The Great Candied Adventure, Part 5

Chapter 5: Sheila and the Crystal Marshmallow

Big Ma'am

Black John Licorice returned to his ship and threw the captured Chef Pierre against the wall. "Uck! Incroyable! Do you happen to know who I am? I am the world-renowned ice cream chef, Pierre Glacé!"

"I know ye are." Black John smirked with malice. "That's why yer a vital asset to our plans."

"Mw-mw." They looked as Maggie returned, the one-foot-high child hauling the lunky form of Arthur Glacé in his freeze suit. Black John hauled the frostbit man out of his suit and stuck him inside a freezer with a glass door.

"Vait! He can't be out of his suit or-"

"Don't worry, we'll keep him cool." John assured as he put the mech-suit up against the wall. "As long as ye be 'cool' with us. We're well aware o' your skill in bakery, having constructed an ice cream cake SO massive, you c'n have a swarm of yer frosty delivery boys living in it. Why, even our young time-traveler here experienced it." He spared a glance to Rick Strowd, still examined by Lala. "Had it not been for him, we never woulda discovered what ye looked like. Convenient ya happened to be roaming around the Mountain o' Flavors. 'Tis why our ships were there in the first place."

"And just vhat is it you malveillant thugs vant, ahh?"

"We have a fancy for delicious cakes as well, and we are creating one that surpasses all others. But our quest be candyless, without one of true culinary know-how. 'Tis where you come in. As soon as the necessary ingredients are in our possession, YOU will be tasked with constructing the marvelous delicacy. Otherwise, yer son may be set out to defrost." He smirked threateningly at the refrigerated Arthur.

"You vill not treat a high-class chef this vay!"

"Noooo, of course not." John bowed. "Ye actually deserve MUCH worse treatment! But for the occasion, just yer son. So SIT down and be a good hostage, Snail Boy! Oh… and we've recruited yer men, too. Stewie's organizing them out front."

Like he said, Stewie Griffin had the Ice Cream Men in perfect rows on the deck. "Men, you are now official crewmen of the Big Mom Pirates. From this day forth, you will be surrounded by seamen. Sperm whales and seamen. …Ooh, a swallow!" Said bird flew overhead.

"Stewie, quit bein' queer and tell 'em to whip me up a chocolate sundae." Rallo demanded.

"Yeah yeah, you settle down. Alright, so we're basically hunting these rare types of candies, why?, because these people have nothing better to do. Probably plenty of gold mountains we can acquire with our strength, but we'll settle for candy. So keep an eye out for any ships with raccoon heads, and yes, get Rallo a chocolate sundae. Ooo, and get me a vanilla-strawberry!" He said with a more positive smile. "Oh, but NO sprinkles!!" Back to anger. "For any sprinkle I find… I shall kill you."

Sunny Day (Play "Ending 17" from One Piece.)

About 2:00 in the afternoon. The seas felt very gloomy today. Little wind and waves, and the sun blocked by gray clouds. A little bit of light could be seen, but they felt no warmth. Everyone was lied down on the deck. It was hard to want to be active and excited when it was this cloudy. They wondered if it would rain anytime soon. It would be their first storm they'd have to tackle on the sea. All they could do now was lie flat and face directly up. Their raccoon Jolly Roger blowing in the light breeze. The gray clouds slowly drifting away. They awaited the very first raindrop to put a chill on their face. Kick in their nervous system and force them to move.

They barely forgot they weren't technically part of the Kids Next Door right now. They were pirates sailing calmly on the sea. They forgot about being on a crucial mission to rescue a friend. Pirates had no real missions they had to complete, all they had were the seas and freedom. It was a whole different air. No pressure on their shoulders, no rush they were in. That's what it felt like on these open seas. But they couldn't forget, they were on a mission. They knew they had to stop these Big Mom Pirates and rescue their friend. In doing so, they had to act like pirates themselves. So they weren't tracked, had no time quota… completely defected. They were totally free. It was their disguise… and the hardest part, was remembering it was disguise. They wondered if their own captain even remembered, or if she was doing this on purpose.

"Turn your CD player off, Harry." Aurora said.

"Fine." he sighed, flipping it off. (End song.) "Gettin' too reflecty, anyway."

"Siiiiiiiiiiiigh." Artie sighed in dreariness. "Sailing is boring."

"Yeah, but it was the best thing about Wind Waker." Haylee said.

"Whaddo you think everyone else is doin' right now?" Mason asked.

"Not our concern, Mate." Sheila replied, seated on the keel and faced directly ahead. "We put aside our worries for everyone else when we became pirates. Even if we're gonna save Panini… we can't be worried for her."

"I know, I'm just… saying."

"Siiigh, when are we gonna get to the next ISLAND?" Carol whined.

"As soon as we find out where the Eight Wonders are." Haylee replied. "We know their names, it's just the location…"

"Aren't the Magic Caramels in Guatemala?" Harry asked.

"Yeah, but there's the whole 5th month, 5th year thing, we need more information on that."

Sheila's raccoon ears perked when another sound filled the air: the rushing sound of a propeller. "What in blazes is that??"

Everyone looked up as a helicopter flew overhead and came down. The KNN newscopter hovered beside their ship as Melody Jackson jumped out. Eric aimed the camera as the Jackson girl spoke in a microphone, the propeller blowing her long hair.

"This is Numbuh 10.11, live on the Sunny Day, vessel of newly-defective operatives, Sector V." She held the mike at them and spoke, "So Sector V, now that you're full-fledged pirates who were tired of Kids Next Door's ways, can we expect an invasion anytime soon?"

"We're NOT defective operatives," Chris slapped it away, "and how did you even find us?"

"We interrogated Sheila's mom, gained info on the Ice Cream Men's activity from Cheren, and worked from there!" she spoke perkily.

"Great, so why don't you leave and let the pirates do their thing."

"Let me join your group! After all, this is reminiscent of my mom's little adventure. Heck, who better to have on the sea than the Ocean Princess herself?"

"You're a princess?" Carol beamed. "You HAVE to tell me your preferences in dresswear!"

"You can't join the crew, Mate." Sheila spoke, having turned on her perch to face her, "Not until you know the real commitment it takes to be an honest-to-goodness pirate."

