Mom was in tears

The pain from that rejection back in that gym was still fresh and suffocating, but for a long while I have been trying so hard to fight it and focus on Neil and my wedding, and I had been doing well, until a few days back when Belle mentioned that she had slept with him… and now, Neil mentioned his fucking name… and that dreaded ache in my soul was growing again, eating up all the progress I have made. Especially knowing that I would see him in just a few hours, during my wedding. As one of the groomsmen of my husband-to-be.

It was going to be so difficult to see him again, and I pray, that I don’t break down and crumble from the pain that his presence would hit me with.