Part Five
Tears flow so effortlessly down my face as I watch my two brothers sleep so peacefully. I take in every facial feature as this will be my last time seeing them. I walk over to Anthony's side of the bed and put our favorite book to read together under his pillow and as for Andrew, he gets to finally invade my privacy and read my diary as i will no longer need it . I put my journal under his pillow and I leave a note on their dresser for both of them to read
"Hey boys , you probably woke up and ran in my room to annoy me expecting me to be there , surprise... I'm not . Truth is I wasn't as happy as it seems I wasnt happy at all , I was in pain and I've dealt with that pain for awhile so you guys wouldn't have too but , I have no strength left . Anthony and Andrew the reason you're reading this note right now is because I took my life, it's just you two now and I need you guys to look after eachother. Dont give Anthony a hard time Drew , I'm sorry I wasn't strong enough for you two."
I wipe the few tears I allowed to slip , fold the paper and leave it there being careful not to wake them . I walk into my room trying to wrap my head around what I've decided to do , I look at all my things . My clothes , my books .. all the pictures and memories me and my brothers shared
"Am I really ready to leave it all behind" I thought to myself just as I started to second guess it's like the universe could hear my thoughts as I heard his voice coming from the bathroom I knew I had no other choice all the doubt went away just as fast as it came . I grabbed my phone and rushed out the backdoor before he had fully regained his consciousness
The breeze from the chilled air flowed freely through my slightly frizzy hair, I had light long curly brown hair growing up but eventually cut it shoulder length to avoid pinning it up everyday or just doing it in general I pretty much let my hair do whatever it wants . I shivered feeling the goosebumps form on my arms , I should've probably grabbed a jacket but I didn't feel the need to , the coldness would have no affect on me soon enough. After a few more blocks and cold tears I slowly approached the downtown Bridge. The walk was no longer than 20min but it felt like forever, I stepped closer to the bridge feeling the cool breeze from the rushing waters flowing before me , I inhaled deeply taking two more steps and climbing onto the edge of the bridge I look back noticing cars slow down too look , never fully coming to a stop . " they don't even know me , why would they care" I whispered turning back to face the water I found myself not being able to move , eyes glued on the water watching the way it colladed with the rocks "its beautiful" I thought as my eyes filled with tears I closed them ready to let go of it all , be free from everything.
"Jump" was all I heard "jump. Do it" "let go".
The voice grew louder . I inhaled one last time unable to exhale as my breathe gets caught in my throat , I lift my foot off the ledge causing myself to lose balance. I felt the air around me slow down still never opening my eyes but , before I could fully fall I felt soft but strong hands grip my arms pulling me out of my trance as I felt my body fall to the ground instead of clashing with waves I opened my eyes only to see a pair looking right back at me . "Woah" was all she said .