Family {2}

Cole opened the box he kept in his secret room. The one where he wisely and accurately kept the most important objects of his life.

He slid out the box the second letter Claire wrote him when they were together.

He smiled when he noticed the little sun drew on the corner of it. Next to the initials C + C of their names.

He looked up at the ceiling not to cry at the memory of what they had been together.

He then smelled the letter, it still smelled like her. And like the flowers field, they used to walk in every morning.

He took a deep breath and prepared himself emotionally to read it.

If it wasn't for those letters he didn't know where he would be or where he would find the motivation and courage to chase their love when life was continuously getting in his ways.

Those letters reminded him how strong their love was and gave him a hope that maybe there could be still a happy ending for their love story.

'Dear Cole,

I miss you.

I miss you in those 9 minutes and 27 seconds. Now 28. 29 seconds passed by since the moment you walked away from me after kissing the tip of my nose. You said we will see tomorrow because you had to call your father who was having a business to deal with at the company. The business was that he wanted to bring the family back together and hire your brother to help you with the company. You didn't agree with that decision. You said you don't like when family and work combine. That's not a good match. But the answer sounded insincere or at least not completely truthful.

The amazing boy I fell in love with never had a bad word about someone so your answer has taken me aback.

You even said that you wanted to have anything to do with your brother and that you'd rather quit your job just not to work with him and see him every day.

I scolded you for saying that, what kind of brother says such a thing about a relative? Then you mentioned how you two never got along, that your parents always preferred him and sided with him during arguments. You always felt left out. You added that he never got good grades, moreover he was allowed to hang out with his friends all day while if you dared to get a bad grade he would be severely punished.

I asked you why he had all the favoritism and you said because you trained your parents to be a hard worker all your life so they always expected the best from you, and each mistake turned out like a failure. As time passed you grew demanding on yourself as well and you always wanted to be the best in everything leading you to never be happy with your successes and never feel enough.

It was as if you needed to give your parents a reason to be loved whereas your brother was just genuinely liked and loved, hence forgiven for his failures.

I found that weird and unfair until you confessed to me the reason beyond that 'earned love'.

With a broken voice, you confessed to me you were adopted, more than adopted you were raised by your adoptive parents when your real parents left together.

You took a while before continuing your opening up and you told me how sons never fully recover from a parent walking away from them. Left alone if they both do.

You just remember one day waking up and not seeing them anymore but just finding a note with an address.

Suddenly the pieces were put together and made sense. Your heart shuttered in pieces and crumbled to the floor.

What did you do wrong to be left by not one but even both your parents?

And when you said that I felt so bad for you.

Now I understood why you had to chase them and earn their love because they were never your real parents. And maybe you were scared that if you failed they would walk away from you as your real parents did. Is that why you always wanted everything to be perfect between us?

Is that why you never expected me to come back to you? Whenever you see me in the morning you always get surprised as if a big part of you thought I would have walked away from you like it would be easy.

I have to tell you something Cole.

I am writing you this second letter because I want to remind you that you don't have to be perfect with me, you don't have to climb mountains or give me the most precious jewel in the industry just to earn my love. Because I already love you and I already did when I first saw you and you introduced me to me. Let me tell you one more thing, if you live for someone else, you are not living at all. If you do things to be accepted by someone else you end up killing yourself day by day and wasting your life. Even if they raised you, it doesn't mean you owe them something. Nobody is worth it.

You also said how your brother never liked you and that whenever you two fought he always reminded you that you weren't part of the family.

Is that the reason why when I asked you about your family, you answered that you didn't have any?

I would slap your brother if I saw him right now.

Doesn't he know that family isn't composed of only people who raise you?

I never told you this before but I want to be your family from now on, we may not be blood-related but you are more family than any other relative I have.

I am sure they wouldn't even call if I had some health problem.

So fuck family, who said that people shall be forgiven and loved just because they share your same DNA?

You're my real family and my soulmate. I don't need the same last name to seal our bond.

Next time someone asks about your family, tell them about me and I promise you that we will create one in the future. You will finally have the family with me that you never had.

Now back to the serious things, I talked to my old friend Sonia today and she told me I am so into you and sickly sweet that she couldn't hear me talking about you for more than a minute. I am sure she was just exaggerating.

Wasn't she?

Well, my letter started by counting the minutes since you left...

By the way, it had been 14 minutes and a half now.

God, she may be a bit right.

Did you poison me in my sleep?

Well in case you did, keep doing that because I just love my life since when you're in it. I have even loved myself a bit more since I met you. Before my world was black and white, then I met you, and as days passed by you colored my life.

This may sound a bit sickly sweet, but I don't care.

Honestly speaking, I could sing you love songs on rainy days if I had a good voice and a sense of rhythm. It may sound pathetic to people who never experienced such a bit of big luck but I don't care what they think.

Because I know our love will be forever and we will read those letters to our kids in the future. Keep those letters, Cole. For the family, we will have.

I love you.

For no particular reason and at the same time for a thousand reasons.

I just do.

Your lovely sickly sweet, Claire.'

He folded the letter and put it back in the box, a huge smile curved his lips and a whisper escaped.

"I still believe in that family Claire. I hope you do too." The sadness turned his stomach but a glimpse of faith sparkled in his eyes. He won't give up.