chapter 4

It has been some time since then, i'm now 18, almost done with school. Its that dumb time of year when everyone got all giddy, prom. I wasn't going to go, i had only one friend and he has been out of school for years. I was seeing this guy, well not really seeing him. I wanted a relationship but he didn't want one and instead of not bothering with him at all, we had sex, all the time. If i wasn't at school, sleeping, or at Sean's we were having sex. Sean knew i was doing this and he could tell how bad it was affecting me even though i said it didn't. It kills me when someone brings it up, and the way Sean looks at me when its said. He would look at me with such disappointment, it hurt me so bad. But dumb me thinks that if i keep having sex with this guy that he will eventually want a relationship with me, but he didn't. It hurt so much more since i started to develop feeling for Sean around when i was 13, and it just kept getting stronger. I hated it so much since i couldn't do anything about it. Sean has a girlfriend, she may live far away but he really cares about her and oh my god is she pretty. Even if he didn't have a girlfriend there is no way he would want to date me, hes just too perfect, he probably thinks its weird since hes like 6 years older then me. I dont care how much older he is then me, he's just so perfect.

"what ya thinking about? your real quiet over there" Sean said making me jump. We were at his house watching a movie in his room since his room mates were home and they never stopped talking about mean shit to me.

"i'm just watching the movie ya freak" i said playfully punching him in the arm. He pretended like it hurt and rubbed his arm with a fake frown that made me giggle. His frown slowly turned into an evil smile.

"oh is that so" he said slowly crawling on top of the bed we were sitting on over to me. I felt a little of a blush come on my face and a big smile as i started to back away knowing what he was going to do.

"no Sean get away from me, i'm not responsible for your injuries" i covered my sides with my hands.

"THAT WONT HELP YOU" he yelled as he lunged at me and started to tickle me. I was rolling around and laughing so hard my eyes started to water.

"I HATE YOU" i yelled though my laughing fit as i tried to get away from him.

"YOU LOVE ME, SAY IT" he yelled with a big smile on his face enjoying what he was doing to me.

"NEVER" i continued to laugh. Then i rolled over on my belly and got out of his hands. I was about to get up and run away from him, but then he sat on my butt.

"NO YOU DON'T" he continued to tickle me and i had no way of getting away, i couldn't even move now just lay there on my belly and laugh. Then he leaned down by my ear.

"say it or i wont stop" he whispered into my ear, his hot breath hitting my ear combined with the stubble on his face rubbing agents my neck turned me on.

"I LOVE YOU SEAN" i yelled out so he would stop, but since what he just did turned me on and he didn't know it did. My yell came out as more of a moan. He then stopped and got off of me and turned me over. "i said it, dont tickle me again" i said as i was trying to calm my laughing, and when i did i just continued to watch the movie.

"so who are you going to prom with then" he asked me.

"no one, i'm not going, not point if i dont have any friends there and i dont want to go by myself" i said blankly. I hated the idea of prom, everyone was all talking about it and everyone seemed to have a date but me.

"you should go you'll be mad at yourself latter for not going" he said looking at me with that fucking adorable face i love so much. STOP IT SEAN.

"i wont have fun if i'm there all by myself" i said feeling upset.

"why dont Eric take you" he said sounding angry "after all you must care about him since you always are having sex with him" he said it so coldly i wanted to cry.

"i thought i did, but he wants to date everyone other then me. im done trying to change his mind" then he cupped my face with one of his hands and made me look at him.

"y/n, were you trying to get him to care about you by having sex with him" my eyes trailed down.

"....... yes" his face then changed to sadness. Oh god not that face, please not that face. Every time he makes that face i just want to hold him and kiss him and make it go away.

"y/n look at me, you should only do that with someone who loves you before sex, some one who is always there for you, sex dont equal love, love equals love" he sad with a soft and genital voice. Some one like you is who i want to be with like that. I want to be with YOU like that Sean.

"i'm not bothering with him ever again, and that dont change the fact that i will be all alone at prom which is why i'm not going" he pulled his hand away and i crossed my arms.

"yes you are, i'm going to be your date" he said and i was shocked. I could feel my face get red.

"and why would you do that?" i said looking way

"you need this experience, and with me there, it will defiantly be fun." i laughed and so did he.

"ok, i'll go if your with me"

********** time skip***********

"Y/N SEAN IS HERE TO TAKE YOU TO PROM" i could hear my mom yell.

"I'M COMING"i yelled back to her as i walked out of my room and my dress (picture above) flew with my terns. I was walking down the steps and Sean saw me. The look on his face was 'wow' as he watched me walk down and i smiled with a blush from the look he gave me. Oh god he looked fucking sexy with his suet and red tie on, Damn i want his meat stick. Y/N STOP THINKING THAT. He dont like me that way he is just being the sweet, awesome, best friend there ever is. I got down where Sean was standing and we hugged.

"you look beautiful y/n" he whispered in my ear as my mom took a few pictures. When she was done we went to prom. We got there, ate food, then i watched as people started to dance. A slow song came on and Sean grabbed my hand and took me to the dance floor.

"Sean i never slow danced before, i dont want to fuck it up" i said panicking a little.

"you'll be fine, put your hands here" he said as he put my hands around his neck and put his around my wast " and just move like i am" and we started to sway back and forth. I looked down making sure not to step on his feet and he put his finger under my chin bringing my face up to look at him. "stop looking away from me all the time, i want to look at you e/c eyes" and i started to look at his eyes and smile enjoying myself.

"why is y/n dancing with him?" i heard someone wispier and i started to frown.

"he is way to hot for her" i heard someone else wispier and i looked down to the side of the floor. Then a girl taped Sean.

"hey handsome, would you like to dance with the most beautiful girl here?" i froze and i looked at here with rage in my eyes. Sean kept looking at me with that adorable smile, and it got bigger and i got worried.

"i already am" he said and pulled my head in the crook of his neck and continued to sway me back and forth. The girl scoffed and left, Sean started to brush my heir, i think he knew i was upset. We stayed like that till the nigh ended. He took me home, we hugged and before i could tern to enter the house he kissed me on the check. His lips were so soft, oh i'd let you kiss me anywhere you want to. STOP IT Y/N.

"i better be seeing you this weekend" he said as he waved goodbye and went home. Why dose he do that? Why do you make me love you so much?