Tell me your secrets

"You're using this kid to keep Jackson, but this will not work forever."

She speaks to me while touching baby Jax hand, she's smiling to him but her eyes are dead.

I know Amanda probably took advantage of her pregnancy to marry Jackson, but I'm not letting anyone like Hanna around the baby.

I take baby Jax from his chair forcing Hanna to leave his tiny hand. I'm burning her with my eyes, my voice is low but I make sure to sound very clear.

"I don't care whatever you think you have against me Hanna, but I'm warning you this time once. Don't you dare to touch my son without my permission ever again."

I leave her alone in the table, I can feel her eyes on my back when I walk away.

I'm playing with Jax around the club, I bet he'll be walking soon. He's so smart and strong for his age.

"Sorry, it was longer than what I thought."

Jackson meet us outside.

"Don't worry, we're having fun here."

"I see..."

Jackson is wearing a less formal outfit, his nearly trimmed beard is very charming.

I don't dare to look too long, I don't need this kind of complication now. But I can't help thinking if he ever tried to love Amanda, or if there's something between Jax and Hanna.

I definitely can tell Hanna wants him, but I don't know if he feels the same. I still dont know Jax this well.

I'm watching him playing now with baby Jax, I'm lost in my thoughts when his voice wakes me up.

"Amanda, I was thinking..."

"What did you say? sorry I was distracted."

"I was saying I've be thinking about what you told me when we got back from the hospital with Jax."

"I'm not sure if I know what you're talking about."

"You said when Jax got sick none of us were there for him. I think you're right."

"Oh! I was just tired and scared for seen him ill."

"I know, you never leave him since."

I keep my head down, I don't know how to explain the subtle change in Amanda's behavior.

"I want to spend more time with him too."

"That's good, Jackson. He needs you."

"I mean the three of us as a family."

He speaks looking straight into my eyes.

I look at him unable to answer, I'm happy Jackson wants to spend more time with his son but I'm worried about what would that means to me.

"He's starting to get tired, I should taking him back to home."

"Ok, let me just talk with Matt and Hanna then we're leaving."

"No, it's ok. Samuel can drive me back."

"It will be fast, I promise."

Jackson head inside the restaurant area, then come back five minutes later as he promised.

"Ready?"

"hmm..hmm.."

"Ok big boy, lets go home."

He takes baby Jax from me and I follow them to the car.

When we get in home Jax is already asleep, I take him to his bedroom before I head back to mine.

When I'm not with Jax I don't have much to do, I start to think how empty is Amanda life in this house. Has been almost three weeks since she left, leaving only a short message.

I decide to look around her bedroom, maybe I can find something to help me find out why and where she left.

I'm inside her 'walk in' closet, the place is so huge I didn't even know all the clothes here.

I spot a small box on top of the shoes shelf. Its too high but maybe I can climb.

I climb the shelf, still it's not enough to reach the box, I try a little more on my tip toes. My fingers are almost touching the box when I slip down, falling backwards.

"ahh!!"

"Amanda!?"

I was ready to feel the pain of hit the ground but someone catch me.

"What where you thinking climbing those shelves?!"

I'm in Jackson arms, I don't even know how he got here. I was so concentrate on what I just found inside Amanda closet I didn't even see he coming.

"A bag! ...I was looking for a bag I can't find anywhere."

"And you thought the best idea was climbing up by yourself? What were you thinking?"

"I... uh.."

Jax is looking at me terrified, he's still holding me tight.

He's wearing a sweatshirt, his hair is messy and sweaty, he was probably exercising. My hands are holding tight on his arms, he's strong, all his muscles are tense. Jackson is looking at me waiting an explanation.

How can I think on something smart to say when he looks so damn wild and hot, holding me so close?

(Don't go there, Candice...Don't go there...)

"Jackson..."

"Yes...?"

Y-you're...sweating?"

"oh!"

He finally let me go on my feet.

"Sorry, I was running."

I know I'm drooling, probably open mouthed too.

"What are you doing here anyway?"

I hope the new subject clear my last thoughts.

"Ray Sanderson called me about the fundraising, he told me he has been trying to talk with you. Ray said the deadline is getting short, but since you insisted on organize the ball he decide to wait a little more before find someone else."

"Ray Sanderson...?"

($hit... I have no idea what he's talking about?)

"Are you ok, Amanda?"

"Yes! sure."

"So, when are you thinking to meet him?"

"I think I could see him tomorrow."

"Ok, I'll let him know."

"Thanks... Jackson."

He nods, and leaves the bedroom.

($hit! now I'm really fücked. I suppose to organize a fundraise ball with Ray Sanderson. I just need to find out how to organize a fundraise ball, what the fundraising is about and who the fück is Ray Sanderson I should meet tomorrow.)

After I compose myself I back to my task, this time I'm more careful. I use a chair to reach the box, this time is easier.

I get the box in my hands and a key fell down from under the box.

The box is locked, I get the key and try to open, but the key doesn't belong to this box.

I inspect the box and the key a little more but seems I can't solve this right now.

(Maybe Josie can help me, tomorrow this is the first thing I'm doing. This may be the key for Amanda secrets.)

The next morning I can't wait to talk with Josie.

"Josie? Can you please come to my bedroom, I need your help with something."

"Sure!"

"Tell me what happened?"

"Do you recognize this box and this key?"

"No, never saw before. What is this?"

"I don't know. I found both hidden in the closet."

"The key is not from the box?"

"No, It doesn't work."

"We could check the library and Mr Redgrave office."

"Yes, this is a good idea. There's something else."

"Tell me"

"I suppose to meet Ray Sanderson today and organize a fundraise ball."

"I see... Did you met him before?"

"Of course not, I have no idea what is this about."

"Mr Redgrave family owns a foundation for Alzheimer research.

This Ray Sanderson is the social manager."

"oh! I see. And what am I supposed to do?"

"I can't help you with that, I think you'll have to meet him to find out."

"Ok, thank you Josie. I don't know what I'd do without you."

"You're welcome, you should talk with Mr Redgrave about give me a raise.

"You if find out where this key belongs I'll give you a raise myself."