To End Our Suffering

He walked up to the counter carrying a large pouch in one hand and a plastic container with a certain desert inside. There was a slight drag in his step and his face seemed to be drained of color, but his expression gave the opposite impression. The nurse greeted him cheerfully, her sudden relaxed posture at his presence indicating they were well acquainted.

"Going steady for six months now. Sure you don't want to bunker down in the nurse's quarters from time to time?" She shamelessly offered. Isaac laughed, putting it aside as a joke the nurses tend to share when he seldom gets to eavesdrop on them. He logged in his name and other required information. The portion that held every visit for the current month displayed his name for every single day.

"Be careful with her, after what she's been through I can only imagine. And try not to make her cry doctor's orders. Just call if you need anything." The nurse said. Isaac brightly smiled and then went straight to the elevators. He was accompanied by a married couple, both of whom were occupied entertaining their child who was seated in a wheelchair. Their upbeat exchange made a smile creep up his cheek, but when the conversation ended the silence and bank expression between the parents brought great discomfort. As they exited the elevator bright smiles resurfaced on their faces. What made Isaac assume that they were married he did not know, because their fingers held no indication of such an arrangement.

Aside from the lack of noise coming from an array of machines, her room resembled his mother's room from back then. A slight discomfort tingled its way through his entire body. He was breathless and shaking, afraid of what lies on the other side of the frame.

"You back? And right on schedule too." She was seated upright from her bed, looking directly at him.

"How'd you know?" Isaac asked.

"The stench of anxiety. But really the nurses called ahead." Mei teased. Isaac casually entered the room with heavy steps as he made his approach. He reached out for a stool by a small wash area and set it beside the bed so he could sit.

"Been awake long?" Isaac asked, setting the large pouch on the floor after acquiring its contents.

"Yep! Already had breakfast too. What's up with you? Your voice sounds husky." Mei turned directly to her left and looked straight at him. "Oh, yeah I know. Syd's been asking about you a lot. She'd like to visit more but she's got her hands full at the moment."

"Because of the incident?" Mei asked but there was no answer. All she heard was Isaac rummaging through his things.

"They found out who did it, the guy you saw in the building. It was Charlie."

"Charlie? But why would he—"

"Ozwell. He… forced him to do it. But when Charlie confessed Ozwell just gave himself up. He didn't even deny the claims." Isaac said, finally locating his materials after emptying the pouch. "Why did he?" Mei asked inquisitively.

"He came to me before everything and told me how he really felt. I guess that was his confession, huh?" Isaac asked as he started waving his pencil over the sketchpad. He was silent again. All Mei could hear was the pencil traveling across the paper.

"Do you blame yourself for this?" Mei asked and Isaac froze.

"No, I don't." He responded.

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"You know I can always tell when you're about to cry, right?" Mei declared.

"Yeah." His face grimaced as he tried to hide behind the sketchpad now filled with teardrops. Mei slowly reached out both of her hands to her left. She waved her hands in the air until they found their way to Isaac. She pulled him close for a tight embrace.

"Hey, remember when we were kids and I'd stuff your shorts with sand from the playground and you would cry about it for hours?" Mei asked, still holding on.

"I cried because you told me that fire ants were in the sand. And that the queen would lay her eggs inside me, but why mention this now?"

"I don't know. I guess I owe you an apology for all those years. Every time I saw you cry, it was always because of me or something I did."

"Mei…"

"Let me finish. I always imagined, that when I'd finally see you again things would get better. But some part of me wanted to stay away from you, now more than ever."

"Mei, what are you saying?" Isaac asked as he moved away.

"I'm saying that, maybe, it would be better for you that we go our separate ways."

Before he could answer a knock on the door followed by the nurse entering halted their conversation. Isaac gathered his things and stepped aside. The nurse asked Mei the routine questions, about how she was doing and if she was feeling anything different.

"Time to change the bandages, hon." The nurse said. Mei straightened her posture and the nurse started removing the bandages wrapped around her eyes. They were not only sore but both were red, and so were the veins that did not normally stick out like that. The area around her eye had a dark violet hue and the iris of her right eye had a lighter color than the one on the left.

"All done! Just hit the button if you need anything else, okay hon?" The nurse said to which Mei nodded in reply. She left the room along with the tray of used bandages.

"I should probably head out too. You must be exhausted." Isaac said as he motioned to the door.

"I'll be back tomorrow." Isaac declared. Mei could not say a word as she waved her hand in the direction of the door.

The remaining horse passed by in a flash as Mei would cycle between staring into different parts of the room and lying down to daydream, any thought that would whisk her away into the next day. The nurses would bring her the succeeding meals and check in on her one last time before lights out.

During the first week, she would feel the shards of glass claw their way around her eyes whenever she closed them. She could sense a small amount of intensity with light as merely opening them in the room could set her off. She refused to blanket herself in the cold room in fear of feeling the heat.

"This is for the best, right?" Mei asked herself as she hugged her pillow. She lay facing the other side, towards the window. She knew it was because the breeze would blow on her face as she heard the curtains ruffle. Even so, no amount of noise could cloud the thoughts that were overwhelming her. This was her every day since she woke up.