Click Here for the REAL STORY PART 2

[The System commands you to tell it, how you managed to cheat]

Cheat? How the hell do you expect me to be able to cheat? It was not like I could shoot a mind control ray out of my butt cheeks. Literally, the only thing I had been doing was standing around"

[The system agrees that its host intelligence is far too lacking to accomplish such a feat. The System would now read the Script and advises not to do anything stupid.]

[... after the mission starts the host would walk through the main entrance and was to be smashed by the 2 comically large wooden logs. System would then remark that "Host would have received his morning Wood… Readers then laugh.]

[Host would respawn and choose a different approach. Climbing through a window and would once again be greeted by a gigantic wooden log. Readers would laugh again]

[Host would respawn and mention that life was hard. Audience laughs again]

I did not know about what I should be offended more. Was it the fact that I should be killed by the System or the bad puns? Definitvely the bad puns.

You could kill me as brutally as you wanted to, but leave poor English out of this; it had done nothing wrong.

Readers might trample on proper spelling and grammar. We, authors, should be better though. An author should write even more stupid than their readers to make them feel good about themselves.

[After extensive research through the master plan; it could be concluded that the MC could never have been satisfied in a matter of seconds.]

[The result of this mission is ruled as a bug and the event was going to be restarted once more. Host should therefore be happy to be granted another chance to be forgiven]

[Commence mission restart in 3…2…1…GO]

Damn, I am all out of luck. A bug like this would never ever happen again. The world began to move again and my difficult mission started once again.

I took a single step…

[Your target Jan Itor has fully forgiven you]

Yeah, this was rigged. System fix your god damn story. I wanted forgiveness one step at a time─not be forgiven for taking a single step forward.

[Your target does seem to be quite the trickster. The MC and Friends system would appreciate it, if every party involved would regard this topic with the seriousness it deserved.]

[Commence mission restart in 3…2…1…GO]

This time I simply took one step again and waited for a few seconds. No success message greeted me this time.

The third time seemed to be the real beginning of my journey of apologies. If not for the next system message.

[Your target Jan Itor has fully forgiven you]

I could not work like this. Seriously, System fix this mess of yours. How do you expect me to become a better human if nothing works as it was supposed to? These bugs were killin' me.

Without any word the MC and Friends system restarted the mission several times, but that was to no avail.

I was always forgiven after taking a step.

We both were visibly confused about how someone that hated me more than anything in the world was forgiving me in a few seconds. Neither of us could explain the weird behaviour.

[Did you give the main character any weird diseases or does he suffer from amnesia?]

No, as far as I remember he was just some random dude. Someone that entered the wrong door and became the only normal dude in a world full of main characters.

Cuz you know, main characters are not exactly the most rational beings.

To me, it seemed very funny to have an average dude, with a very average worldview, surrounded by these wild fellas.

The more absurd the situation, the more fun. Much like the fan service of burly, naked men blowing cold air into your face; everything needed to be over the top.

[The system has come to the conclusion that the character must be clinically insane, therefore no logical approach could be used.]

Our desired answer came in the form of my clone carrying a bucket, a mop and a broom. It was this story's favourite Janitor.

"You might be confused why I was so quick to forgive you "Author". The reason for that was actually very simple. This world was by far the best world to be stranded in."

???? What was he saying? What was that reasoning?

Jan looked at his creator and shook his head.

"Look, I still hate you to the bottom of my heart. But how could I not forgive you, when I saw what you did to everyone else? All that needs to be done here is defeating some monsters in a dungeon and clean up puke."

Well, he had a point there. Jan really got lucky in comparison to all the other people. He had fan service, plenty of fun activities and even a cheap living place.

" And I truly thought to myself, was this world not too good for my author to learn forgiveness? " said the main character with a shit-eating grin on his face.

"You see, this place was full of wonderful things to enjoy. System we both can agree that there is no fun in giving the Author that kind of luxury."

[The system praises the character Jan Itor for its clever insights.]

The main character who would definitely get deleted once I was out of here, simply gave the system a big thumbs up. While I wanted nothing more than to show both of them my middle finger.

I was more than certain that this sort of "forgiveness" was not something the system had intended.

True forgiveness was most certainly not about sending your own Author straight to hell. Where was the gratitude for creating this wonderful world?

[The MC and Friends system congratulates the host for successfully being forgiven]

[Host will be transported to his next destination in 10 seconds. Please say your goodbyes.]

There was so much to say, and none of it was nice.

[10 seconds are far too long; the dimension crossing starts immediately.]

A big hole opened up below my feet and before I could say "What a lazy and boring sequence to start the next world", I was swallowed whole.

As my body was being pulled to certain death, an unnamed main character, let's call him Jan, was blowing me a kiss and waving me goodbye.

It would have been a lot more touching if I did not know better. This world was perfect; I did not want to go just yet…

These ungrateful bastaaaards…

And then I was transported to the most insane setting I had at my disposal. A realm full of my clones…

[Welcome to the world of: Me, myself and I]