Chapter 18

THEY say that dreaming is free, so keep dreaming. Make big plans. I was in my junior year of high school when I decided I wanted to be an architect. I, too, hesitated at first and became frustrated whenever the thought occurred to me, ‘What if I can't do it?’ ‘What if I don't succeed?’ ‘What if... this isn't the right path for me?’ ‘What if I'm not cut out to be an architect?’

And a slew of "what ifs." But, as Bella once said, "How will you know if you don't try?"

That question from my best friend irritates me. And I realize she's correct. There are so many what-ifs in my head that I forget I'll never know if being an architect isn't for me if I don't try. I was in my senior year of high school at the time, and I was frustrated. I was even on the verge of crying every morning because I was still undecided about which course I would take in college. I was angry at myself because my classmates knew what they wanted in college even when we were in our junior years, whereas I didn't know what I wanted. So, even though I was scared to look at the results of the college entrance examination, I told myself that even if I failed, I'd find the things that were meant for me. I was stunned and unable to move my body as soon as my eyes were drawn to the results. I couldn't believe I had passed the exam.

It was one of the most memorable moments of my life. As in, finally! That's it! When I laid my eyes on the outcome, I felt a heavyweight lift up in my chest.

I know some of us have had the thought, 'What if this thing isn't for me?' 'What if I don't succeed?' ’

We need to think positively. Remember that you shouldn't be afraid of failing; instead, you should be afraid of not trying. Because what if you tried and failed? At the very least, you don't have any regrets about not trying to find out the results. In contrast, if you don't try new things because you're afraid, you'll never know what you're missing out on. You'll never know if that thing is truly meant for you.

Our finals are supposed to be one month away, but because we have one subject for which we were assigned a task, the other subject moved the date for us to take the exam. So we only have one subject to worry about if we will pass this year.

I was tense. Who wouldn't want to? But I had planned for this. I studied day and night for this day, and it has finally arrived. I guess I'm a little prepared?

Bella stated that their exams would be a piece of cake for her, but she has been clinging to my arm since we exited the car in the parking lot. She doesn't even want to drive the car, so I drove the two of us all the way here!

"Girl, I'm scared." I sighed and slowly shook my head after hearing her words. "Whatever the outcome, at least I tried my hardest, right?" " She then turned to face me.

I shifted my gaze to her, who appeared to be in tears.

"Didn't you say last night that your exams would be a piece of cake?" I said, remembering how she said those words last night, confidently holding her head up.

“Hey! Have you forgotten about it?" She looked at me incredulously, and I silently nodded confidently.

"However-" she paused. "I retract my statement!" she exclaimed, frowning as if about to cry.

"Why are you so scared?" I tap her back. We've been reviewing for weeks, and I know you can do it!" I told her, cheering her up.

She just frowned at me more, still clutching my right arm. I sighed deeply. This is it, girl.

"How come you don't seem nervous at all?" she inquired.

"Don't be like that," I glared at her before pouting, "Don't be like that. Deep down, I was nervous. But we studied so hard, so I believe we did our best even if we fail these exams," I said, looking at her.

"Let's just do our best to complete the task," I added, winking to tease her.

She came to a halt on her feet, and because she was clinging to me, I also came to a halt and looked at her, only to see her glaring at me, but I just laughed.

“What? I'm not saying anything," I chuckled, and we kept walking.

I let out a deep sigh and placed my hand on Bella's shoulder.

"Don't worry about it; I know we can do it, okay?" As soon as we came to a halt, we locked eyes.

Bella nodded her head to me at the end, as did I to her. After that, we split up because I work in engineering and she works in business administration. When I walked into our room, I was greeted by silence. There are already a lot of students inside the room, but they aren't making any noise because their heads are down, reviewing for today's exams. I take my seat quietly and pull out my notes for a quick review.

Ms. Fabia, our professor arrived, and I swear I could feel the nervousness creeping in. As I held the pen to answer the sheets, my hand shook. In my nervousness, I could feel my heart racing as I answered.

When we finished the exam for the morning session, it was already lunchtime. Bella and I ate our lunch together before returning to our respective rooms to finish the afternoon session's exams.

Bella and I decided to meet at the bench near the cafeteria after we finished the afternoon session during lunch. I arrived before she did. She appeared to be about to cry when she was finally in front of me.

"How did your exams go?" I inquired, and she simply wrapped her arms around me.

"Do you think I got passed as well?" she replied hesitantly.

We won't know the results today; we'll have to wait until tomorrow for them to be released.

Bella and I decided to unwind at the park, so we went there. We still pick up some snacks for ourselves on the way there.

"How about we get a drink?" Bella suggested, but I shrugged and threw a snack in my mouth.

“Nah. I never want to return to that location!”

Well, I don't want what happened the last time we went there to happen again. We arrived home without knowing who had driven us there. No, thank you. I also don't want to do anything stupid while inebriated. I know I've done some stupid things when I've been drunk. In addition, because of my low alcohol tolerance, I became inebriated quickly.

We arrived home around 8 p.m. Bella went straight to her room to sleep. This day was exhausting, or at least our brain was because of the exams.

We must now prepare for that task and perform to the best of our abilities.

I was getting ready for bed when my phone vibrated, so I checked it. It was about the full details for our task in one of my professors, including what position we will be for the task, the address, the company, and the start date.

Next week, Monday.

That's great. I still have four days to get ready for this task. I drew the sheets up to my chest and sighed deeply.

This one-month task, which begins on Monday, will be hell.