"We never made any commitment." Aurora spoke.

"You'll get it, eventually."

"Besides, we're supposed to be defective from the Kids Next Door, so you can't do your KNN thing." Chris smirked.

"But I'm a waterbender."

"Makes things too easy, Mate." Sheila stated. "May as well just sail on back."

"Fiiiine." Melody stepped back on her copter with Eric. "But not to get in your business, but we saw a few of those Candy Pirates' ships parked at Bully Island just to the west of here."

"Bully Island?!" Dillon perked in remembrance. "Wait a sec! Back at Punk Hazard, one of Caesar's shipping points was Bully Island!"

"Hey, yeah!" Haruka remembered. "Maybe Big Mom collects Devil Fruits from there!"

"But doesn't that nerdy kid live there? You know… Whatshisface?" Chris asked.

"Well, whatever the case, it's clearly not our biz, so we'll buck off." Melody decided as the newscopter flew away. "Not our fault if you decide to follow us west!"

"Yeah yeah, I know my directions." Haylee spoke, already getting ready. "Set our course to starboard, we're gonna tango with the bullies!"

Bully Island

The sky became less cloudy as rays of sunlight were piercing through. Three candied ships docked off the island's shore, forcing the Sunny to park several miles away. "The Big Moms are here, all right." Chris observed.

"Are they after more Devil Fruits?" Mason asked.

"Either way, this could be our chance to acquire information on the Sugary Wonders' whereabouts." Haylee said.

"You're right, but we don't wanna engage in any big fights right now." Aurora noted. "Let's hide the ship behind those rocks and send Dillon and Kirie over to collect info. Sheila, you-" They suddenly noticed their captain was nowhere to be found. They looked in the water as Sheila swam to the island herself and climbed onto the shore where the ships were docked.

"HELLOOOO Bully Island! Give Sun-Fist Sheila the BIGGEST wedgie you got! If you CAN, anyway! HA HA haaaa!"

"It's her!!" a pirate exclaimed. "Skewer her!" A swarm charged out as Sheila began to dodge and punch.

"Siiigh. Just get going, now." Harry stated.

"Oh! And if you could, look for any solar panels!" Artie requested. "The island base would have to have a few!"

"Roger that." Dillon nodded. "Let's go, Kirie!" (Play the "Lightfoot Village" theme from Star Fox Adventures.)

Stage 6: Bully Island

Mission: Acquire info on the Sugary Wonders' locations.

While the Sunny Day sailed behind a group of jagged rocks, Dillon grabbed Kirie and Shadow Glided to a cliff filled with trees and shrubs. They stepped down a short slope and peeked through some shrubs as a group of Noogie Raptors walked by. They quietly followed the bullies into an open area where other Noogie Raptors were torturing Shy Guys. However, Spark Guys ran in from behind to stun the bullies with electrified bodies, then dragged them away. Dillon and Kirie exchanged curious looks before continuing ahead.

They got to an electric fence that Dillon Shadow Veiled them under, viewing an open yard where Shy Guys tried to control Baseballosaurs. There was an exit across the field, but it seemed unsafe to Shadow Veil all the way across. Dillon and Kirie snuck behind a few metal barrels and made it to a spot where a sun ray shone through the clouds. Dillon stood there and stretched his shadow out to catch a nearby Baseballosaur whose back was turned. Dillon possessed it via the shadow and forced it to whack a baseball into the control tower window on their left. A group of Shy Guys charged over to tame the bully, so Dillon and Kirie got away before they were noticed. With the Shy Guys all distracted, the two kids hurried to the exit.

They followed a narrow, curvy path down a hill and got to a beach before a lake. The area was covered with snow as two Snowballosaurs were creating ugly snowmen that resembled their selves. The left one looked at the other's and started pointing and laughing, so the right one chucked a snowball at him. The right one started laughing then, so the left chucked his entire snowman to cover him. Hey, that's not how you treat snowmen!

The bully heard Kirie's shout (again, ?) and growled, beginning to chuck snowballs at them. Dillon Shadow Veiled and got beneath the bully to punch him upside the head. The other bully recovered as Kirie ran over to spin and kick him in the side of the head. Dillon's Snowballosaur raised a giant snowball, but Dillon stretched Mario to punch the creature's knees and make him drop the snowball on himself. Kirie was still battling her bully, but Dillon found a patch of sunlight and stood in to catch the bully in a Shadow Possession. He forced the bully to roll up a giant snowball and roll that snowball across the lake to make a frosty trail. Dillon and Kirie crossed the lake, which would otherwise be unswimmable with all the Splashosauruses.

They made it to another wide field where Footballosauruses roamed. Kirie snuck up on the first one from behind and tapped his shoulder, slipping behind when he turned. She swiped his football and tossed it at another, so when the first turned around, he was already accused by the second. The two ended up in a brawl that the others joined, so the duo snuck over to the far left corner and climbed a short cliff. They trekked up a hill to another prison yard, where Spitballosaurs stood guard with spit-loaded straws aimed. Dillon and Kirie spotted the main control tower, previously home to Jerry Rassic. It was protected by an electric fence, which had no gaps in which to sneak under. The fence had four generators on different parts.

The Spitballosaurs were conveniently beside barrels of spit, which the two used to hide behind. When they had to sneak around the front of one, Kirie tapped its shoulder to make it turn, allowing them to sneak. There were four different sun patches around the field, so Dillon made it to each one and used Shadow Possession on a bully. He aimed that bully's spitball at a generator and fired to destroy it. Before it could warn the others, Dillon used the Shadow Strangle to knock it out. The two eventually managed to take out all the generators, and the electric switched off.

Dillon and Kirie snuck over to the fence and were able to Shadow Veil underneath without risk of electrocution. They kept the Shadow Veil to avoid the cameras around the building, backing flat against the front door of the tower. Kirie used the tip of her fan to pick the door's lock, and succeeded in gaining them entry. They snuck inside and went up the staircase to peek in the control room. There stood none other than Fat Jack, talking to a hunchbacked man with a scrunchy face. (End song.)

"So let me get this straight." Jerry Rassic spoke. "You wish to use my Bullysaurs as extra force to hunt for these… candies?"

