we just need to be patient and get through the early part, you know, when it's just awkward… it was very friendly, easy… natural, that's what keeps popping up in my mind, trying to describe it…"

"Was he very different than on the pics?"

"Actually, no! He was exactly like I imagined, only a bit… better. He was smiling a lot. He is nice, full of this strange, restrained emotion. He is not like I imagine the Italians, you know, he was not loud, he is not pushy, he was saying nice things but he wasn't piling up compliments like crazy. It really felt natural; like the words just flowed from his mouth with ease and passion. He was a bit reserved, almost like being a bit sorry when coming forward with something nice about me… which was very cute actually!"

"Did he turn you on?"

"A lot. After 10 minutes, I kind of wished he banged me right there with my back to one of the tree trunks."

"Yvette!" Grace laughed warmly "Is that you? I can't even recognize you. But I like the change, I admit that."

"Well, yeah, although of course, had he tried it, that would have been… inappropriate. And the place wasn't that pristine anyway…"

"Oh, of course. Chipmunks watching everywhere. I understand," said Grace smugly.

"C'mon, there were people there, walking the trails, families… I wasn't that horny, to land us both in jail. Besides…" she added, dreamily "...he took good care of me, later on."

"Aww, yeah. I can't wait for that part in the story."

"We will get there… pretty soon, to be honest!" Yvette laughed

"You… you kidding me? You had sex on your first date?"

"Soooo, there we were, walking on the trail, engaging in deep, meaningful conversation. The connection was there, it was instant. That's why I got even… aroused. It was a cascading feeling, like falling into something ever deeper, every word, every minute more reassuring than the one before, it had this certain velocity, if you know what I mean… and when I imagined where it would drag me that was why I felt I want this man, as soon as possible."

"That's pretty cool, and I'm proud that you… rode this wave, instead of, you know, get frightened and lock up. Hide away. That little retreat of yours certainly did you good! You got calmer and more confident. Proud of you, babe," said Grace and smiled at Yvette, moving herself into a cozier position, laying her head on the pillow and hanging her gaze at Yvette's face who relived the experience with Jay while looking up on the ceiling. "What was he wearing?"

"He wore this casual but cool outfit. Dark jeans, boots, a nice sand colored shirt buttoned up to his stomach, a belt below that. He has this necklace with several pendants, mythological stuff…"

"Egyptian?!"

"Puff, maybe. I don't know. I think, I forgot to ask… "

"That would be two in one, yeah. Just to be sure that Jocelyn did not accidentally divined your one lover as two different guys."

"I don't think so… but I will definitely check the pendants next time. Everything happened pretty quickly, you know… so anyway. He did not think too much about his looks, but it was just fine."

"Yeah, one thing you can leave to the Italians that they've got style."

"So, you know, it was a hot day… we got thirsty. His apartment was a ten minute drive…"

"How convenient." She laughed.

"Yeah."

"So, it was that? On the pics? The white room is his?"

Yvette gulped and nodded silently. "Yep." she added. "He is the one with the white room."

"Yvette, I'm sure that several hundreds of thousands of single American men have white seating furniture in their white walled living rooms with dark smoked glass tables. And urban families do as well. And porn studios."

"You know you're right. I do as well. I don't care, it did have a… impression on me. He gave me a glass of iced cocktail when we sat down."

"He had it all mixed up and on ice before you arrived, I bet."

"You bet."

"Thoughtful! Witty old bastard thought about seduce you into his den beforehand."

"Well, I didn't even finish the first glass when we started doing it."

"Wow. How did he… Or was it you?!"

"I don't know… well, it was him. I turned around on the sofa and I was half on my knees, I wanted to check out this tall black statue of sorts...but…"

"But in fact you just lifted your booty into full view."

"I think I did. Yeah. So he came closer, you know, to explain something about the statue. But then he grabbed my hip with one hand, and pulled me close, with her other hand on my back."

"What? Wow. What did you…?" she shifted on the edge of the bed.

