Death and rebirth of feelings

The cafeteria near the funeral home was closed so Gin drove the car to Mc Donald's and parked somewhere since it's 3 a.m. in the morning and the visitors, including Alexa's family and friends left already. They just stayed for some papers to sign and worked on them together so Alex will be able to buy her ticket for Paris for Saturday. I'll go and get us some coffee and you will sit here and relax, okay! Gin added leading her to her seat and ran towards the counter for their order. Though Alex didn't say what she wanted to drink Gin knew she likes hot chocolate. So he ordered one choco for her with a burger and black coffee with fries for him alongside cream and sugar.

He went back to his seat looking at Alex who is in front of her in the table. What are you thinking about now? Gin asked, while Alex is resting her head on her folded arms with eyes closed, trying to relax now that all is over but not her sorrow loosing Edmund after Jodie. Well! It's about how I still think of Jodie and Edmund at the same time. And how I am weighing my feelings whether I loved Jodie or Edmund or that I loved Edmund because I longed for Jodie in him or vice versa. I am confused now and I don't want to think anymore.

So what did you order this time? Alex asked remembering their friendly date last time at the Ritz restaurant. Ah! Hot chocolate and a burger. Hmm! Okay, thanks! And that's her name, my past love, Jodie, was her name. Alex added as if drunk from sleeplessness. Oh hmm! Jodie huh! What a lovely name. Gin replied smiling and his heart pounding from excitement, thinking, "she still loves me". How was she, I mean, this Jodie as a partner? Gin asked innocently.

Well! As if Alex is reminiscing her memories about Jodie back in the old days when she and her were very close, especially the time they spent in Boracay. Pretty nostalgic that she smiles every time she remembers Jodie and her fun, romantic, sexy partner, now.

Ah! Where to start? Alex then explained and told Gin everything about Jodie that they spent 2 hours talking at the food chain. She is my first and last love, Alex added. But Edmund came so, I forgot about the pain of losing my best friend and soul mate. He was nice and did everything for me, to show that he truly loved me. But I felt guilty for I still longed for Jodie, her love, touch, and the romance. And I feel guilty because I think I loved Jodie more than Edmund.

Though I can no longer change what happened to Edmund, I still love Jodie with all my heart, Alex said sobbing. Gin felt relieved that Alex loves her still, and in order to comfort her, he stood and sat closer to Alex and hugged her. Alex, like a kid buried her face on Gin's chest while Gin wrapped his arms around her so tight as if he doesn't want to let her go. Alright, there you go! Pour it all out my dear! Alex you don't know how much I missed you! Gin added and got caught up in the moment, that he didn't realize what he said to Alex.

Hmm? What did you say? Alexa added still enveloped in his arms, when she thought she heard Gin murmured something. Though Alex didn't hear much of what he said after, she was so relieved and comforted, she felt safe and happy in Gin's arms. Memories of Jodie came flooding in Alex's mind. She felt Gin touch her right cheek, so she opened her eyes to look at him, then he held her chin towards him and kissed her gently on the lips.

Which Alexa accepted and closed her eyes to feel Gin's warm lips touching hers. Here Alex felt Jodie, the way Gin held her and kissed her. As if Jodie was reborn but in the likes of Gin, the angelic, beautiful man she bumped into the plane in Paris Roissy Charles de Gaulle (CDG) airport. Then the kiss deepened and Gin no longer can resist missing Alexa so much, he put his tongue in and cupped her face as if he doesn't want to let go. Alexa gave in for as if she was really wanting this to happen all along. Needing Gin's warmth and caress, she suddenly felt his hand moving up to her breast.

Alexa then thought they are still inside the food outlet, so both decided to stop and breathe looking at each other like they are hungry for something and not wanting to stop. Gin held Alexa's hand and went to the car. Gin couldn't resist her that he kissed Alexa again, now, wanting and needing her more than ever. Alexa, how ever, couldn't stop Gin since she too is longing for Edmund, or Jodie, or maybe, she just wanted someone to be with her now, to comfort her, to share her suffering, sadness, and Gin is generous enough to go along with it, the kisses, hugs and touches.

It was a bit dark and since it's almost 5 in the morning, there's only the two of them in the area, good enough that their car is parked at the end side of the outlet. Gin didn't stop kissing Alexa, on the lips, the face, neck and at the same time touching her breasts now that he can feel them with his bear hand.

Alexa, moaning, obviously not wanting him to stop, as if hallucinating, said in a weak protest, "Gi...n, stoop!, we are in a public place...pleasssee....! Gin then realized that they are indeed still in the parking lot of the food chain. Oh...ahhhhh!!! Gin exclaimed breathing and gasping air.

I'm sorry Alex, I'm really sorrrrrry! I....Gin wanting to add that immediately took his hand off her breast, when Alexa put her fingers on his mouth and stopped him. No, I wanted it too, thank you! But I want to go home and sleep. I am so tired, sleepy really!, Alexa added while she dodged her self on Gin's chest. Alex, Alex!!!....Gin trying to know if she is okay. Yet Alexa isn't waking up. He carried Alexa to the car and brought her to her hotel. Gin decided to stay with Alexa, while covering her body with a comforter. Gin sat on the floor looking at Alex, her face while sleeping.

Alex in a bath robe, trying to loosen it up and walking towards him, with a sexy smile. Gin, as if in a panic wanted to get out of the bath. His scars are seen, and being naked with Alex would not be a good idea now. So he hid himself with the bubbles, while Alexa is now joining him inside the tube, her foot going in, both legs folded in front of her at the other end of the tub. She sees Gin shocked and as if could not look at her straight into the eyes.

With an intense look from a hungry teasing woman, Alexa will move slowly in front of Gin, and he will bury himself, his body to hide in the bubbly water of the tub. Ah! Alex, think this isn't a good idea!, Gin said looking away from Alexa. Uh! I....I just want to thank you for everything that you have done for me recently, and..... Gin cut in, "you don't have to, I did it because I wanted to and because....I..., he added strongly but with blank emotions. Oh! I...I thought you wanted me as much as I wanted you!.

Maybe I was wrong...I will leave you then, Alex said hurt and felt ashamed coming in to Gin like that. She felt that she degraded herself and went out of the bathroom in anger. Alex...Alexxxxx! Gin, went out of the tub and looked for a towel or robe and since not able to find anything, ran after Alex confused, sorry, naked and his body dripping with water on the bed room floor.

I tried to apologize to Alex but she locked the master bedroom's door and even if how many times I called on her, she didn't answer. Oh, man! She's surely mad and how can I surprise her with the car now, I added feeling stupid on why I didn't agree on what she wanted. I have waited for a very long time to be with her and now it's all ruined. Stupid scissors, stupid lies, stupid me!!!! I thought to myself, screaming with hate and disappointment, and sadness, loosing the one opportunity I have with Alex. I need to make it up to her and give her what she want, tonight.

I texted Alexa and asked her to join me for dinner. Since I bought a tuxedo in black and white, this is the perfect occasion to sweep my love off her feet once and for all. I organized a romantic dinner near the pool. Checked on my internet recipes for a not so formal dinner. Cooked pasta, bologna with pesto sauce and lots of cheese, Alexa loves cheese. Red and white wine on the holder with lots of ice. And my note, apologizing for the incident earlier at the tub, which I want to redo again later tonight in the masters bedroom, first off in the jakuzi.