When I vanished— it was into darkness; candles were not allowed to be
carried about, and the teacher who forsook the refectory, had only the unlit
hall, schoolroom, or bedroom, as a refuge. In winter I sought the long class-
es, and paced them fast to keep myself warm— fortunate if the moon shone,
and if there were only stars, soon reconciled to their dim gleam, or even to
the total eclipse of their absence. In summer it was never quite dark, and
then I went up-stairs to my own quarter of the long dormitory, opened my
own casement (that chamber was lit by five casements large as great doors),
and leaning out, looked forth upon the city beyond the garden, and listened
to band-music from the park or the palace-square, thinking meantime my
own thoughts, living my own life, in my own still, shadow-world.
This evening, fugitive as usual before the Pope and his works, I mounted