News of each other

About half an hour later I listened to the story of Victor's life in Jakarta. There are a lot of new things he's doing. He saw a new world and had even been abroad several times for vacation. I who always dreamed of being able to take a vacation seeing Garden by The Bay in person can only secretly envy him. I hope that feeling of envy isn't reflected clearly on my face.

"Why decide to resign? I think the promotion is very appropriate to maintain," I said as Victor ended his story.

Victor agreed with me. After that, his face quickly changed. This face, the type of face shrouded in clouds, lived in uncertainty but was eager to reach for what had been buried in his heart. "I wanted to try to realize my wish for a long time."

Victor's face shone as he said it. I've always liked people who have glowing faces like this. Generally, people who dare to pursue their dreams, are confident in themselves, and dare to take risks will look like this in my eyes.

"One day, I had the opportunity to try to make my coffee at my friend's café in Jakarta. Normally I just enjoy it, but back then, when I tried to make it myself, there was something inside me that suddenly became..., how did I explain it huh? At that time I got goosebumps. I think everything in the world doesn't matter anymore. High office and salaries. All of that I realized wasn't the purpose of my life anymore. I don't have the desire to get that high."

"I think I understand what you're saying," I said. "I also quit my regular job so I could have more time to write."

Victor's face glowed. It's like the face of an anime character I've seen. At that time, the anime character showed a happy expression when found someone who understood their feelings. That's what Victor is like right now. I'm also happy, we reconnected in this way.

"Are you still writing stories?" Victor wasn't surprised. He made sure what I was doing was as he thought.

"Yes," I nodded.

"You used to love to write. I don't think you'll be serious. Oh, I remember, you used to make comics, are you still drawing?"

That question suddenly made me sad. I've forgotten my desire to develop drawing skills.

"A lot is going on in my life. I forgot my dream of becoming a comic," I said. My voice shook.

"Why?"

"Because I didn't have a chance to develop it."

Is this what it's like to get friends to understand us? My feelings are warm. I saw his face that was concerned with me.

"You know, my family has had financial difficulties. Even if I like to draw, I won't be able to afford the equipment. I've tried to raise money from part-time work. It sparked my knowledge that making comics wasn't just pencil and paper equipment. There are many types and all of them must be bought with money. Finally, because I couldn't reach all of that, I stopped it. But, since my head was full of magical stories, I wanted to express them, so I decided to focus on writing fiction. Even if it is, my life..." I'm stuck.

"Are there still a lot of obstacles?"

I nodded sadly.

"I think there are more obstacles than I used to. Finance is the main problem. I thought that when I graduated from school, I could focus on living for myself, and I didn't."

I tried to smile.

Victor kind of understands my problem. He took a heavy breath and exhaled it slowly.

"I don't know what happened to your life. Will you tell a more detailed story?" he asked.

I felt his attention. At that moment, I was reluctant to burden him with my life story. Victor always had luck in his life. Our lives are very different. I was always on the dark side, while he was on the light side. That's how I feel. Even now, even though he hadn't seen it for twenty years, the same vibration didn't disappear at all. Suddenly I felt very poor.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable. If you don't want to tell the story, it's okay. I think I ruined the atmosphere," he said and tried to change the atmosphere between us.

His behavior made me ashamed of myself. I'm the one who ruined the atmosphere. Why should I say my life is bad?

"I think I'm the one who made the atmosphere so bad."

Silence. Victor didn't dispute my words. I didn't want to make the atmosphere worse, but I didn't know what to say. My tongue is heavy. I don't dare look him in the eye anymore.

"How did you get that place?" I asked. After a while, I tried to use this new topic. Hopefully not bad.

"That place?"

"I mean Ecology Cafe. I remember that place used to be a house and empty land. About five years ago, I lived nearby."

Victor immediately understood the meaning of my question.

"This place is recommended by my friend. The land belongs to my friend," he said in a cautious tone. As if he knew that I would feel like an unlucky person when I heard of his life journey.

"Oh, that's cool."

It felt like my tone sounded awkward. I'm afraid this meeting will be the last time. I was afraid that he would become reluctant to see me again because my expression clearly showed my wounds.

"So, I'm working with my friend. My friend invested inland and a former house, then I changed it with the capital I had. The rest is history," Victor said.

I could see the optimistic color of his words. I can't remember when I could see the colors of sounds and things. All of that I call vibration because it is shaped like a curve and colorful. I keep this a secret from everyone, even sometimes I don't want to admit to being able to see things like this.

My lips smiled automatically when Victor told me about the construction process of the building.

"The choice of exterior and interior design is cool. Where did the inspiration come from?" I asked.

"Before deciding to open my café, I observed various café themes in Jakarta and Jogja. Then I concluded that such a design would provide comfort to the customer. You know, customers in Yogyakarta are dominated by students and workers, so they all need a comfortable co-working space to study, make a thesis, do tasks, and also for workers to work. So I combined all those needs into the current design."

"Waw. That's great. You thought about it that far?"

"I don't want to fail. I think if the planning and concept are mature, this will not fail," Victor replied with a smiley face and pride in the process that has been carried out. In addition, his expression also showed concern.

"I hope everything goes well. The place is fitting the concept for co-working space," I said, trying to review honestly.

Victor couldn't believe my words.

"Believe my words. I tried it, so I know. I often move around co-working spaces. I'm looking for the right place to work. I also avoid places that are too crowded. I avoided places that might meet me with old friends. Your café fits. There is no loud music that interferes with concentration, the distance between seats between customers fits, and the minimalist interior arrangement is fitting."

"You're not shying at me, are you?"

"I am."

That's not a lie. Everything I said was real. I can feel comfortable working at Ecology Cafe. Not many cafes manage to provide comfort to work. Not many cafes also managed to show a vibe as a co-working space in Yogyakarta. Many use the concept, but they fail to assert the purpose of the café, so customers who come to make the café as a place to hang out, chatting loudly as if they were in a bar.

"In that case, you've been in Yogyakarta for a long time. You have to observe the place, see the construction of the café and others. Why are we not on the road at all? is a mystery!"

I'm trying to joke.

"It must be because our paths are different," Victor said.

I laughed.

"Right. I work from one co-working space to another co-working space. While you think about its construction. So we're different."

Victor chuckled.

"Why am I going to a co-working space? I need a discussion with the building contractor. So, at that time my only activity was an apartment and to my prospective café, going back and forth like that. At best, if there are other activities, just visit the house of my friend who returned to Jogja."

"Business people are different. CEO, fighting!"

Victor refused to be called CEO. I continued to tease him with the same words. How nice it is to be able to communicate with him again like this. As if, we never parted. It feels very familiar and feels warm in the heart.

But I was really bad because again I felt sorry for myself. I once wanted to live in an apartment, in the highest room so I wouldn't have to hear the noise of the city. However, it was never achieved. I can only stay in Kos-Kosan, a room three by three meters in size. When I heard Victor hint at living in the apartment, I was devastated. What the hell have I done so far? Why is my life so mediocre? Why hasn't there been a significant change? Until when, should I hold back?