"That's right, ahhhhh, I heard you make 'em from Nightmare Substance you got from your dad. Mom likes that stuff, ahhhhh, it's why she orders Bang Gas here."

"Hmmmm. But seeing as how I already let you pirates use this underground transport here, I feel I deserve a little more compensation."

"We'll give you a slice of the cake, ahhhh."

"No thanks… I'm lactose intolerant. I was more along the lines of REVENGE AGAINST THE KIDS NEXT DOOR- ow."

"Ahhhh we'll do so, then. We really just wanted to send more defensive down at Marshmallow Mayans, ahhhh, down there in that North South America."

Dillon and Kirie exchanged excited smiles. "Sure, sure…" Jerry agreed. "And as for when I'll take my payment, I'll settle with… RIGHT NOW!" He whipped around Fat Jack and shocked Dillon and Kirie with his cane, making them sink to their knees as they stuttered. "Thought you could sneak onto MY island, HUUUH? Just like those Kids Next Dorks 20 years ago."

"Who the heck are you?" Dillon asked.

"WHAT THE- You STILL don't remember who I AM?? I'M JERRY RASSIC!! Not that you'll have much time to remember it. Because when Wedgiesaurus gets through with you, YOU'RE gonna wish-"

"Rooooaaarrr!" Jerry and Jack turned toward the window, seeing their patrolling Spitballosaurs cowering.

"YAAAAAHOOOO!" The Wedgiesaurus came charging in with none other than Sheila Frantic on its head. The large bully's underwear was over his head, and Sheila was yanking it to control him. "Here's Sheila Frantic, BULLY conqueror!"

"STOP HEEEERR!" Jerry cried as his Spitballosaurs lined up to shoot the Wedgie Rex. He swung his tail and whacked the bullies away, then charged straight for the tower. He jumped and allowed Sheila to fling through the windows, kicking Jerry against Jack, against the wall.

"Man, this island's a riot, you guys! These big ol' blokes think they're dinos!"

Let's just get OUTTA here, Sheilaaa! Kirie cried.

"Wait, does this building have solar panels?" Dillon asked. "Artie wanted us to collect some."

"No problem! 'EY! Crater Face!" she yelled at the saurus. "Get me some of 'em roof mirrors!"

"Rooooo." The Wedgiesaurus climbed up the tower and plucked two solar panels off, dropping down and presenting them to Sheila.

"They're all apples, mates! Now let's go!" Sheila hopped on the panels, and her friends joined as the bully charged off.

Fat Jack recovered and kicked off the wall, flying directly above the Wedgiesaur in the sky. "Ten-Ton Tumble DOWN." Fat Jack fell fast and CRUSHED the Bullysaur, sending the kids flying.

They rode the panels like snowboards and swiftly navigated the trees and rocks as they slid downhill. "WHOOOoooaaa!" The edge of the island curved up like a ramp, allowing them to soar high and land perfectly on their ship. "UUUH!"

"Oh great, you're back!" Aurora perked.

"And you brought the panels!" Artie noticed.

"Yeah, so raise the anchor, let's get going, we're heading south!" Dillon said rushedly as he and Kirie began to unfurl the sails. Haylee grabbed the helm and turned it forcefully to turn the ship south, sailing away as the Big Mom ships were already giving chase.

Further out at sea

"So Big Mom was really using that place to buy Devil Fruits?" Haylee asked.

"Yeah, and apparently those bullies were made from Nightmare Substance." Dillon recapped. "Jerry's dad must be a customer of Nightmare Enterprises."

Artie peeled off a small portion of the solar panels and fixed them on the back of the metal gloves. "Finished! Sheila, if you put these on, the panels will absorb solar energy into the gloves, and mixed with your own lightbending, your punch can become even stronger! Of course, you would have to hope for a sunny day to be able to use these, heh."

"Every day's a sunny day for me, mates." Sheila grinned.

"So we're heading to the Marshmallow Mayans, huh?" Aurora confirmed.

"I should've expected as much." Haylee replied. "I heard legends of a Crystal Marshmallow that was treasured by an ancient civilization. But not even my mom's seen it, but judging by what that pirate said, it must exist."

"Why would anyone want a Crystal Marshmallow?" Chris asked. "Hurt your teeth if you ask me."

"It's actually a shell of rock candy, delicacy for earthbenders. Or anyone with strong teeth. But in its heart lies the squishiest, juiciest, most succulent marshmallow you've ever seen." Haylee's eyes watered just thinking about it.

"Well, if I have to eat a whole crystal shell just to get it, count me out." Carol stated. "I'll get my construction crew to drill it out."

"You know, Mars is well-known for their vast growth of marshmallows." Haylee noted. "My mom even said the Mayans may've had ties with the Martians. Even they could've given them the Marshmallow."

"Well, if the Big Moms already know about it, we better hurry." Harry said.

"Yeah, like, fast! They're coming now!" Aurora yelled, pointing at the trio of ships behind them, which were shooting jawbreaker cannonballs.

"All cobbers GET TA battle stations!" Sheila declared.

"Dun dun duh, dun dun, duh dun dun, duh DUH DUH DUH," Artie sang as he loaded their cannons and blasted back, "dun dun duh, dun dun, duh dun dun-" Sheila punched him with a sphere.

"Oi, if yer gonna hum, sing PIRATES, not cruddy Star Wars! You should've did that during the N.E.C.S.U.S. journey!"

"Fine! RAH DUN DUN DUH DUNUH! DA DA DUH DUNUH! Da da da dunuh! DA DA duh dun!"

A group of Jacketdactyls flew overhead with Footballosaurs riding them, throwing exploding footballs down. Sheila spun her fist and fired a Light Sphere that bounced off one Footballosaur, and knocked all the others down. As for the Jacketdactyls, they panted heavily when Carol raised a dollar bundle, throwing it into the ocean as the bullies shot down to retrieve it. The candy ships still fired as the Raccoon Crew tried to counter.

"You know, I kinda missed it when we were lying on the deck in boredom." Aurora remarked.

"I have an idea." Artie spoke. "Mason and Haruka, try and whip up a gas cloud." The two stood on the back ledge and chugged down several sodas, using all their strength to create a gas cloud big enough to swallow the three ships. "Now Chris and Aurora, you know what to do." The two nodded and tossed a ray of flames to set the foggy gas on fire and burn the ships to rubble.

