Chapter 44

The negotiations went without a hitch. A rare occasion for me and the person responsible had kept me at his side the whole time. Our arms interlinked like a lady and gentleman and unlike the business partners we truly were.

I thought little of it as I grinned at the material we returned with.

"A monthly supply of about this much cost more than I thought… as I suspected this can only be handled by Sienna. She would know exactly how to present it best" i hummed softly as I tucked away the fabric.

Connor smiled in return, sitting beside me as the carriage made its shaky turns back to the store. We settled into a comfortable silence and I found myself shutting my eyes as I felt the warm sun on my skin. My mind catching a rare moment of peace.

"So when are you going to tell me?" I heard Connor say and shot him a questioning look. He let out a laugh at my face, "about why you have yet to fail the trials?"

I gave an awkward chuckle in reply and threw him a exasperated smile. This question had been thrown at me from every angle. From my staff, brothers and Randall. Not to mention the frequent letters from my father of which I haven't opened a single.

How could I explain that I had the choice of two impossible options while also explaining that my only way out was challenging our future king.

"I want to change Grandor" was all I said, finding the words true in a way that lacked ambition. I didn't care so much for Grandor. The way I saw it was that it was a dying nation. But somehow there was an occasional voice that asked me if I would truly give up this nation so easily?

"You want to change Grandor?" He looked intrigued, crossing his arms as his neck leaned towards me, "how so?"

"I'm not sure…" I lied, glancing away from his penetrating gaze.

"You want to be queen…" I could see the revelation dawn in his eyes as he looked at me in disbelief and… betrayal.

"Maybe not as queen" I quickly denied and then found myself revealing my other option unwillingly, "maybe as… a royal advisor?"

"You're joking" he said in all seriousness. I could see his brows raise in frustration.

"I wish I was… keep this between us until I've settled my business" I sighed, hoping I could get out of this, "if all goes well I'll be neither".

Connor was quiet for a minute, before he let a loud exhale and turned to me.

"If you expect me to keep quiet then properly explain what it is that you are worrying about. I've seen how you've been acting these last few days, so don't think I don't know" I had never heard him speak as Anastasia had described him. This was the only moment I thought she may have been telling the truth.

I stared at him.

The way his bright eyes stared resolutely at me, the way his brown hair fell over his shoulder in its wavy manner no matter how hard he tried to keep it tied away. There was genuineness in his demeanour that had me convinced he cared for me. For whatever was bothering me.

Would he understand?

I barely understood myself…

"Give me until the stores opening date, I promise I'll explain then".