Not your baby mama

"Amanda?... Why are you still up?"

I get inside his office but I stay near to the door. He's drinking, his shirt open, he looks tired maybe drunk too. Still he looks as good as always. His gaze in the dark is grave.

"I was just heading to my bedroom."

"I see..."

He stand up from the chair and walk to me. I gulp, I feel all my body on alert. He looks hot also menacing.

Jackson gets really close to me, he tucks some hair back behind my ear.

I don't move or say anything, then he runs a finger through my lower lip. It feels like fire on my skin, I know what comes next.

Jackson pulls me to him with a hand on my lower back and kiss me.

I let myself in for a brief moment, just a few seconds before I back to my senses and push him away.

"What?..."

He doesn't wait for a answer and try to kiss me again.

"Jackson stop..."

He doesn't care, he holds me tighter. I can smell the alcohol on him.

"Jackson...no"

He's not stopping, he's all over me, Grabbing my @ss and kissing my neck.

He's too strong, I have to put some effort to push him away. When I finally free myself Jackson looks upset, I just want to leave. But he grabs my forearm, it hurts a little.

"What's wrong Amanda, this is not what you want?"

"You're drunk, I just want to go back to my bedroom."

Now he hold both of my arms, making me face him.

"Come on, Amanda. You put this little dress, and show up to my office this late..."

"Jackson let me go, you're hurting me."

"What is this Amanda? What's the problem?"

"Please, let me go!" I raise my voice to him.

"oh! I got it. It's about money? Is that what you want? No problem baby, how much do you want?"

"Don't talk with me like this. I don't want your money."

Jackson takes some money from his pocket and hands to me.

I don't know what's wrong with him, why he's trying to hurt me like this.

"Oh! that's new... this is not what you like Amanda?"

I feel some tears coming out, I know he's talking with Amanda but it hurts.

I slap him on his face, he looks shocked, I know I am too.

He touch his face where I slapped him, I bet it was not strong enough to hurt him. I think the shock was bigger than the pain.

He's staring at me, but I can't read his eyes.

"I'm sorry... I didn't..."

I can't finish my sentence, i just run away to my bedroom.

I lock the door behind me diving in the bed. Finally I breath again, I crash. I can't hold the tears anymore.

I cried myself to sleep, in the morning I wakeup feeling heavy and drained. I head to the shower and take off my clothes, when I pass in front of the mirror I take a glance of my naked body.

I see the bruise on my forearm, I close my eyes and the events from last night comes again in my mind.

I get into the shower and let the water wash my tears.

When I finish getting ready i check the time, Jax will probably be awake soon.

I look outside the window, Jackson car is not outside. I think he already left, I don't want to face him so soon.

Josie is still not around. I head to Jax bedroom, I freeze when I open the door and find Jackson holding him. I swallow my shock and walk inside.

"I didn't see your car outside, I thought you already have left."

"No, probably Samuel did."

He looks embarrassed, when I approach him to take Jax, Jackson low his eyes avoiding me.

"Hey big boy! Did you slept well?"

"He just woke up, I changed his diaper." He speaks still mitt looking at me.

Jax is still sleepy, he snuggles to me, I love when he does this. He's so sweet.

I sway with him in my arms, I close my eyes smiling.

Then a soft touch on my forearm makes me startle. Jackson remove his hand fast, he look into my eyes, his voice is low and painful.

"It hurts?"

It's not that bad, It doesn't hurt anymore but last night got me jumpy.

"Not really."

He closes his eyes and take a deep breath, he looks tired with dark circles around his beautiful eyes.

"Amanda... the way I treated you last night. I'm sorry, it was wrong."

I don't think I can answer without let the tears fall again. I dont want to cry in front of him.

"He's probably hungry, I'll make his breakfast."

I take the baby with me leaving Jackson in the room.

The following days are not that bad, I'm getting used to my routine as a mother. It's still difficult to deal with the house things, but Josie is always around to help me.

Jackson is still distant, I give him time alone with Jax. I think it's better this away, we only talk when is something related to the baby.

On Saturday morning I call Bonnie, she's very understanding. Of course I didn't tell her all the truth, she only knows I'm taking care of my nephew.

"Mrs Resdgrave..."

"Yes, Kelly..."

I don't know if I'll ever get used to this name.

"You got a call from Mr Redgrave office, his waiting for you to meet him for lunch with his business partners in the Tennis club."

"Thank you, Kelly"

(He probably needs his fancy accessory services again.

But this time I'm not going alone. I don't care how Amanda was about this but I'm not playing Jackson doll around his friends anymore.)

Later that day I arrive on the tennis club with baby Jax.

"Mrs Redgrave, it's nice to see you again. You look gorgeous as always."

I can't barely hold the urge to roll my eyes, I bet his greetings are according to the clients money.

"It's nice to be back."

"Your husband is already waiting for you, let me show you your table."

"Thanks"

From the distance I spot Jackson sitting on a table with two more person, I suppose they're his business partners. Josie told me what she knows about them but it was not enough.

They're a man maybe a little older than Jackson and a woman.

She's gorgeous and looks very confident. I'd say she's very close to Jackson too, based on the way she smile to him and touch his arm.

I'm not his wife, but I know that's not the way business partners should act.

When they see me the jaw of the woman drops, she's Hanna and she's definitely not happy. I bet her and Amanda are not the closest friends.

"Amanda! I was not expecting you to bring Jax with you."

Jackson is the first to speak.

"I thought some outdoors time would be good for him. I hope you don't mind."

"Of course not, I miss my boy."

"Wow Jax! the last time I saw your boy he was just a newborn."

The man seems to be nice, his name is Matt.

"Yes, he's growing up so fast."

It's so different to see Jackson this way, so relaxed. He looks proud talking about his baby.

"And you look beautiful as always Amanda."

"Don't be silly, the nights awake are taking the price."

"You really looks tired, Amanda. You always managed all the nights out but I think it's different with a baby."

(Of course she had to mention.)

"Since he left the hospital a couple of weeks ago he only sleeps with Amanda. My magic doesn't work with him anymore."

"I really doubt it Jax."

(She's really flirting with him right on my face... or Amanda face... whatever)

"I think you're not match for mommy charms, Jax."

Matt jokes making Jackson laugh.

"He's mama's boy and I dont even try to pretend this is not my fault."

Matt and Jackson laughs but Hanna looks like she's ready to puke.

Jackson looks even more handsome when he smiles, makes he look younger.

Surprisingly having lunch with Jax and his business partners was not so bad as the investors dinner. I'm happy I took baby Jax with me, he really lights up the mood of everyone around.

"Is that Aaron Pullman from Pullman Investments?"

Matt points to a man on the other side of the restaurant.

"Yes, I think so."

"We should go to talk with him."

"Can I take your husband for a moment, Mandie?"

They both stands up.

"No problem."

"This will not take too long."

Jackson run a hand through the baby's head and leave.

I still don't know much about Jackson business, I only know he's always making contacts. I don't know why he was so upset when we left the investors dinner the other week, but I suppose this is the reason he looks so stressed lately.

Jax and Matt leaves the table, I'm alone now with Hanna. Matt seems to be a nice guy, it was the first person from Jax friends who was kind to me.

Hanna in the other hand is looking at me now despised, her plastic smile from when Jackson was here it's gone. I make sure to ignore her.

"Nice play Amanda. I'm impressed."

"Am I supposed to know what this means?"

"ha! Showing up with the baby, playing the dedicated mother."

"I'd love to talk with you Hanna, but it won't work if you keep talking in puzzles."

"You're using this kid to keep Jackson, but this will not work forever."