"ALL RIGHT!" Mason and Haru cheered. "WE DID IT- oh?" One of the candy ships merely sailed around the fog and stayed on their tail.

"Siiiigh." Aurora moaned. "Any more brilliant plans?"

"Arrrrgh, can't we use the blooming gloves?" Sheila asked.

"Sure, if you can point me to any sun." Artie stated.

"Hey! There's a sunspot over there!" Dillon yelled, pointing to a ray of sun a few yards off the starboard.

"Ah'm GOIN' for it, Mate!" Sheila declared as she took the metal gloves and swam for the sunray.

"Hurry, Sheila!" Haruka yelled as the pirates still bombarded them with cannonballs.

The raccoon captain swam as fast as she could to the patch of sun and held her Solar Fists under to charge power. Mason and Haruka drank sodas to try and burp Gas Bombs at the enemy ship, but they shortly became breathless, considering their previous attack. Sheila felt she couldn't wait to get back to her ship, so she spun her tail to hover above the water and spun her fists. They were heavier because of the gloves, but she felt a stronger surge of energy charging within. She felt a powerful sun burning within her, waiting to shine forth. She kicked in her Mobian senses and sprinted her feet along the water's surface. Their weight lightened and allowed her to run on the water, and she headed straight for the candy ship. "Huuuuuu-YAH!!"

The ship vanished in a great explosion of light, becoming a mini sun on this gloomy sea. Sheila flew from the explosion with a bright and vibrant face, landing swiftly on the Sunny's deck. "Well, those cobbers will need a whole load of sunblock. Now, who's ready to get on with this adventure?"

"AYYYYE-aye!"

Marshmallow Mayans

The Sunny Day made it to South America's northern coast and parked beside a small strip of land that served as a pier. There were more blue patches in the sky now, so they hoped the mood would be a little brighter. Also that it wouldn't rain. They stepped off the ship and viewed the ancient ruins that covered the landscape ahead. "Ahhhh, the Marshmallow Mayans." Sheila sighed. "I can already smell the ancient history. Just think, mates, when our towns are all bombed and ruined a hundred years from now, explorers will come to study our remains. A civilization's old legacy becomes the future blokes' adventure."

"And Darkrai's pain in the butt when he tries to give them a nightmare." Haylee remembered.

"This already feels like an Indiana Jones adventure!" Artie mentioned. "Just imagine, we'll set off some kinda trap that makes the door close on us! Then we'll slide under as I drop my hat, and at the last second, I reach back and SNATCH it! Or maybe Harry can do it!"

"Not unless it's my CD player."

"Then I hereby call this journey 'Sheila Frantic and the Kingdom of the Crystal Marshmallow'!" Sheila fist-palmed. "We'll snatch their treasure and show the old Mayans their traps failed! I mean, what's in there that we haven't seen-" She stepped forward and pressed a panel, causing a group of arrows to launch from the sea and stick her tail. "YOW!" She looked at her tail, which now looked like a porcupine.

"None that ever had a chance to do that." Harry said.

"Sigh… let's just go." (Play "Ruin Rhapsody" from Donkey Kong Returns.)

Stage 7: Marshmallow Mayans

Mission: Locate the Crystal Marshmallow.

Act 1

The pirates began to cross the pier- WAIT!, but Kirie ran back and glided to a small platform just off the pier, grabbing a Gold Wonka Bar. "Hooray for collectables behind the starting point." Aurora remarked. The team proceeded to the shore and followed a trail between some ruins. They stepped on some panel traps that launched darts from the sides, but they only dealt a little damage, so it was no big deal. They reached a short pit with a fallen totem and dropped down, seeing their next path was on a cliff on the left. They spotted a large marshmallow like the one from Mountain of Flavors, but when they tried to take it, a large stone tiki pulled it in with his tongue. "Hey, give it back!" Aurora yelled.

"NO! You want Fun-Fun, you bring Gum-Gum. You got that, Dum-Dum?"

"Well, we got Sheila, she's close enough." Harry said.

"Not Gum-Gum Fruit! Good ol' fashion Gum-Gum! Okay, Dum-Dum?"

"You Dum-Dum." Harry glared. The 11 searched the area and found a small, narrow tunnel with a bottomless pit, and a platform with gum on a pedestal on the other side. Sheila was about to Wall Jump, but Kirie stopped her and indicated the holes on the ceiling, meant to shoot darts if Sheila kicked off a panel. For that reason, Kirie decided to go herself. She slipped her shoes off and Wall Jumped across, the panels gone unpressed under her light feet. She retrieved the gum and jumped back so they could slip the gum in the tiki's mouth.

The stone idol chewed before blowing a great big bubble, and the kids watched as he flew very high into the sky. The Mega Marshmallow was left behind, but the kids kept watching as he shrank into a tiny dot, then vanished. "…He's not coming back." Haylee said.

"Farewell, Dum-Dum." Harry said.

The crew rolled the marshmallow under the ledge and used it to bounce up. They came to another pit with the next path directly across, and a barren tree on the left that stretched a limb above the middle. The group dropped down in the pit and found another large marshmallow in the enclosing behind the tree. However, it was smaller than the other, light enough to pick up. Sheila tried to bounce on it, but it was far too weak. "Well, this mallow's a little short-sighted."

"That ones a Branchmallow, supposed to be sticky enough to hang from branches." Haylee explained. "Of course, it helps to warm it up-"

"Done." Chris set the marshmallow on fire, causing it to shrink and vanish. The nearby tiki spat out another one.

"-using… the local grill." Haylee finished.

"They thought up everything, didn't they?"

They saw a small grate in the ground on the right of the pit, with burning charcoals underneath. Sheila carried the Branchmallows and set it on to make it slightly melted. "Mmm, that smells good, actually!" Carol perked, deciding to have a bite. "Mmm…mmmmm?" Her mouth became clogged by the gooeyness.

"It's supposed to be very sticky, too." Haylee noted.

"Mmmmmm? Mmmmmm!!!"

"That should hopefully last a while." Mason smirked.

