The way I was addicted to you, was terrifying, but somehow I liked it.

Now, all I can think about is those times when I was happy. Even if it was for a mere moment, at least I was. To have him for an eternity it was impossible for me, when mixed feelings hit around, colliding like an unstoppable storm, all I could think about was "Oh, if only I can have you for me forever, I would be the most happiest woman." But of course, that was not possible and so on, the desire still didn't fall apart. I was willing to tear myself apart, just for his good, as long as there is true happyness in his heart, his soul could be saved from all the demons that surrounded him and controlled him with all their power. Nothing can make them go away, but there I was, willing to destroy them all. Seeing the smile on his face every time, hurted me more then a thousand knifes. That sadness and feeling of desperation made me realize that fear took apart all I could repair and took care of. And so on, I continued to live my every day life in pain and suffering. I was shattered in pieces but I still wanted you even though I was aware you weren't good for me. Hope did fall apart and so did I.

Oh, but loving all his madness was all I could care about. Looking back, all that I was thinking about was "If you could be mine, would you be happy or would you want to run away? Would you be scared of how much I can love you or would you be grateful?"