To the Battlefield!

On Tuesday, I decided to invite the nerd over to my house for a competitive gaming session on my PlayStation 4. I wanted to see which one of us was the better gamer.

To tell you the truth, absolutely nothing could prepare me for what would happen between us.

At about five PM, Hera arrived at my house. And not a moment too soon, either, because I had already set everything up and was ready to school this damn nerd.

After I turned my console on, I selected Swords of Spirits 6 (my all-time favorite fighting game).

"I love that game!" Hera said, breaking the silence. "I play it with my mom all the damn time! Unfortunately, she always wins."

After selecting the conditions for all our battles (up to five sixty-second rounds with no ring-outs), I selected "Start Game".

Fellers, it's battle time!

I selected Athena (the hottest character in the game), and of course, Hera selected the nunchaku master, Xiao-Liu.

Gotta admit, Xiao-Liu IS really hot and muscular...

I selected the stage we would fight upon: the Shrine of Eurydice. As soon as the game loaded up, we were ready!

Battle one.

FIGHT!

I was the one to take first blood in the round with a 9-hit combo, but Hera struck back with a powerful 8-hit combo with Xiao-Liu. However, I came back by deflecting a shot coming my way with a Guard Impact and hit Xiao-Liu with a super powerful Break Attack, dealing a Lethal Hit and breaking Xiao-Liu's shirt!

"Well!" Hera yelled in surprise at what had just happened. "I certainly didn't expect that!"

"What can I say? I'm the best Swords of Spirits player in my family!"

At that moment of distraction, Hera dealt a big deal of damage, and now I was at critical vitality! But I came back with a Critical Edge, putting her at critical vitality as well!

But would this nerd give up? Hell no! She hit me with a big combo, damn near knocking out my character!

"Huh. You're not bad... for a nerd," I told her after knocking her Xiao-Liu out. But this girl wouldn't let that slide in the slightest! She jabbed me in the arm.

"Ow! What was that for?"

"Call me a nerd again, JJ! Call me a nerd again! I dare you! I double dare you, motherfucker! Call me a nerd one more god-damned time!"

Ugh, we all know where that line is from...

Battle two.

FIGHT!

I blocked a few shots from her Xiao-Liu, and as soon as I let go of my guard, I hit her with a punishing counterattack! Hera was surprised that I was able to get a combo in so quickly.

As soon as her meter filled once, she immediately activated her 15-hit Critical Edge!

"Well! The dweeb learned something new!"

That was enough to make Hera even more pissed than she already was. And I don't know how Mom heard that, but almost immediately after, I heard: "Jason! Leave Hera alone with those nasty names! I swear to God, if you call her one more nasty name, I'm shoving that fucking controller up your God damn ass!!"

Before I knew it, at that next moment of distraction, I got KO'd again! God, that wasn't fair!

Battle three.

FIGHT!

Comeback time! I was ready to school this nerd and claim supremacy amongst us!

I started off with a 10-hit combo, which I thought was going to be a no-doubter, but Hera did a smart thing: she blocked them all, and hit me with a huge lethal hit as a counter!

What the hell! Damn nerd REALLY knows how to play! Nonetheless, I cannot let this nerd leave the match with the win!

I activated my Critical Edge again to knock her down a peg. And after a few more hits after the super, I finally had Hera at half health!

But remember: Nguyens never give up, I'll give them that. Just as I was getting ready to school this nerd and end the fight, she came back with a combo of her own, confirming into her Critical Edge once more and putting me on edge again! I tried my hardest to come back from that savage attack and take the victory, but as I was blocking the blows inflicted by Hera's Xiao-Liu, my guard was crushed!

"Dammit!"

She immediately hit me with a Break Attack, dismantling Athena's top and winning the round and the match!

Shit... Who knew that Hera was much better than me at this game?

"Hey, Hera," I said, "wanna go another round?"

"Yeah, but be warned, JJ... I will never go easy on someone like you."

When the Character Select screen loaded up, I decided to play as one of my custom-made characters: my one true waifu, Momo Yaoyorozu; soul of Drahmin.

