Abandon All Hope Ye Enter Here

I woke up from that fantastic dream that I thought I had the chance to my freedom, back to reality, it seems. I thought the nightmares were over. But it seems that it was just a happy dream that I've sought for a long time.

It is but a manifestation of myself seeking the fantasy I've wanted to live. Perhaps needed rather than just enjoying it.

It's terribly horrific just to wake back up to the apparent reality you, the reader, are living in. Perhaps all of you who've read this far already know I've gone mad, insane, lunatic. Perhaps beyond than just merely insane.

From one dissociative personality to the next, the same goes for every reality I've woken up from one time to another. It seems to never end for me, really.

How can I end the cycle of madness? Looping from the exact same thing, over and over again, repeatedly just to find nothing but pretty much the same result. Not pretty much, but literally, I must say.

Where must I go? Where must I be? Where is the actual reality? And which false dimension must I be now? Where. Am. I? What day is it? What time is it? Must I be in a mental ward in an isolation cell? Wherein… having to hallucinate all these events and the apparent reality.

Just merely an illusion, just as a coping mechanism from all the horrors of being trapped inside this forbidden and wretched place of nothing, but a spiralling staircase that descends to a rabbit hole of the void of nothingness in the psyche of lunacy.

It must be hard if I forced myself to go back to reality just to see myself trapped in a mental ward's isolation cell of a white padded room of oblivion. Must I have to go back to the horrors of false realities and nightmarish dreams?

Because you see, in a thought experiment from Vsauce. Michael experimented with a man to be isolated in nothing but boredom for straight twenty minutes, having nothing but a negative stimulation which is a controlled shock.

You press the button to feel pain. That is the only room the human specimen has in the silent room of boredom.

It turns out within the first two minutes of boredom, even though he doesn't want to push to control shock button again. He still did it anyway. Then again, after seven minutes.

Because humans are social creatures. If they get too bored and have nothing but negative stimuli. They'd rather hurt themselves in pain rather than just be bored for a long time.

That is the central theme of the experiment. Must I be isolated without any stimuli, no matter how negative or positive? Such as any type of entertainment or a feeling of pleasure or pain.

It must be terrible for me to cope with it unless I shift to another reality, having my own mind project to another consciousness of a different version of me in that universe and replace him with myself. Having him to do the same with my own version of my reality.

"It do be like that sometimes, Tea, Be, Age."