Sheila tossed the Branchmallow up the stairs out of the pit, then hurled it onto the tree branch's tip. Part of the marshmallow dripped down, dangling like a sticky rope, allowing the group to swing it and cross the pit, but their hands became a little sticky. Before they continued, Kirie noticed a ledge in the enclosing behind the tree and jumped over to grab another Gold Wonka Bar. Afterwards, they arrived at a piranha-filled river where marshmallows flowed down, lying on their sides. They each hopped on a marshmallow and had to balance on it like logs, rapidly rushing their feet to make it roll. Lockjaws circled them from below before jumping and attempting to snack them, so they had to maneuver around. They eventually flowed to a large waterfall and fell down, where they jumped off onto a safe ledge that led inside a temple.

They crossed the first path and reached a large gap where the river still flowed with marshmallows. The next ledge was too high to ride the marshmallows to, and while there was room underneath, a wall would block them ahead while letting the marshmallows flow under. "Hey, you!" yelled a wall tiki on the right of the gap. "You want cross Chum-Chum, you bring Gum-Gum! Am I done-done?"

"I wish." Harry said. They noticed a gum piece on a small platform on the bottom of the wall beneath the next foothold. Sheila just had to balance the floating marshmallows, grab the gum, and jump back. She tossed the gum into the tiki's mouth, letting it chew and release bubblegum balls which they used to bounce up. From there, they overlooked a wider part of the river where the marshmallows ended up sinking down whirlpools. There was a vine wall along their left they could use to climb to the path on the other side, but they noticed a Branchmallow hanging from a stalactite above the center of the river. Sheila threw a Light Sphere and made it drop, then quickly glided over to land and balance it across the river, navigating the whirlpools.

The others climbed across the vine wall and met up with Sheila on the safe ledge. She picked the Branchmallow up and carried it into the next cave, which became a long tunnel with several platforms leading to higher ground. A group of Ice Cream Men came flying in on jetpacks, aiming to shoot the captain. Chris blocked their ice creams with fireballs as Sheila ran ahead, tossing the Branchmallow onto each individual platform to take it higher. Two more Ice Cream Men attempted to blast Sheila, but Kirie jumped between them, kicked them to make them turn, and tricked them to shoot each other.

Sheila made it to the end of the tunnel and reached an outside area. She set the Branchmallow on a grill before throwing it onto a branch to swing across a pit. The others caught up after defeating the Ice Cream Men and swung to the next foothold. However, there was already another branch, so they followed the path on the left of this ledge to find a solution. They stood on a slightly high ledge over a river where a plesiosaur floated, and a Branchmallow sat on a platform on the other side. They would need to ride the plesiosaur and carry the marshmallow to throw it onto their foothold, otherwise they couldn't push it up from the water.

"Carol, lure the plesiosaur over with your money." Artie told her.

"Mmm. Mmm-mmmmm mm." She indicated her still-glued mouth and shook her head.

"Come on, Carol, just do it." Mason sighed.

"Mmm-mmmmm…" She insisted.

"Sigh, fine, I'll get it off." He was about to take the marshmallow off, but-

"MMM!" Carol stopped him. "Mmm-mmm mmm-mmm, mmmmmm-mmm." Her eyes furrowed.

"What?!"

"Mmm-mmmmmm-mm." She looked smugly.

"Siiiigh. Fine." With that, Mason pressed his lips against hers and tried to eat the squished marshmallow off. However, his lips ended up stuck, and both of theirs were forced together. Carol closed her eyes and wrapped arms around Mason. A dim light shone on them as they engaged in the most romantic kiss of, er, Carol's life.

"Ugh." Chris tossed a fireball and burned the goo off.

"YOOOOOOWWW!" They frantically brushed the flames off their lips.

"Aaaaahhhh! My lips!" Carol whined. "Do you know how much gloss it'll take to repair this damage?? My place as Little Miss Earth is RUINED!"

"You're rich, buy a new pair. But first, buy us a way to get that marshmallow."

"Uuuugh." Carol tied a dollar bundle to Chris's fishing rod and held it out to attract the plesiosaur. His eyes becoming dollar signs, the dinosaur floated over to collect his dough, but Carol hopped on his head and dangled the dollars in front to make him float to the other side. Sheila hopped on his back and rode along as they made it to the Branchmallow, and she grabbed the sweet before Carol made the dino turn back. Sheila tossed the Branchmallow onto their ledge, and they melted it using the nearby grill before tossing it onto the branch. But before they left, Carol decided to give the plesiosaur her dollars. It quickly swam off to go on a vacation to Cancun.

They swung the next pit and followed a narrow path through more ruins. Their road became blocked by a huge stone wall, which Sheila couldn't bust down with her fists. She spun both rapidly and slammed the wall with all her force, but no luck. "Sigh… these Mayans knew 'ow ta build stuff."

"You could probably break it down using the Solar Fists." Artie mentioned. "But we need sunlight."

They noticed a ray of sun shining overhead, beaming perfectly between the wall and a totem. "Gimme those, eh?" Sheila took the Solar Fists and Wall Jumped between the structures. She planted her feet against both and raised her fists to catch the sun beam. They brimmed with energy before the sunbeam vanished, so she dropped down and spun her fists again. Fueled with even more power, Sheila threw her double punch and SMASHED down the entire wall.

They were given view of a barren area of land, which rested a gray pyramid-like temple with a steep stairway leading to its entrance. They hurried across and entered this temple, appearing upon a ledge over a dark chasm with a giant tilting table, which they could move around using a control panel and navigate four different-colored gumballs. There were four Tongue Ones at different ends, so they navigated the balls to the Tongue Ones of the right color. Once all were in, they said in a creepy eerie tone, "THAAAAANK YOOOOU."

A bridge opened that allowed the 11 to cross to the parallel ledge. They entered a room with a huge golem that stretched up several floors. They walked down the small staircase and examined the room curiously.

"Y'all stop all that stuff for 'second." (End song.)

The group gasped and looked at the very stop of the statue. Looking down at them was a little African-American baby with a black afro. "It's Rallo." Harry remembered.

"Yo yo, if it ain't little Raccoon Pirates!" Rallo exclaimed, crossing his arms. "Wassup, what's down, answer's me, then is GROUND!"

"Is THAT supposed to be your rap?"