Hera selected custom as well, but selected Lady Dimitrescu from Resident Village; soul of Talos.

This time, I selected Ostreinsburgh Castle's Hall of the Chosen. This time, I was ready. No distractions, just pure concentration. Absolutely no holds barred.

But a few lost battles later, I switched games to My Hero One's Justice 2 after suffering my umpteenth loss to Hera. I was not about to lose to this damn nerd again!

"Okay, this is where it gets serious!" I said as the game was beginning to load up. "Prepare to get crushed!"

"Oh, no, I'm sooo scared," Hera said sarcastically.

"Sure, you are..."

Hera ignored me and turned to the screen as soon as the title came up on-screen.

I pressed the cross button to bring up the main menu of the game, then selected "Free Battle."

I carefully selected the conditions of the battles: Sidekicks disabled, two rounds to win and a sixty-second timer.

Then, I progressed to "Character Select."

"It's time to choose your character!" came the voice of Mirio Togata.

I selected my first waifu, Momo Yaoyorozu, as she selected Kyoka Jirou; she thinks sound waves are gonna beat out creation! VERY unlikely!

Round one!

Ready?

CLASH!

After creating the sword using Momo's ability, I was able to deflect the sound blasts coming my way thanks to Hera's Jirou! And guess what? It damaged her!

"Hey!" Hera said. "That's not rock!"

I ignored her and kept pummeling her with a flurry of attacks until I was able to knock her back with a twenty-nine hit combo! And afterward, I created the shield and blocked Jirou's Level 1 Plus Ultra attack, without losing blocking strength.

Unfortunately for me, Hera knew how to break guards; she pummeled my blocking position with an unblockable attack and executed a combo of thirty-nine hits, seriously damaging me!

"Whoa, are you serious!?" I yelled. "That is IT!"

We went at it until the very end of the round.

K.O!

M: Not...again...

No way! No goddamn way! I can't believe she actually beat me this round!

But no worries, though. I'll for sure get this next one.

Round two!

Ready?

CLASH!

This round, Hera was the first to strike, damaging me with a ten-hit combo. Good, but not good enough, because after creating the spear, I severely damaged her with a twelve hit combo, knocking her back!

"Oh, hell no!" Hera screamed, trying to come back with a combo of her own.

But she didn't get through, because I was blocking each and every one of her blows. But unfortunately, I didn't have my shield equipped and eventually ended up getting Guard Broken.

I should really worry less about defense and worry more about offense.

After getting pummeled again, I activated my Level 1 Plus Ultra and blew her away with a flurry of exploding Matryoshkas!

"Yeah, Hera. Those Matryoshkas are that powerful."

"You'll pay, JJ!"

Ha! An empty threat... I pummeled Hera again with another combo, knocking her Jiro out!

K.O!

J: I'm just...no good...

YES!

I finally got her! I guess persistence really does pay off!

But no time to get cocky yet, J-man... It was time for the last round. Time to show this nerd who's the ultimate around this house and claim my dominance!

Final Round!

Ready?

CLASH!

I was just about to launch a combo, but I was stopped by Jirou's sound blast!

"Wha..."

Hera snickered as she, who also couldn't afford to lose, continued to deconstruct my Momo, hit after hit, strike after strike.

I tried to come back with a combo of my own, knowing well that striking her guard would chip away at her health. But Hera had something else in mind.

As soon as I was done with my combo, Hera activated Jirou's Level 2 Plus Ultra!

"Let's turn up the music!"

I knew what was coming: Jirou debilitated Momo using her jacks!

"It's ringing in my ears!"

Well, if you're a fan of the game, you know how the rest goes...

K.O!

M: That was so pitiful...

That was embarrassing...

That, folks, was a near-perfect round from Hera to end the match!

Player two wins!

Low-key, I was impressed by this nerd! Not only did she outlast me and my awesome combos, but this nerd was WAY too advanced for me to take on!

"Good game, Hera!" I said. "You're pretty good!"

"Yeah, that was a good match, JJ!" Hera exclaimed. "How about another?"

"Bring it, Hera! This time I won't let up!"

The playdate went on for another two hours, and it ended in a tie before Hera had to go home.