In one second, Rafał was flooded with all the black emotions and thoughts that were connected with Tomek. He remembered his inappropriate jokes about impotence, the rumors he spread among their friends and the laughter that cut like a scalpel in unskilled hands - blindly and deeply.
Since they had left school, Rafał had had no relationship with Tomek. It had been seven years or so, during which Brylski had done everything to forget the cruelty of his "friend" and to be able to trust people again. He had worked on himself every day until he had finally managed to trust Damian and actually start living a normal life for the first time, so why was Tomek now standing before his eyes again?
Rafał smiled awkwardly. The sight of his former friend was so surprising to him that he didn't know how to react. Should he pretend to enjoy the meeting, as if nothing bad had ever happened between them, or should he ignore him, pretend not to know him and get the problem over with? Before he could make a decision, however, his mouth opened on its own.
“Tomek? What are you doing here? I don't suppose...?”
‘You were looking for me on purpose, weren’t you?’ wanted to add Rafał, but he couldn't make it out. Tomek, after all, had no reason to look for him. Nevertheless, he was here, now, and made it seem as if this meeting was no accident.
“Actually, I wanted to see you. To talk” said his former colleague. “You see, someone contacted me, someone asking about your past.”
The blood drained from Rafał's face. Could it be that some overzealous journalist from a gossip magazine had already targeted him and was gathering dirty information on him? Why? Rafał wasn't famous yet and might never be. Why does anyone bother to look for dirt on someone as insignificant as Rafał Brylski?
But if someone has already started looking, if he has found Tomek, who knows what he will find out?
Then an ugly thought occurred to Brylski. Tomek did not give the impression of someone who had come to Rafał out of concern for his friend.
“You went to all this trouble just to warn me about the hyenas. Thank you" remarked Brylski, but he did not feel gratitude at all, rather anxiety that the one who was warning him belonged to the scavenger species.
“You know, that's what friends are for” the smile on Tomek's lips became even more false.
At this Rafał swallowed his saliva. Unconsciously he clenched his fist.
“I'm sorry, you've worked so hard and I have to be on a film set. I'm grateful for your warning, but unfortunately I can't even have coffee with you...”
Rafał wanted to turn on his heel and walk away. He didn't want to hear anything more and he didn't want to look at the man whose cruelty had kept him awake at night until now. He wanted to run away from this place and pretend that he hadn't guessed anything, that this encounter hadn't even happened. He was even turning around now, although he had only made a small movement...”
“They pay well," announced Tomek. “It's really funny how valuable information can be.”
Brylski froze motionless. His heart was pounding in his chest. His head began to spin. He closed his eyes to avoid seeing the world around him start to dance.
“My grandfather always said," Tomek continued, "that speech is silver and silence is gold. Funny, I never quite understood what he meant. And you, Rafał, do you understand?”
Rafał definitely didn't want to understand. He didn't want to hear the man he once considered his friend, whom he trusted with one of his biggest secrets, demand money from him for his silence.
The truth, however, was painfully present.
“How much do you want?” Brylski asked, feeling as if the ground was shifting beneath him.
Tomek mentioned an amount. A big amount, beyond Rafał's means.
“Give me time to think” he asked. “It's too much. I didn't get that much after taxes for the whole series. You are a bit... unrealistic.”
“The other side has no problem with that. They give exactly that much.”
Rafał breathed deeply. He put a pleasant smile on his lips and turned to Tomek.
“Who would have thought that the trust I placed in you years ago would cost me so much. Our friendship comes at a really high price.”
“Look, I'm doing you the courtesy of talking about this situation and offering a solution that's good for you. Information is power. I own the information, and if you don't want someone else to own it too, you're going to have to spill the gold. I didn't sign any secrecy clause to have to keep a secret. Is that clear?”
“Like the water.”
“You're the one who decided to be a star. You're the one who wants to be adored by the crowds. You are the one who decides what your future career is worth to you. I'm guessing you're surprised, which is why... You have until tomorrow. Use it well.”
Tomek shot Rafał a finger, just like a character in a cheap American movie, smiled even more falsely and walked away. As soon as he was out of Brylski's sight, Rafał’s knees bent and he leaned against the low wall protecting the stairs. His knees turned out to be weaker than he thought, however, and Rafał sat down heavily on that wall.
Had he just fallen victim to blackmail? Had he just been blackmailed by his former friend?
He was both cold and hot, as if drops of boiling and icy water were dripping on his body. The sun was getting hotter and hotter and the air, heavy with humidity, did not allow him to take a deep breath. Or maybe it was Tomek's visit and the memory of his school days that made Rafał shake like a fever?
What should he do now? What should he do now?
Ordinary people are allowed a lot and nobody cares too much, but if you want to become a public figure, you have to take into account that you will become an object of interest for the masses. Every disability, even the smallest one, will be exposed and exaggerated, making you a national or even international freak. People will point the finger at you, laugh at you, mock you...
Rafał did not plan to become an actor. He wanted to live a quiet and peaceful life and it was only for his film school friends that he agreed to take part in this small serial project. Nobody expected that the project would become so popular that Rafał would catch the bug and really love working on the set. It was as if he had found his life's calling. But if the rumor about him, about his asexuality, spreads around the world, people won't want to look at someone so flawed and ridiculous and Rafał's career will be over before it starts for good. What will happen to The Fifth Capital then?
What to do? What to do? Why does Rafał have to have this sad, this embarrassing secret?
He should contact Damian and inform him of the situation. He should tell him that someone will reveal the secret of his asexuality and the resulting scandal could destroy the production. It's not too late, they can still stop shooting and replace the actor playing Paweł. They will lose a lot of time and money, but at least they will save the project!
Rafał already took out his smartphone and wanted to call Radosz, but his hand hung in the air.