xvii

Lan was on his bed, laying on his back with his hands behind his head. He was lost in all kinds of thoughts regarding what happened today.

He tried his best to not show it in front of Liwei, but he was really shaken. But he couldn't blame her for it, nor did he want to. What was she supposed to do then ? Just wait for the both of them to get killed by these Shan Nu's ?

But what was he supposed to do ? Casually accept killing ?

This was the biggest headache since transmigrating into this world.

Just like when he himself killed a man back then, what really shocked him was how little he was actually affected by it. It happened and it was awful, but why wasn't he more shocked ?

Why wasn't he a minimum scared of Liwei ? Why did his good opinion of her didn't change ?

He thought back on when he was helping her tend to her wounds. He never imagined he'd ever see her so awkward one day. He wasn't too happy with himself, being pleased by something that made her uncomfortable, but he had noticed how said discomfort caused her ears and cheeks to turn red.

He sighed as another question crossed his mind —why did he still find her cute ?

No matter if he could still picture her fighting and covered in blood, it couldn't overtake the main image he had of her.

Having her hair let loose all the time, no matter how much she'd been told it was inappropriate.

Eating way too many sweets —especially when it was made with lychee or peach.

Happily helping out Madam Zheng, without wanting anything in return.

Sulking when people thought she was younger than her age.

Helping him practice to be able to use his spiritual powers again.

She was a nice person. During these two weeks, she never acted differently than any other mortal.

Lan remembered her words at this instant : « if I didn't kill, I wouldn't be alive now ».

He received proof of this statement right away ! If she hadn't killed the Shan Nu's, the two of them would have surely died. He had to constantly remind himself that this was the way of this world.

He sighed. His thoughts were a mess ! He didn't want to think about it any longer. What could he do if killing didn't shock him more than that ? It sounded wrong to say that but on the other hand, he could rejoice at this fact. It would make it easier to get used to this world.

When Lan was simply a reader, he didn't think much of even the most ruthless characters. It wouldn't keep him from liking them, but it wasn't a big deal. Now that he himself was in a story, he began to ponder. Was it the reason why he was basically unbothered by the killing ? Was his indulgence in fantasy worlds actually as unhealthy as his parents said ?

Huang Lan, you said you didn't want to think about it anymore !, he yelled at himself.

The room was in the dark, but he had lit up a candle provided by the inn. The window was open and the cool spring wind reached him and teased the warm flame which flickered incessantly. Incense was also burning, but half of the smell was swept out of the window. It only emitted a faint smell of orchid, just enough to be pleasing.

It was a comfortable room, and the atmosphere was amazing. Usually, Lan would have rather died than leave it. But now, he couldn't bear to stay inside any longer. His thoughts were unleashed and as wild as ever, questioning everything, confusing everything, and he was close to an existential crisis.

He got up and blew the candle out. He found his veil which he tied behind his head and walked outside of his room. He made his way downstairs and was lucky to stumble on the attendant that helped him earlier.

He was young, maybe only a few years older than Lan. His features weren't outstanding, but he could still be described as good-looking. He offered him a smile.

"Young master," he politely called, "is your stay comfortable ?"

Lan smiled back, "Yes, it's all good. Thank you again for the medicine."

"It's nothing. I saw you come earlier with that lady, she was really badly injured. I don't understand why no one was willing to help you."

"Yes, well I guess everyone's hands are already full with their own issues."

"You're right, but that doesn't excuse it. They still have to help you anyway, you're a client here after all."

"It's fine."

"How is the lady doing ?"

"She's doing better. Most injuries aren't serious."

"I'm glad to hear that. Oh, I'm sorry if I'm restraining you."

"No, not at all ! Actually, it's good to stumble on you, I need to ask something."

"Sure."

"Would it be possible to boil water for a bath ?"

"Of course it is ! Should I prepare for two buckets ?"

"Yes please !"

"I'll bring them to your rooms when it's done, but I'll need you to give me the numbers."

"It's room 27 for me. Bring the two buckets to me, I'll take care of the rest."

They were talking about bringing it to a lady's room, so the attendant had no right to insist on doing it.

"No problem. You can go back now."

"Thank you." he said before climbing the stairs back up.

After talking to Liwei, he questioned himself about whether or not he felt a good aura from this attendant. By coming downstairs, he had intended to find him again, not only for the water but to check again.

And he was right the first time. When the weird customer came to Sun and Moon Inn last time, although Liwei deemed he was just a mortal, he still was able to feel a weird energy coming from him, as she did. Later that day, he could feel the evil energy spreading in the village, despite not being able to identify it. Thus he still esteemed he could do as much as this right.

Going back up, he went to knock on Liwei's door. He should make sure she was awake, something he should have done before asking to boil a water bucket for her. He seemed to not be doing anything in the right order today. His head was throbbing due to the storm of thoughts he tried to suppress, but if one looked carefully, one would notice that his eyes seemed more glassy and distant than usual.

The door opened, and Lan had to slightly incline his head downward to see Liwei. He was surprised to see her in a clean and tidy dress. They left in a hurry with nothing though. Did she have time to buy one ?

"You got changed." was the first thing he thought to say.

"Oh, yes. Come in first."

She was already standing on the side, so Lan casually walked in. She locked the door behind them.

"I also have sets of clothes for you." she added.

"Really ?"

"Yes. It slipped off my mind earlier so I didn't give it to you."

"That's fine, but... when did you get new clothes ?"

"I've always had them prepared." she admitted. "I guessed there would be a time we'd need to get away in a hurry, and I know clothes aren't considered a priority when you're running for your life, but I also know it's uncomfortable to keep the same dirty clothes. So I packed some in two qiankun bags, that I put in my regular qiankun bag."

