Chapter 8

FROM: Felix

I will win you again, Astia. I will.

I didn’t reply to his message and just put my phone back on the bedside table. I sighed heavily and brushed my hair using my fingers. He will win me back? Well then, good luck to him. He won’t get me back. I won’t let him. One mistake is enough and I don’t want to get myself being trap again. He was once a jerk in his life and he doesn’t deserve me. He doesn’t.

There’s a saying, Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.

So I won’t get back to him. Never. He will just waste his time running after me so if I were him, just let me go for good. If he truly loves me, he won’t do that thing in the first place. Now that we broke up, he will go after me? Is he insane? Did he realize that he love me after I let go of him? I sarcastically inside my mind. This isn’t a game, Felix.

Only you know love her when you let her go~

I didn’t know why I agreed to be his girlfriend in the first place. Of course, I know that he was a jerk in the first place. I know he had his flings left and right. The Felix I know before he became my boyfriend was only playing. Until he met me…

One day, he just approached me and introduced himself when in fact I already have a background of him and that I know him being a playboy. I got surprised one day when I noticed he changed himself slowly. I admit that I was happy for him that he changed. He wasn’t playing anymore. And the day when he started courting me and I said yes to him of becoming his girlfriend because I believe that he has changed for good and that was because of me. But not until that happened. He cheated on the day of our anniversary! Great right?

It crashed my world when I saw him that day with another girl. I was wrong. I was wrong of the thought of him changing for good. I-I… I couldn’t accept the fact that he cheated. I thought I made him happy. I thought he was contented. But I guess it was just a thought.

Then I just found myself grabbing my phone from the table and opening my gallery app. I browse our pictures together until I stop swiping the screen when I saw a very familiar picture of us.

As far as I can remember, the photo was taken on my birthday. I could remember what happened on that day. He surprises me. It was just a simple celebration for my special day yet full of happy memories and now, they will remain as memories. It won’t happen again. It won’t replace with new happy memories because we’re over and we won’t be together ever again.

I stared at the photo of us. We were both smiling at the picture like it was really genuine. If he truly loved me, why did he cheat?

I felt something rolling down my face. I just let myself cry again as I reminisce the memories of us until I get tired of it like the other days.

Why can’t these tears be over? I was tired of crying until I fall asleep.

Come Monday, I decided to get myself up and finally go to school because if I won’t, goodbye. Bella was worried about me all the time and I don’t know how many times I told her that I was totally fine. My love life issue doesn’t have to do with my studies. I need to strive hard for myself.

“Your sure you are okay?” she asked again after we decided to go to the cafeteria for lunch.

I sighed heavily and faced her, showing her how irritated I was with her asking me if I was okay a million times. But I can’t be mad at her. She was just worried about me since I almost wanted to lock myself inside my room in her condo. She has the right to worry after me.

“Look, I know you are worried about me but I’m totally fine, Bella. Really. Thank you for looking after me,” I sincerely said to her and I just found myself being hugged by her.

“What best friends are for,” she said while smiling after she let go of me. I just returned her the smile.

We were finally eating when I heard a familiar voice enter the cafeteria. Darn it! I was trying hard to avoid him since we were just on the same campus and I really hate this world being so small for the both of us to cross our paths.

“Astia…” I heard him call which made me freeze in my seat.

Here he goes…

My back was facing him and I don’t want to even turn around to see his abounded face. Urgh!

Bella stands up, “Felix, can you just have a conscience?”

I have been a bad best friend to her. She has the right to know the truth. Until now, she has no idea what was really happened to us why we ended up but she still willing to wait for me to tell her myself.

“I-” Before he could even say a word, Bella cut him off.

“Look, she won’t get back to you ever again, Felix, no matter what you do,” she said. I know that Bella was just trying to stop herself from slapping Felix since we are in a public place. There are a lot of students here in the cafeteria.

“I don’t know what exactly happened that day but it was very clear that it was your fault, Felix. Can’t you have a conscience to Audrey? She did everything just to make you happy. She sacrifices the things that make her happy just for you but then what did you do? You broke her! So let me tell you,” Bella then pointed her index finger to Felix.

“You don’t have the right now to get her back to you. Hear me? She won’t ever get back to you!” Then she pulled my hand to get out of that place.

I can feel Bella’s blood boiling inside her as she said those words to Felix. She was greeting her teeth in anger. Bella brings me to the bench and far from the cafeteria. She give me a tight hug and let me cry on her shoulders.

“I give everything just make him happy but this is what I’ll get?” I said as I continue crying on her shoulder.

I told her what exactly happened, every small detail which made her madder to Felix. I don’t know but after I told her everything that happened that day, I felt relieved. There’s no more heavy feeling inside my chest like in the past days. I wipe my tears and sighed. This is it. I’ll start again focusing on myself more. No more Felix. I’ll get that diploma once and for all. I’ll achieve my dreams without him. I can do it all by myself.

I focused on the discussions until the last subject. Bella had a different class in the last hour that’s why we aren’t in the same room. I got out of the room when my phone vibrated. I saw Bella’s name pop in.

From: Bela-Bela

You’ll go home first. Don’t wait for me. I just need to finish something.

As she said, I did go home myself. I guess it has something to do with the org she belongs to. I was in the lobby of the RA tower when I saw a familiar person that made my step slower. Oh, he’s here? How dare he show again his face!

I tried to walk as fast as I can but I heard my name being called by him. I just sighed deeply and try to calm myself.

“What do you need this time?”

He looked at me with his worried look. “She won’t let me in so I waited for you,” he said referring to the female who’s at the front desk.

“Astia… What will I do for you to forgive me?” he asked.

I faced him, “Stop chasing, Felix because no matter what you’ll do, I won’t ever get back to you anymore.”

He was just wasting his time running after me!

“I don’t understand why you can’t forgive me when in fact I just made one mistake!” Wow, I was the one who was supposed to have the right to get mad because I was the one who got betrayed.

“That’s it, Felix! You made only one mistake,” I felt my eyes water again. Darn! Here it is again. “If I just saw you with another girl, Felix. If I saw you together with another girl, that you two weren’t kissing… I might forgive you,” I said to him as we stared at each other. The tears again betrayed me. Why do I keep on crying?

“Let me ask you this if you saw me kissing another guy, will you forgive me?”

:)