"Man, mah rap's the kicks, yo, and that is no jo', I'm gonna squish you around in case you don't know. BEHO'!" Rallo ripped off his shirt and unveiled a boombox chest, as well as the boombox in his afro. (Play Hoodstomper's Theme from Rayman 3.)

The stereos started blasting large soundwaves that made the giant statue squat up and down with the beat. "Wh…What's happening?" Aurora cried as she and the crew began to dance as well.

"The Boom-Boom Fruit is what I ate, y'all nosey kids just took the bait, combined with my musicbending's make it extreme, now just SIT back and dance to this li'l thing!"

The stone golem began to stomp its feet with the beat, the kids unable to move and feel the heat. Aurora tried to dodge, but came golem's foot, smashin' her to the wall before the others got the boot. "See, none here can resist this beat, not even Stoney can keep from movin' 'is feet. He ain't been animated for oh-so very long, let 'im crush with his power, so big and very strong."

Chris and Sheila tossed flame and Light Spheres, but their dancing prevented them from mustering enough strength, so the golem kicked them away. Kirie was being more nimble while following with the beats, but Rallo still had control and stopped her from evading its kick.

"This be gettin' old, you ain't puttin' up no fight, now get ready to get squished under all this might."

The golem approached the grounded Sheila and Chris and threatened to squish them. But- "Yo, now let a brothuh sing it." (Pause song.)

"WHAT??" Rallo stopped and noticed Harry was back atop the stairs. He wore sunglasses and danced his way down. (Resume.)

Harry: Y'all beats are sick, I mean where's the kick,

I'd much rather Obama than yours' steps I would lick.

Rallo: Yo, stow that tone and pay more respect

To this lovuh who'll squish you with his intellect.

Harry: Intellect that'll make me laugh

You dunno 2+2, that's how good your math

How many numbers, that's my question for you

One two five six ten, that's all you do.

Rallo furiously tried to stomp Sheila and Chris with the golem, but thanks to Harry's rhythm, they could dodge away. He tried to stomp Sheila again, but she flipped away, shot a Light Sphere that bounced up the room, and bonked Rallo in the head.

Rallo: I may be little, but I got big galoots

Women'll see this and be all the hoots

Don'tchu talk smack to me with that so-called game

I'm 'bout to make you feel the shame.

Harry: You say you got game, but I ain't see none

You ain't winnin' any women today, Hon.

Yo' style is cheap, you got no dig

Sheila hop up there and punch that fig'.

Sheila gripped the golem's side and climbed up to the head. She still squatted with the beat as she and Rallo faced, running up to throw punches, but hey, no vase. Rallo still blocked them, he's still in control, now he blasted sonic waves and made her pay the toll. Back to the bottom, off she blows, almost getting squished, but Mason takes and goes.

Harry: Don't you see, didn't count on this

You had a rap planned out for this little bit

But YOU ain't count on 'nothuh musician in crew

This little homie gonna see that you're through.

Rallo: Yo, STOP that biz, this against the rules

Admins look down on this, it puts them in blues.

Harry: Yo, BOP their rules, 'cause this is really cool

They got a problem, well I'll take 'em to school

Mr. Harry in the house, homework is due

Any Eliminators, let me tell ya, buff you!

The Raccoon Pirates swiftly dodged the golem's feet, as Rallo's beats were breaking. Knowing he was faltering, his glands were leaking. "Y'all, I think Rallo knows its well enough. Artie, go on and show 'im the stuff."

"Yo yo dog, I got the goods, now ol' Artie is in the hood." Artie sang, pulling out the metal gloves. "Sheila, wear these and be good to go, some sunlight up there, it's bright 'cha know."

Sheila danced over and slipped the gloves on, then hopped her way up stairs around the room. She took a mighty leap and raised her gloves to the hole where sunlight poured, and her fists felt fueled with power. She fell a little and kicked off the wall, aimed directly at the golem's back. Spinning her fists, she ran up the back, leaped again once at the top, and PUNCHED the back of the head with all she got.

"WAAAAaaaahhh!" The head smashed through the wall and flew across the ruins with Rallo onboard. They smashed the front of a house, where Cleveland was 'bout to feel sore.

"No no no no NO NO!" Crash. "…Oh, hey Rallo."

"Hello, Cleveland. Did Mama divorce you, yet?"

"Nnnnope!"

"Damn."

The golem fell backward and smashed the wall down, and Harry stood where it stood with a victory pose. "ALL RIGHT, Harry!" Aurora exclaimed.

"Them's the moves, Mate!" Sheila cheered.

"Word." Harry said coolly.

"Um… Can I have my glasses back?" Chris asked.

"Response." He handed the sunglasses back. (End song.)

The crew walked up the fallen golem and entered the new passage which he broke down. "Soooo when were you gonna tell us you were a musicbender?" Artie asked.

"I'm not a musicbender, but I know how it works. Music is the only element that can be countered against the bender. I mean, you know rap battles, right?"

The temple began to get darker, and soon pitch-black once they reached the center. Chris and Aurora alit both hands to give everyone sight. "Whoooooaaaa!" What they saw astonished them: it was a large, red pyramid with Mayan symbols and designs around the sides.

"Holy Fritos… it's a bloomin' pyramid!" Sheila beamed. "A pyramid… inside a pyramid! Will adventures ever end??"

Haylee walked around the right with Chris providing her light. "Wait… this isn't a pyramid. It's a spaceship!" Indeed, the rest of the structure lay before them.

Sheila was quick to jump to the top of the cockpit. "Oh my STREWTH! A real live ancient spaceship! How's it fly, ya reckon!" She dropped inside.

The others quickly went in after her to see her touching random things. "Sheila, stop!" Haylee smacked her hand away from a lever. "We don't know what any of these things do. So don't touch anything." With that, she sat on the control panel. "WAH!" She pressed a button that sparked everything to life, and the entrances sealed. The ancient vessel began to tremble as the temple's roof opened, and the ship aimed to the sky. The engines brimmed to life and took off.

"Gulp… Well, there's no turning back now." Chris gulped as they all took a seat.

"I wonder where it's flying…" Haylee spoke.

"Hehehehe!" Sheila could barely remain still in her seat. "We're in a real live spaceship!" And with a huge breath, she screamed to the stars, "THIS IS THE GREATEST ADVENTURE EVERRRR!"

