Thirteen: The Little Performance

The loneliness had gotten to him. One of them would have to end the ego run and he decided that it was okay if that person had to be him. He couldn't stand it any longer, the silence the way he jumped when the screen on his phone lit up, the way he wished to be greeted with random wiffs of expensive perfume when she came to check up on his writing, it all got to him. Vanessa wasn't exactly who he preferred to be with but he loved and craved the stability that came with her. Whatever it was they had, it had been working for him so well.

Without giving it much thought, he found Himself on the road, in his car. The string of cars blocking him from getting to the hotel which he knew she was currently booked at should have given him time to rethink his decision but the urgency overrode logic. When hwqe was at a bad place like that, he needed atleast one person he could count on, and he knew Vanessa was it. There was no leaving if they hadn't made up. He would do anything.

Vanessa's schedule was free that day so she allowed herself to just stay in. Laziness had crippled her so she couldn't really put as much effort into her look as she wanted. But she didn't suppose anyone important would see her or care what she looked like for that matter. So she kept her lopsided bun and kept her night shirt on as a look for that day. She was spread out lazily on her unmade bed when the phone in her room rung and she was being asked if she could receive visitors.

" I wasn't expecting anyone. " she mumbled into the phone, her eyebrows pulling together, as she tried to contemplate who it could be.

" Can he come up then or should I send him away?" the unnaturally calm and monotoned voice of the receptionist came through the phone, forcing her to consider. She already knew the answer, her toes were curling into her fluffy socks and pride was swimming in her veins from the effectiveness of her plan. " Hello?"

Vanessa cleared her voice.

" You mind telling me who it is?"

The receptionist didn't have to say much, just a gasp and a flurry of whispered apologies from not recognizing Barry at first poured out of her mouth. Barry had probably done that thing where he wore a face mask and hat in public, lowering the mask when he saw an opportunity to use what was left of the good side of his recognition by the public.

" Its okay, send him up. "she almost squealed before hanging up. She let her top half fall behind her on the bouncy mattress and silk sheets. If she played her cards right, things might have happened on that bed. The thought of it had her giggling into the pillow she'd suddenly clutched like a fool. Then it dropped on her that he was actively on his way and she needed to look busy and get her room looking right.

In the speed of light she straightened her duvet over her sheets which she hadn't bothered to straighten out. She pulled the scrunchie off her hair and combed her fingers lightly into her it, and throwing her head down, grabbed all her silky hair and out it into a decent Ponytail. It was her favorite hairstyle and was slowly beginning to ne a part of her brand. It always brought out all the lines and curves of her symmetrical and bold facial features.

She breathed through her mouth onto her palm, letting the smell of her mouth hit her. It wasn't the freshest it could be as she had just had breakfast. She reached out for mouthwash and gaggled so quickly she choked and spat into the sink, letting the tap start to drain it away even before she was done, then she sat back on her bed, legs crossed, facing the window at the side of her room like that was such a natural thing to do. it would only be seconds till he entered the room and she wouldn't let him see how much he'd gotten to her.

" You got five minutes...!" She started the script that she had quickly formulated in he her jead for how that encounter was going to go. If there's anything the hate Barry was getting online taught her was that she was more or less a hot shot at that time . She needed to play the part.

" Okay. You look beautiful today. "

She could feel a smile blooming on her dry lips that she'd forgotten to moisturize, she bit both her lips between her teeth, refusing to give him a way in.

" I have the mirror for that. Four minutes thirty seconds, Barry. "she turned to face him finally, she has moved to sitting at the window ledge,enjoying the sound of life happening a few storeys beneath her.

" I'm sorry. " Barry's throat was closing in. With every attempt to make things better with Vanessa a part of him nudged him not to go on. But if there was anyone that could save him in the moment then it was her. She truly felt like a magic wand. Vanessa eye dropped from Barry's, the dishonesty was still there. The emptyness in his words was still there, and he looked constipated. His desperation filled the room and she immediately knew that he was inkty there out of necessity. A pain sliced through her. She sighed a soft shaky breath not wanting her emotions to over take her. She would stick to the script.

" For what Barry. "she was going to milk it out of him. She reminded herself not to push too hard. Its because she had been doing all the work that she ended up where she was with him. If she continued to basically raise him like she were his mom, nothing would change. All that rushing around the room and keeping up with her act wouldn't be worth it

" For taking you for granted, for not trying hard enough, for being a complete asshole to you. I really am sorry. I guess I just didn't realize how selfish I was being. I really want you back and I know you don't want to stay here." he looked around the room, the one time he was being sincere he couldn't face her, almost as if ashamed to admit what he needed her for.

" I actually don't mind it. it's peaceful and there's no one to make me feel like shit. " She crossed her arms, a little bit too forcefully, hurting the wound that Bianca had imprinted in her wrist. She was about to dress it but then heard Barry was coming by and her priorities had changed instantly. He noticed the discomfort and every intention of trying to get her back without being to desperate flew off the window.

He didn't even realize when the distance between them closed and he was expecting the little soring half moon indentations on her wrist. She didn't know how to stop him. It was easy to play games when he was standing a few metres away, now her lips burnt to be kissed by his and her body was giving in to the pull of his.

" Who did this to you?"

His genuine concern for her made her fuzzy inside and weak in the knees.More and more layers of her act were falling off. Just like that he'd reminded her about her encounter with Bianca, she would pay her to leave town if she had to.

" Some waitress, such a bitch." She tried to wriggle her way away from him but he couldn't let her go. " What you think an apology is just going to fix it? I can't know if you're just doing this because Thomas sent you."

" I really want to be with you. I swear it."

" I need you to prove it." She pushed against him gently but her hands wouldn't leave his pecs and his scent was wafting around her, making her dizzy for him. It was clear as the squeaky clean window behind her that there still was some form of attraction between them. And that was something to cling onto.

The idea of engagement hung between them. Barry cursed himself internally. She'd latched onto the idea and just wouldn't let it go. He was almost too afraid to ask for clarification and breathe life into it. It would be too cruel to bring up the whole engagement thing one more time and not actually get on one knee. He knew that. He was sure if he tried just a little bit harder he would actually learn to love her. Vanessa was right, Bianca had probably moved on, dating a rapper or motorsport racer. He would never meet her.

"It'll be different." He was so close to her now he basically breathed the words onto her plump lips,

" I promise" his lips brushed sofltly on hers, begging for entrance. She couldn't hold herself back anymore, with her other uninjured hand she grabbed the back of her neck and lowered it to her, letting him kiss away what was left of her charade. Her body pushed up against his, wanting more. By her book, things really had gone great. Barry wasn't so sure but he would have plenty of time to figure it out