"Well, he held me tight, close, and he was rock hard. That hard bulge was tightly pushed against my butt. I… I gasped; I could not say or do anything. In fact, I feared he might stop if I'm questioning him or act surprised… and I did not want him to stop, I wanted him inside me right there. So I just stayed there, shivering, wondering what comes next."

"It must have been a while for him… so what happened? Shit, this is turning me on…" she said in a low tone while using her left palm to cover her mouth.

"Thankfully, he leaned over and started kissing my back and shoulders, so… it was obvious that now we…, we're going to…"

"Have sex?" asked Grace with a wicked smile, shifting her pose under the silk blanket. Her nipples pierced her T-shirt as she was wearing only that, and panties. "You do have excellent observations, Yvette. A hard cock rubbing to your bottom and the man attached to it kissing your neck… it's a brilliant conclusion in my opinion. Sex is very likely to happen."

"Well, I made sure. I reached back out to open his belt. He got that, and removed it, while I tore down my own leggings. I was afraid my fluids would start spilling everywhere and was a bit embarrassed you know, being so wet and all. But at that point, I decided not to care."

"Oh gosh. That is filthy,." breathed Grace "I like that. Shit, this always happens when I get high. I'm practically soaked! But don't you dare stop with what happened afterwards…"

"Well, you can imagine, I think."

"If you're saying he slid inside you doggy style, before even properly kissing..., I...I…"

"You know, I knew there are many white rooms, but I felt that this is the white room the prophecy was about so, I let my instincts lead me. I never had sex with anyone on a first date, you know well, I never was into one night stands. But there I was in that room. He was exactly what I had wanted or what I had thought I wanted. I was turned on by him, by his mind, I could not help myself. All this time, I have been waiting for, this white room, wanting, searching, and I have to tell you, it was intimidating at first. I somehow felt that this was the white room. So, it was all too much, I wanted to open up and give myself to him. He wanted me badly and he went for it, that's it. He slid into me from behind so deep that I could not breathe for a minute, and when he started moving, hard, almost violent, I don't know, it was unreal. I came very soon. And many times afterwards. We've been doing it for hours. And the best was that he did not say a single word all the way through. He just dragged me here, led me there, and used me, while being gentle and caring… it was beautiful. He even handcuffed me once. That was the highpoint of the day. He handcuffed me to those big metal shelves all along the wall, and he just left me there for a while. He even left the room. I can't really describe that feeling… there was this immense trust, you know? I know, crazy, I don't care, I knew that I'm in the safest place in the world and he would do me no harm. But still, knowing that anything could happen… he could just sit in his car and pull away, leaving me there, or offer me up for the pizza guy or whatever… it was crazy but I loved every second of it. And after that, guess what, he returned and he just watched me for a while. I was facing the wall, I couldn't even see him. He did not talk and I did not ask anything, I just stood there, bare naked. I think I even needed to pee a bit, but I was too excited to break this game and remained silent. It was so humiliating and yet I felt so free. He came close after a few minutes and did me again. Gosh. It was an awesome day.

Yvette sat at her desk in the office, with large piles of accounts, tables, statistics almost burying the whole surface of the large wooden desk. The pile took the shape of a semi-circle, like a fortress wall around her laptop, and in the sanctum, a cup of tea she prepared on the tiny induction cooktop she kept in the office for exactly this purpose. It was a hot day, her blouse was unbuttoned down to her flat belly, but not because of the heat - the air conditioner was working just fine. The review she needed to complete was a boring challenge, and she could not help but fantasizing about having sex with Jay, trying out new things, pushing further, doing the extra mile, experimenting, so she touched herself every couple of hours. Just quickly and effectively, her painted nailed fingers running up on the inner side of her black stockings, below her tight miniskirt, and she flew back into the memory of his embrace in seconds again. White clouds ran through the blue sky behind her back, on the other side of the window like wild horses on endless fields.