Five hours later… (Play the World Map Theme from Pikmin 3.)

The ship flew for five hours and didn't stop. The crew had fallen asleep at this point, in which Carol was leaning on Mason. They didn't notice as they flew to a vast, red planet, where the vessel took land on its own. The tremor startled them awake, and they approached the windshield to view their destination. "Whoooaaa…" They were taken aback by all the red… and also… white?

"It's…It's Mars!" Haylee beamed. "And check it out, it's…" A plain of giant marshmallows lay before them, "MarsMALLOOOWS!"

"So they were real after all." Harry said.

The crew found some air helmets in a chest and each put one on. They stepped out onto the blood-red landscape and viewed the sea of white, squishy delicacies. "I don't believe it, mates…" Sheila spoke with shock. "Who knew our adventures… would take us to another planet."

"But we go to other planets all the time, Sheila." Aurora reminded.

"Those don't count, mates. Not every bloke has a spaceship that travels a million light-years an hour. This is the work of ancient technology… how folks got around… before we had all our crazy whozits. This is how real adventures should be had. For the first time in my life… I feel complete."

"Soooo you wanna stop adventuring right here?" Harry asked.

"HECK no! We're just getting started! Let's see what this planet HAAAAS!" She leaped forward and far with the low gravity.

"Well, clearly marshmallows!" Aurora laughed.

Act 2: Mars

The pirates freely hopped the red expanse, bouncing off the giant marshmallows for an extra boost. They came to a wide trench with large marshmallows stuck at different parts on either side, lined up so they would have to bounce from the left side, to the right, and repeat until they made it across, which wouldn't be possible without the low gravity. They entered a plain with many tall, thin poles with platforms on top. They rolled a Mega Marshmallow to the shortest platform and used it to bounce up, and from there, gravity-leaped to all the taller, scattered platforms. They made it to another set of platforms that led over a chasm, eventually leading to new ground.

The red plain became pretty straightforward, so they hopped forward and freely. The light weight was such a wonderful and unreal feeling. They've been to space a hundred times, but it's never felt so new. They've never gotten to any planet without using their 4x4-technology, so it felt like a whole new experience. The pretty stars that glittered in the heavens, marshmallows floating in the air, other planets off in the distance. They don't think they've truly noticed how pretty space was until now. Maybe Sheila was right.

The crew made it to a wide, gaping circular pit with several floors. There were marshmallows glowing, and also interesting crystals with marshmallows in them. "…Look!" Haylee exclaimed, indicating a shiny crystal hovering over the middle of the chasm. "It's the Crystal Marshmallow!"

"Euck… I can already feel my teeth cracking." Haruka said.

The kids jumped down each floor until they reached the bottom, ready to take the glowing gem. However, the earth, er, Mars rumbled, and before their eyes, a huge green monster with a single eye shot up from the pit and snatched the crystal in its mouth, latching on the pit ledges with its many tentacles. "RAAAaaahhh!"

"Holy Armstrong! It's an ALIEN!" Sheila exclaimed.

"Yah, and he ATE the Marshmallow!" Haylee informed.

"And I'm guessing he's not getting toothache." Carol noticed.

"Grrrr, I was gonna eat it." Sheila cracked her knuckles. "YOU'LL PAY FOR THAT, GREEN BOYYYYY!" (Play Squizzard's Theme (Normal + Fire Mario Version) from Mario Galaxy 2.)

Boss fight: Lord of the Marsh

Sheila tossed a barrage of Light Spheres at the Martian's giant eye antenna, but its eye sunk in its body and revealed two smaller eye antennas. It used its spare tentacles to grab and throw rocks at the pirates, so they dodged as Mason and Haru tried to burp Gas Bombs at its head. It shielded its eyes from both theirs and Sheila's attacks, and that's when Artie remembered the crystalled marshmallows around the area. "Hey GREEDO, over here!" He clapped his hands above his head to draw its attention. He ran beside the crystals and tricked the Martian into throwing rocks at him, breaking the crystals and releasing Branchmallows.

Angered, the Martian began throwing exploding rocks, making little patches of scorched ground. The group exchanged 'obvious' glances as Sheila and Chris set the Branchmallows over to melt them. They tossed the sticky substances at the Martian's antenna-eyes and stuck them on top. The Lord was forced to emerge its center eye, which still dodged Sheila's punches by shifting left and right. The group dodged its bombs and made it destroy another crystal that released a Mega Marshmallow. Sheila bounced high above the green alien as its eye faced directly upward. The raccoon spun and SMASHED its eye with a Ground Pound, then bounced back to the foothold.

The Martian climbed higher and gripped its tentacles on the second floor's edges. They used the Mega Marshmallow to bounce up there as the Martian shook off the Branchmallows on its eyes. The alien shook furiously and caused red water to rise up from below. A bunch of marshmallows floated up with it, so the group hopped on some and balanced. The Martian Lord opened its mouth and tried to suck them in with the water flow, but Kirie tossed her fan to stick his uvula with its tip. The alien shut its mouth and resisted the urge to barf, smashing his tentacles against the water and flinging them upward.

They noticed the tiki faces in the walls, holding their mouths open, so Sheila punched the floating marshmallows to the mouths and let them chew. The tikis blew large white bubblegums from the marshmallows which the kids could balance on. They made the bubbles drift to the small antenna eyes and pop on them, blinding the creature again. It revealed its large eye again as Sheila bounced on another marshmallow gum and floated higher. She got above the eye again and smashed with a Ground Pound, making it tear.

The Martian climbed higher and caused part of the wall to crumble, revealing a jagged underside which they could climb up. They reached the top of the pit where the Martian grabbed acid-covered rocks from below and tossed them at the pirates. When he grabbed the rocks, Chris and Aurora easily tossed fireballs and made the acid explode.

Artie felt a light sparkle off his helmet and looked behind to see the sun rising in the distance. "Hey guys, look, the sun! Sheila, put on your gloves!"

She slipped the Solar Gloves on and aimed the panels at the sun. It was much farther away than Earth, so they took longer to charge up. "Sheila, watch out!" At Mason's cue, Sheila jumped around to avoid the Martian's rocks. To lure it away, Carol ran around the back and wagged her dollar bundle in the air.

