I failed but i retrieve. .

It was saturday and it was a fiesta celebration in our place in Vito Minglanilla. When i was not yet a Christian i was very happy in times like these because during the occasion i am going to get drunk and sing karaoke with my family and friends. To only party and having fun all night long. That was the life i had before but now that I am in Christ i can't believe i was like that before from my past and how unclean i was. In that morning everything was very fine because i was just singing Christian songs and playing an audio bible in our speakers. I was on fire for God on that day but when the night came Jayson and i made a big mistake. 😔 I really don't know why i have done that thing. We started singing karaoke and i was just looking at my brother and thought that he might like to have a drink. I was pity for my brother because i saw in his eyes that he really wanted to drink so i asked him and let him bought a drink. Then we had few drinks together with my brother and her partner inside our house. It was so so wrong because it was me who caused them to do that sin and the worst part was i also get drunk with them. I was really lost! Jayson was tempted too because he went outside with his friends and cousins. At first he resisted them but later at night he gave in to drink and smoke. Their cousins tended to tempt him too to use drugs but he refused. We felt happy that night just for that moment and forgotten that God is there watching us. Even Jayson's mother caught us up and we were being scolded. My mind flashed back from the times we were like that from our old self so we stopped and got to sleep. The morning came and it was Sunday but we got a little hangover. We were lazy and decided to go to church only for the afternoon service but in that afternoon Jayson changed his mind. He didn't go with me but i still did go to church with my father. Actually my mind says that i should not come because i have sinned but i saw a message appeared in a post, "Go to church because i would still forgive you." For me it was the devil attacking lies in my mind but God was still willing to give me another chance. I went to church with my father and when we arrived my pastor asked me, "Ivie, why aren't you and Jayson present this morning?" I spoke to him and told him the whole truth about what we have done that night. He said it was very wrong because i was tempted too but my pastor encouraged me to still continue as well as my partner Jayson. After my pastor's sermon i was crying so much talking to God and repented of my sins eventhough i already repented over and over. When i went home Jayson asked me, "What did you tell pastor Ian about us?" I replied, "I told him the whole truth and he wants us to continue." That night i saw Jayson crying too because of what we've done. I can see him repenting so much kneeling down his knees. He was so disappointed for our mistakes but still i encouraged him to repent and continue.

Monday has no church activities and we were only at home. Jayson didn't want to go outside because he can't face everyone who had seen him getting drunk that night. In tuesday we had a bible study and i convinced Jayson again to still pursue and get more closer to God. I told him that we need to continue and have a humble heart to accept the consequences for our mistakes. We went for that bible study and i know that my pastor was still upset with us. His sermon was mainly pointing for us too. To let us know more than enough that what we did was very wrong. That maybe Jesus could come back that moment when we were drinking and we might be left behind just for that one and only reason. That the labour we had started could be in vain! But still God's grace so deep that we're still alive and had a time to repent and show God how truly sorry we are. It was very hard and painful to get back to God because most of the sermons were always convicting from our hearts. I felt the pain inside me especially when my pastor told us that we could not have a testimony during outreaches for one month. It was okay but for me it takes too long. I know we were very wrong because it is not only ourselves who were ruined but the people around us, our church and our testimonies. The important is that i already repented about it so much and only God knows my heart. Jayson and i still go with them during outreaches but we're only giving paper tracks to people. A month is too long to wait but still i won't give up! I have the patience and a heart that is willing to accept my mistakes and consequences. I learned a great lesson for this season. We were only human and we will never be perfect. In my thoughts i can't say i am the only one who commited wrong decisions because there might be other people too who made greater mistakes than mine. Actually i was glad that this happened to me because i learned a lot from it specially about God's deep grace and mercy. How do we truly desire to hold on to Him and pursue heartily until we retrieve. We would never grow if we haven't experienced failures and hardships in ourlives as a Christian. ❤️➕️❤️