Emergency Food.
In the Clock Tower/Mage Association.
"We have located the place where this anomaly took place from."
"Finally, after 10 years of waiting."
"Fuyuki City... the place where the Holy Grail War takes place every 60 years, and most of this anomaly started during the 4th Holy Grail War... Coincidence, I think not."
"Send someone to investigate, we need to get to the bottom of this as fast as possible."
----
"Honjo Jouichirou, 17 years old. Height: 183 cm. No parents, is Japanese, and has been living on his own since 7 years of age. He works as a Mangaka and doesn't go to school as he has been thrown out of 7 and has been rejected by every other since." an officer said reading out the files on Jouichirou.
"What him again. That's like the 3rd time this month." complained another officer. "So what is it this time, he killed somebody or what?"
"He got into a fight with a group of 30 delinquents. Most of them had spiked knuckles and knives, 3 had katanas and even went to dojos and 1 even had a revolver."
"And how many bones broken in total."
"128, with a minimum of 5 bones, and a maximum of 13. 6 even had their balls crushed and found gagging on their penises." the officer said sweating.
"Let me guess, those 6 were rapists, weren't they?"
"Yes, after checking their phones and some interrogations they were found out to be rapists."
"Release him. The court has already sent us a letter saying that he is free since it was self-defense."
"But he hasn't even been to court yet."
"He doesn't need to, he has been there so many times that even the court got fed up and they let him off the hook every time, all we need to do is give them a call and wala~"
"The parents of the delinquents are protesting, demanding Honjo to be punished strictly."
"Don't worry about those people, they must be, no, they are new to the city, they will eventually learn, plus everyone has a busy life, the protest will go on for about 1 day or so, and then they will just give up like a wrestler being choked in the arena."
----
The next day.
----
"Hey...Hey, Shirou wake up. Wake up otherwise I will sit on your face little hero of pipes."
Shirou woke up to the sight of a butt coming close to his face. He immediately put up his hands to stop it.
"Finally, awake, little hero of pipes."
"Can you not do that and get off already."
"How about...no, you make a pretty good chair not gonna lie."
Shirou had enough and just threw away Jouichirou, who smoothly landed with grace.
"What's the big idea, trying to sit on me like that?" Shirou asked with an angry face.
"Say the guy who fell asleep saving pipes."
"That is completely unrelated, and on that note, I fell asleep being productive, unlike a certain someone."
"...Anyways sober up, it's Wartime, and today I'm gonna beat that ass of yours."
----
The judges of this fight were Sakura and Taiga. They looked at Jouichirou and Shirou who were facing each other with knives in their hands.
"Ready... 3...2...1... Start!!!" Taiga announced with her loud and cheerful voice.
They both immediately grabbed their respective dishes and started their War, their Food War.
Later...
Two dishes were presented in front of Sakura and Taiga.
One was a Chinese porridge named Congee. This was Jouichirou's dish.
The other was a toast with a sunny side egg and cabbage leaves as decoration. This was Shirou's dish.
Both the judges tasted each of the dishes and started discussing something. The tension between the two chefs was at its maximum.
"The winner of this Food war is....,
"SHIROU EMIYA."
"Nooooooooooo" "Yessssssssssss"
"That is the 998th win, just two more till a thousand~" Shirou rejoiced as noted down his victory, while Jouichirou noted down his loss with a solemn look.
"It's okay Jouichirou-senpai, you might win next time." Sakura tried to cheer up Jouichirou
"Sakura note that you said 'might' you are not even sure of my victory." Sakura had a guilty smile hearing his response.
"All is well, All is well, All... is...well," Jouichirou said calming himself down.
After a bit of fun and teasing Shirou, Sakura, and Taiga made their way to school.
"Haa, 10 years huh!" Jouichirou exclaimed.
"Lot has happened, the first being the Author's apology for him 'accidentally' not an adding plot armor while creating this story. That f**ker, I swear I'm gonna choke him to death if I ever meet him."
"And for some f**king reason he says that he can't add plot amor anymore. Like the bulls#it."
"Anyways, he gave me some gifts as an apology and I will say it they are not worth losing your plot armor for."
"The gifts were a permanent stand gacha ticket, a summoning card and Ea the sword that I stole from Gilgamesh while being possessed by Dio."
"The gacha ticket gave me the numbers Stand, not the greatest but considering my gacha luck not the worst."
"The summoning card couldn't be used until today for some reason."
"And Ea which the best thing I have got till now, normally only Gilgamesh could use Ea but Author did some stuff and now it's mine but problem is I can't use it not now or any time soon at least."
"And also the Author somehow convinced Alaya and Gaia to not whoop my ass, so they will ignore me unless I do something to endanger the entire planet or the human race. I am actually thankful to this guy at this point now."
"But you should never trust Authors, especially someone like this Author."
(A/N: You hurt my feelings.)
"The next good thing that happened would be that I got another permanent Stand ability from the 24x roll, said stand being *drum roll* Pearl Jam. Haa, me and my lancer luck."
"Now then let's get to summoning." He took out the summoning card which for some reason looked like a Uno card and activate it.
He then arrived in a place with hundreds of floating card, each of which was a pickable summon he could choose.
The summons were nothing crazy their power levels were not that high. Some starter pokemons, weapons like a Nichirin Katana, and the like.
But one particular card plastered a sinister Subarashi smile on his face . He immediately picked the card as he found himself back where he was before using the summoning card and then a voice came from behind him as his smile grew even bigger.
"Paimon is dizzy."
----
Hello fellas Author here. Hope you're enjoying the Fanfic. And do tell me what you think about the addition of Paimon.
Give me thou power stones.