"Finished!" Sheila exclaimed. "Kirie, give me a boost!" The Beatles girl held her hands open to let Sheila hop on them and jump higher. "Mason, you too!" Mason hopped off Kirie as well, grabbed Sheila's tail, and began to spin her around while she held her fists together. Their combined light brimmed even stronger, and from the others' view, it seemed like a mini comet was rushing around them.

Carol smiled as the Martian took her dollars, beginning to count the amount. He wanted to make sure he had enough for contact lenses. But sadly, that day would not come as Mason hurled Sheila above the monster with her fists as bright as the sun. "Double Sun COMET!" She flew down like a meteor and PIERCED the Martian's eye.

"Raaaaahhh!" He puked the Crystal Marshmallow straight out as Sheila hopped back to the ground. The blinded alien cried as it sunk back into its flooded chasm.

"Thus, another leg of my adventure complete." Sheila smirked, leaning against the crystal.

"We know someone's not gonna be around to SEE it!" Artie exclaimed.

"OH, ARTIE." They all face-palmed. (End song.)

The Solar Gloves smoked with overheat, and almost instantly, they fell to pieces. "…Heh… kinda figured that might happen." Artie blushed.

"Eh, they were gettin' sweaty, anyway." Sheila replied. "Let's just get this baby home."

"No! You're not going anywhere!"

The 11 looked around at the sound of a squeaky voice. They looked down and flinched, seeing an army of 2-inch-tall, green-skinned aliens with red uniforms and beady black eyes. "Awwwww!" Haylee beamed. "It's the Martiaaaans!"

"Hehehehe! You're the bloomin' aliens Earth keeps lookin' for?" Sheila grinned, reaching down to touch one. "You're no bigger than a- OW!" It poked her toe with a spear.

"You dirty Earthlings attacked our god. You'll go nowhere with our sacred relic!" The leader squeaked.

"Hey, your god attacked us first." Haylee argued. "We earned that relic."

"NO! You humans are thieves! You've come here on a Martian-made spaceship to steal our treasure! A spaceship you most likely stole."

"We didn't steal it, we found it in the Mayan ruins." Chris told them. "We activated it, and it took us to this planet on its own."

"The Mayans?" exclaimed another. "Could it be the legendary Cosmic Wonder that voyaged to Earth 5,000 years ago?"

"Now that I think about it, it did look kinda ancient."

"Our ancestors interacted with the Mayans ages ago and bestowed onto them their marshmallows. The Mayans honored our ancestors with feasts, but when they heard of our sacred Crystal Marshmallow, the ship's crew was never heard from again. We believed the Mayans tried to decipher the ship's functions, but never could."

"Well, it was sitting in the temple for a reason." Haylee mentioned. "I can't really confirm what happened… but the ship does have a lot of ancient writing on it. I don't suppose any of you…"

"I do, I do!" squeaked a tiny nerd Martian. "I'm an expert at Ancient Martian! I'll translate in a jiffy!"

The crew led them all back to the ship, where the hoppy nerd leaped to the different stair layers along the front and began to read the writing. "'To our friends, descendants, or whoever may find this vessel. The Mayans have tried their best to defend us, but the evil human forces proved too strong. They request us to keep our relic safe from an evil known as the Linlin Family. I fear that these monsters may overpower us before we have a chance to analyze them. However, the Mayans wanted us, and any others of the future to know, they had a terrifying vision, that Doomsday would befall the worlds in Earth Year 2032.'"

"2032?" Sheila spoke. "Why does that year sound awfully familiar?…"

"Because THAT year is THIS year!" Haylee exclaimed.

"Are you kidding?" Dillon asked. "There was already the phony 'Doomsday' in 2012, but THAT never happened."

"But isn't that when Arceus destroyed the world?" Haruka asked.

"Well, YEAH, but our parents fixed it! It's probably nothin'."

The group became so quiet, they could hear a cricket's chirp all the way from Earth. "Hold on! Just who ARE you humans, anyway?" the Martian leader asked.

"We're the Raccoon Pirates." responded Sheila. "And we seek nothing but adventures. And historical priceless relics. But we 'ave NOTHING to do with those bloody Linlin blokes."

"You don't?"

"Yeah. Those bad humans that attacked your ancestors?" Chris began. "They're probably related to Charlotte Linlin, an evil pirate who kidnapped our friend. She's our enemy, too."

"And if we didn't come for this marshmallow, THEY would've come their selves." Haylee followed. "And trust me, I don't think they'd be as merciful."

"But trust us, we're on a journey to defeat them." Aurora assured. "We'll stop them from ever attacking you. But you can only be safe if you let us take the Crystal Marshmallow. If they know we have it, they won't focus on you and go for us. Okay?"

"Trust our sacred relic to a bunch of aliens? I dunno…"

"If your ancestors trusted the Mayans, you can trust us." Chris assured.

"Yeh!" Sheila smirked as she got to her knees and held her fist out to the leader. "Let it be a captain's oath! We'll thrash these drongos and bring yer relic right back! You c'n count on us…"

"…" The leader shrugged and touched his fist to Sheila's giant knuckle. "I suppose… if we could rely on you humans before."

"But to make up for beating your god, go buy yourselves something nice." Carol dropped a dollar bundle, which shook the ground at their tiny sizes.

"Wow! A giant Earthican relic!" They piled around it.

"Imagine all the Pokos we'll make off this!"

"Heh heh heh!" Haylee laughed. "Let's go home, guys." The team climbed inside the ship and activated it for takeoff.

"So how's this crystal work exactly, we just break it and then eat the Marshmallow?" Chris asked.

"Actually, I heard you hold it up to the sun so the crystal magnifies the rays and makes it extra spicy and squishy." Haylee explained.

"But I thought we said we'd give it back." Mason said.

"Yeh, but didn't 'aylee say they just find another candy to take its form?" Sheila asked. "It'll probably appear right back with them!"

"I know, but…" Haylee said doubtfully.

"Well, we'll have to bake it in the cake, eventually." Aurora figured. "We'll be the first Kids Next Door in generations to taste it."

"No we won't, Mate." Sheila reminded. "We're not Kids Next Door right now. We're pirates." She made a smirk. "And that's why… the Kids Next Door ain't gettin' a lick."