When she finished again, she sucked in her two fingers to clean them from her moisture. She took a deep breath, drank from her tea, and turned back to her computer. She did not progress much with her report, no, her head was too full of the matters of her heart. So she started an online session with Julie-Marie, one of her most trusted Psychic Advisors. Jocelyn was on a weeklong retreat, with no internet access of course, and Yvette could not wait that long. Again, she longed for the confirmation of someone else.

"How will he know that I am his soulmate?" she asked the guide.

"He already knows. He can feel it," said Julie Marie, with her deep, radiant, soothing voice.

"I feel such a brightness coming through. I'm optimistic. And finally, I was in the white room. I never expected grandma would have been trying to prepare me for something like that…"

"You are very intuitive, Yvette. And also, part of you is not sure Jay is the one. That is why you are looking for confirmation. If you want to know if he is a soulmate of you, I can confirm that. The truth of that is burning bright like daylight."

"I feel that, too. I know he is. I also know we have several soulmates in life."

"That is also true. And he is something else as well. Something more. He is a kindred spirit. That is why you have felt instant connection. That is why both of you got immediately calm when you have finally met, you both realized that your story did not start here, and will go on for a long time, through many lives. That is why you wanted to help each other and reassure each other, so the other can feel safe. Three lifetimes, that's how far back you have known each other, one time he was a good friend of yours, a close friend, when both of you lived as men."

"What? Wow. That's… deep. A bit awkward though…"

"Just be careful. You vibrate high. You can feel it even now. I certainly do. You vibrate very high."

Yvette thought back to the vibrations she experienced, alone in her bed last night, but quickly rerouted her thoughts towards high spiritual consciousness.

"You think I will scare him away? Should I take it slowly?"

"That is a possibility, because he is vulnerable. In fact, he is wounded."

"Gosh, not again. I've had enough of men licking their own wounds, which was what Ben was all about. And when I licked his wounds, he tore them apart again so he can remain in pain."

"Words of clarity. I'm impressed. You never phrased your relationship with your ex so directly and cleanly. But Jay is different. He is walking the walk, he is coming back. But the path is long and windy. You need to be patient and set your pace according to him. If he was to be slower, walk with him. Don't fly ahead. You will lose him."

The stark, warm straightforwardness of Julie-Marie was so different to the empathic compassion of Jocelyn, yet Yvette was grateful. Maybe a clear, bright guiding light is exactly what she needs in this great colorful swirl of emotions she is experiencing now.

"He is a kindred spirit." Julie Marie went on "That means his feelings are clear and what he is experiencing on his side is vast. It is not something he was actively looking for. He has a great fight ahead of him. Commitment - that is a pledge that lasts forever and carries responsibility. We can call that scary, but it is not about fear. You are a challenge. A lesson. A pot of gold. A pile of treasure at the end of a treacherous journey. He is about to embark on that journey, Yvette, and I know you feel that too - but when he does, he needs to be prepared thoroughly. Unconditional love. The ultimate prize. That requires a deep connection, between two open hearts. When you open your heart, you are vulnerable. And he has been scarred, but more importantly: he does not want to scar you. He cares about you. He is your soulmate. When you look into each other's eyes, you realize the eternal flame of friendship, a deeper understanding and acceptance. That is the realization of being from the same kind. He wants the best for you. This is why you must let him prepare well. He will surely keep a certain distance, to protect you, until he will be ready. It is a great, enduring task for him - and it will challenge you as well. If you both reach the end and find each other at the end of the trail, opening up your hearts, the reward will be ultimate and infinite. Unconditional love. I know that is what you are looking for. You are saying it out loud all the time, and when you don't, your craving is written all over your aura. But sometimes, the more you want something, the more gracefully it drifts away from your reach. You need to trust."

"Trust who? Jay? I do. I will… do my best."

"The correct question is: What?"

"What?"

"What."

"I mean: What?!"

"Yes."

"Yes what?"

"I affirm. You should ask: what to trust? But by getting there, you already know the answer."

"The Universe."