motionless
Amina got up from the bed after making sure her fiancé was asleep. She hurried to the bathroom and freshened up before leaving the house. Dropping a note that she went for groceries. She could not tell him she was going to see Iyare's mother; he would start suspecting her. She and Iyare have not been in touch for over a year after Iyare dropped out of school, but she learnt about her death since a few news sites captured the fire incident.
She carefully analyse the situation; even if Iyare's laptop got stolen or sold out after her death, it is not an easy fit to find her. She had personally taught Iyare how to do that. There was only one possibility in her mind.
Someone must have caused or faked Iyare's death. Maybe it was related to the last people she worked for. Amina has been trying to hide from them for months.
Maybe they found out about Iyare. She knew those people were dangerous and would go to any lent to get what they wanted. She was beginning to have the feeling that Iyare was alive and that whoever was found dead in her room may not be her. So she decided to See Iyare's mother; she just hoped the woman would be willing to speak to her about Iyare.
After driving for thirty minutes, Amina parked her car and walked to the front door. She took a deep breath before knocking. Iyare's mother opened the door after a few minutes. At that time of the day, she was left alone in the house. Her husband has gone to work; their last son was in high school.
"Mrs Ose, my name is Amina. I am friends with Iyare," Amina introduced herself with a smile.
"Iyare is dead," Mrs Ose replied and was about to shut the door.
"I know that. I actually came here to see you because of that," Amina replied. She knew that Iyare's family cared nothing about her. She had imagined them throwing a big party to celebrate the death of their daughter.
Amina never understood why a mother could hate a child so much. Unless the child was never hers, or maybe she got raped.
"We don't talk about her in this house," Mrs Ose replied impatiently and tried to shut the door again. Amina reacted quickly and used her hands to stop the door. "I don't know why a mother will hate their child so much, but I am not here to find out why. I just want to know if her body was found in the fire?"
"Yes, her body was found in the fire burnt beyond recognition." Mrs Ose answered impatiently.
" Oh!" Amina said, simple. She had watched the news about the fire. It did not look like something that would burn someone beyond recognition. Suffocating should be the only possible cause of death, especially since the fire service arrived on time at the scene. The news did say the fire was caused by gas. But after the message yesterday, Amina was beginning to doubt many things.
"Anything else," Mrs Ose snapped at Amina angerly.
Amina shakes her head, "did you find anything strange about the fire?" Amina asked on second thought. "Nothing seems strange, our neighbours left their gas on, and the fire caught up to our apartment," Mrs Ose replied.
Mrs Ose was curious about why a young lady would suddenly appear at her front door asking about Iyare. Unfortunately, this was not a topic she enjoyed talking about, so she immediately slammed the door at her. She did not even know why she bothered answering her questions at all.
After slamming the door, she broke down into tears. She felt guilty about Iyare's death. What kind of a mother kills their child. She never thought that Iyare's death would hurt that much. She felt that once Iyare was out of her life, she would forget about that man.
She will forget all about him. She will forget loving him, but that was not what happened. She felt guilty. And for the first time in her life, she thought she was the family's bad luck.
"I am sorry," she whispered in between her sob. "I could not love you. I could not love our daughter. My love was weak, and my faith in us was weak. That's why you never made it into the new life you promised me.
Do you hate me now?" she asked, looking at the old picture she held in her arms. Twenty years ago, she destroyed everything she had about the love of her life, except one of his pictures. She could not bring herself to burn them all.
Tears ran down her eyes. "I should have loved her, protected her, but what did I do. I ensured her death. She was the fruit of our love, but I called her a curse. Maybe our love was a curse because of me. I was so weak. Perhaps I never really understood what love meant. How can I love you but hate her? How was that possible? she cried.
Mrs Ose stopped, blinked her eyes twice and stopped crying like someone pressed the switch. "it was not my fault. You should have come for me as promised. You lied to me; my life is miserable because of you. So what! I have taken care of her for 25 years; I guess it's
She used the back of her hands to clean the dropping tears. "I will never cry for you or your daughter again," she reassures herself as she looked at the picture as though the person she was speaking to could hear her.
Then she got up from the floor behind the door and found a chair to sit on. A small smile played on her face at her decision. Memories of their time together flash through her mind. No, I want to forget all about you, she screamed as she kept hitting her head on the chair like a lunatic. She did not stop until there was blood dripping down her face.
She wondered if the pain she felt in her heart was her punishment for killing her daughter. What kind of a mother kills their daughter. She locked the door that morning to ensure Iyare death. At first, when her body was found, she felt relieved to know Iyare was gone. But when she saw her daughter burnt beyond recognition, she felt a familiar pain in her heart.
She felt the same pain when she concluded that Iyare's father was dead. She felt heartbroken, and slowly the guilt slipped into her heart. She remained motionless as the blood dripped