Lan was stunned.

"Did you pack anything else ?" he curiously asked.

"No. Just clothes."

So this was really her priority. Lan remembered that he himself woke up in clean clothes, after being in a coma for five months. Dirty clothes must be her pet peeve.

She rummaged in her crimson qiankun bag and took another one, similar to it. Lan thought she had only one kind of these pouches, but when she handed it to him, he find that instead of the orchid embroidered on it, like the previous she had given him, it instead had a willow vine.

His mind instantly flashed to her sword, but he clenched his eyes shut for a second, suppressing the thought.

He mindlessly stroked the gold threads as he looked at them. Liwei saw he was very focused on it, so she looked down at it. Upon seeing the willow vine, her eyes widened slightly.

"Oh," she was visibly surprised, "I gave you the wrong one."

Lan looked up at her, "Oh ?"

"Hm..." she took out another bag, "I differentiate our belongings like this," she turned the one she was holding to Lan. "When it's mine, it's embroidered with a willow vine. When it's yours it's an orchid."

She extended her arm, giving him the right pouch, and taking back the other.

Lan hadn't thought about it before, because the only time she had given him a qiankun pouch before was the one that contained money.

When he gave his name, most people thought it was written with the character for 'blue', which was more manly, but it was in fact written with the character for 'orchid'. Lan didn't think it was on purpose, but he needed to ask.

"Then why was your money in the one with an orchid ?"

Liwei's smile unnoticeably froze, but she was very quick to come back to her normal state.

"They're the same colors, and I just recently got those with orchids on them. That time I made the same mistake as today and took the wrong pouch."

It made sense, so Lan simply nodded and dropped the matter.

"Okay. Well, I came to tell you that I requested to boil water, I'll bring the bucket to you once it's done."

"Oh, thank you."

Lan smiled as an answer.

That was initially the only thing he had to say, but after talking a bit now, he remembered one of the first questions he had.

"Can I ask you a question ? There's something I really want to know."

Liwei was cautious, "What is it ?"

"Don't worry, it's nothing related to immortal beings."

"Ask whatever you want anyways, I'll decide if I can answer it or not."

Lan internally sighed.

"Okay. It sounds a bit embarrassing to ask though, and I don't know how to formulate it."

"You can beat around the bush if you want."

She suggested it so naturally that Lan wondered if it was something she was used to suggesting to people.

"I could do that. So, uh... if someone woke up and they find that something was done to them, but it wasn't them who did it, then who could have done it ?"

Liwei was confused, and it showed on her face. Maybe he was being vaguer than she had expected. He tried again.

"It's like this : if someone slept with yellow clothes, but they woke up with red clothes, how did it happen ? They didn't get changed by themselves, but they doubt the person living with them did it. So how did it happen ?"

This time he was direct enough, he thought. He mentioned that it was a dressing matter, he simply didn't say that it was about him. Surely Liwei would understand.

"Why would they doubt it ? If he doesn't remember getting changed, either he was sleepwalking, or it's really the person living with them." she shrugged. "Why do you ask that anyway ?"

"No wait, I need another answer." he said instead. It involved him, and he was on the way to getting the answer, so it was really important to get it now. "Think carefully. The person isn't sleeping, they're in a coma, so they can't sleepwalk, right ?" he started, and she nodded.

Since he mentioned the coma, Liwei started to understand that he was referring to himself.

He continued, "But after all this time, when he woke up, he found out that his clothes were neat and clean, not clothes he wore for five months. How did it happen ?"

Liwei understood completely now. When he first woke up, he realized this detail about his clothes. He probably wanted to know ever since, but she knew he wouldn't just come out and casually ask 'who took care of changing my clothes when I was in a coma ?'.

Had he always been so awkward ?

"Ah, now I see what you mean." she said, and Lan was relieved. "If you're worried about it, no it wasn't me who took care of that."

That was adding to his relief, and he let out a sigh.

"Then who was it ?"

"My tree."

Lan wasn't sure he heard right. "Come again ?"

Liwei smiled when she saw his growing confusion.

"That tree you destroyed was your caretaker."

"I don't understand. I mean- okay, I understand but I can't picture it."

Liwei shrugged, "It can expand its branches and follow some basic orders."

Lan remembered how he uprooted it and how it flew in pieces. He was still surprised about this rush of strength that never came back to him, but now he especially felt bad about it.

"Is this what you call biting the hand that fed you ?" he said, looking very embarrassed.

Liwei chuckled, "It won't be mad at you."

Lan didn't expect her to talk about it as if it was a person with emotions.

"Really ?"

"Yes."

She wasn't joking or teasing him. Trees were plants, which were living beings after all. Cultivated trees should unsurprisingly feel more alive than regular ones.

"I'm glad then."

Three knocks were faintly heard. It wasn't on Liwei's door.

"Oh, that's from my room !" Lan realized. "It must be the water."

He walked to the door and opened it. He saw the attendant he knew accompanied with another, each one carrying a wooden bucket of steaming water.

"Oh, I'm here !" he said.

The familiar attendant, who had the bucket resting on his hip to be able to knock, looked his way.

"Young master !" he called.

"Yes, can you bring one here already, please ?"

"Sure."

He came with the bucket, and Lan stood on the side to let him in.

Liwei understood from what she heard that he was the one who helped Lan earlier. And he was right, he was harmless.

"Thank you." Lan smiled at him once he put the bucket down, then turned to Liwei. "I'll go too."

"Okay."