Chapter 30 Don't Be Afraid

Lying on the hospital bed, watching the light panels pass from one to the other, Santichai turned his head to the left and saw KK smiling down at him. He squeezed KK's hand hard. Then the bed stopped.

One of the nurses said, "Mr. Suwannarat, do you have any last words for Mr. Kittibun?"

KK lowered his head and said, "Don't be afraid, I'll be waiting for you outside this door." He wiped the tears from the corners of Santichai's eyes. "Don't cry. Grandfather is up there watching over you."

"I'm not afraid. I'm happy. Very happy. Thank you," Santichai said.

KK smiled and kissed Santichai's forehead lightly. He said, "Grandfather helps me take care of you now, don't be afraid."

Santichai smiled and said, "Thank You."

One of the nurses said, "Don't worry, Mr. Kittibun, we'll take care of you."

KK watched the nursing staff push Santichai into the operating room. He walked back to the waiting room, knowing that standing outside the operating room wouldn't help, he was a surgeon himself, so he knew better. He decided to go home and cook a good meal for Santichai when Santichai woke up. As he walked through the waiting room, his phone rang. He took out his phone, it was from his mother.

KK, "Hello."

Mrs. Cole, "KK, are you alright? Do you need anything? Let me know if you need anything, okay. Remember, your mom is only a phone call away."

KK smiled and said, "Ma, I'm fine, I'm doing fine."

Mrs. Cole, "Are you sure? Dr. Johnson called and said you didn't go back for treatment. Why didn't you go? Did you remember to take your medicine?

KK paused for a while and said, "Ma, I haven't taken medicine for two months?"

Mrs. Cole asked worriedly, "Why? KK, you know you need that medication."

KK said, "Ma, would you believe me if I told you that I found a solution to my problem?"

Mrs. Cole sighed, "Yes."

KK asked, "What's up with this big sigh? Does that mean you don't believe me?"

Mrs. Cole said, "No, I trust you. I always trust you to use your best judgment."

KK said, "Don't worry...I'm not going to be as reckless as I used to be."

Mrs. Cole said worriedly, "You better not. I'm glad you found a solution. I'm so proud of you, my sweet, beautiful boy. Oh, I almost forgot, Sarah said you two were in the hospital, how is he?"

KK was confused, "He? Who?"

Mrs. Cole said, "Your boyfriend, what's his name?"

KK said, "His name is Santichai Kittibun."

Mrs. Cole asked, "How is he? Has he had surgery?"

KK said, "He hasn't come out of surgery yet. Sarah said it could take four to six hours or more if there are complications."

Mrs. Cole reassured, "If Sarah says so, then everything will be fine. She'll take good care of him for you."

KK, "Ma, don't you mind if I date him?"

Mrs. Cole said, "No, I read it all online and went to a doctor. Bisexuality is not a disease, so don't let that old man tell you otherwise."

KK said, "Grandfather didn't know about him yet."

Mrs. Cole said, "I haven't forgiven him for what he said to you, because of what he said, you almost died."

KK said, "Ma, that was a long time ago, and it was me who failed to think clearly."

Mrs. Cole said, "Hinata, don't worry. We live in the modern world and not the past, and it doesn't matter what people say to you. What matters is that you are happy. I know my precious son will make me proud."

KK said, "Ma, I've already spent time explaining it to grandfather. Grandfather doesn't want to hear it because he said he wants a grandson."

Mrs. Cole asked, "Where are your father and stepmother?"

KK said, "Ma and Pa also understand. They don't put pressure on me."

Mrs. Cole said, "That's good. KK, should I hire a nurse to take care of Santichai, or can you get off work?"

KK said, "Just for today, I have to go back to the clinic tomorrow, and he will be hospitalized for seven to ten days after the operation for observation."

Mrs. Cole said, "Well, when I get back, let's go to lunch together."

KK, "Alright."

Mrs. Cole said sadly, "I'm sorry, Hinata, I know I'm not a good mother, but if you want anything, please tell me, okay."

KK said, "Ma, I'm doing well, you've given me enough."

Mrs. Cole sniffed, "I know you've never blamed me, but it's me who can't stop blaming myself."

KK said, "Don't be sad anymore, honestly, I'm doing fine. Ma, I have something I want to talk to you about."

Mrs. Cole said, "Go ahead."

"I know Santichai, and I have just started dating, but Santichai is a very nice guy and I want him to run the resort," KK said. "So, I'm sending him to continue college to get his degree in accounting and finance."

Mrs. Cole questioned, "What? KK, I haven't seen him. You know this resort was given to you by your grandfather, what if?"

KK said, "Mom, not now. I haven't spoken to him yet."

Mrs. Cole sighed, "You're going to give it your all this time, right?"

KK, "Mmm."

Mrs. Cole said, "Hinata, I don't want you to get hurt again, I'm afraid this time will be the same as last time."

KK said, "Ma, I'm getting older and wiser. You'll understand when you meet Santichai."

Mrs. Cole said, "Well, I'm not going to intervene in your personal relationships. Any man or woman you think is good enough for you than that person is also good enough for me."

KK, "Thank you ma."

Mrs. Cole asked, "What did Mrs. Suwannarat says?"

KK said, "I haven't told her yet."

Mrs. Cole said, "You must tell her in case she decides to be a matchmaker again. Oh yes, throw those envelopes away. I have to go. Gotta gets something to eat. You also get something to eat."

KK, "Bye bye."

KK hung up the phone and walked to a cafe near the hospital. He ordered some food and sat looking out the street waiting for his food. Then his phone rang again, and when he took it out, it turned out to be Santichai's phone. Someone sent Santichai a text message

KK read, "I missed you; did you forget?" He opened the file and found fifteen attachments of pictures of Santichai and his ex-boyfriend. By the first glance at Santichai's ex-boyfriend, KK realized that Santichai's ex-boyfriend was very handsome. Then out of respect for Santichai's privacy, he decided not to follow any further. KK turned to look out the window again, this time he saw his own reflection slightly blurred on the glass. He closed his eyes and sighed.

KK heard the hissing sound from the coffee machine and took him back to that rainy night he wanted to erase from his memory.