Chapter 6

Nathan's P.O.V

Today is Wednesday and I have a good feeling my mum is going to be discharged. Finally, things are a little back to normal. Yesterday at the hospital with Emily and Zeke, my mum laughed and talked like before. I truly believe that she'll be home today. The doctor said she might have to use a walking stick to walk but I'd just be glad to see her at home and on her feet again. 

"Dude, what's got you smiling so much? We've been standing here for five minutes and you haven't said a word" Zeke asks.

I bring out my books from my locker and close it 

"Sorry about that. I was just thinking about my mum. She has been getting better really quickly "

"That's good news bro. I wish I could come over after school but you know how my mum gets when I miss one of her events"Zeke says and shuts his locker.

"It's almost like she has one every single day" 

"Thankfully it's not every day but it does feel like it"

"Hey" Emily walks towards us sounding chirpy

"You're extra happy. What happened between the walk from your locker to here" I ask her

"I transferred the money to Simon. It just feels good to feel free. Thanks, Zeke" she turns to Zeke and offers him a smile.

He receives it and passes it on

"No, thank you. My mum is dragging me for one of her things, Saturday night" he passes her a card

She collects the card and looks through it

"Pick you up at seven?" He asks 

"Cool. I'd have to ask my dad first" she replies 

"Alright"

I just stare between the two. I have no idea what they're going on about.

"Yo! I have no idea what y'all are talking about and why don't I get a card too"

"Don't worry yourself dude" Zeke closes the topic and I decide to let it slide. But it's hard, I mean. They're planning on hanging out without me. Is something going on?

We walk into our classroom and as I'm about to take my seat, Emma signals to me to meet her outside. I oblige and follow behind her.

"I heard about your mum. How is she?" She asks genuinely worried

"She's a lot better now. She's going to come home soon"

"Okay, that's good to hear. I wish her full recovery"

"Thanks, Emma, that means a lot"

We stand in silence for a few seconds, just gazing into each other's eyes but then the teacher had to come and interrupt us

*******

After school, Zeke gives us a ride to the hospital and leaves to meet his mother at one of her things. 

We walk into the ward my mum is in and my dad is sitting by her side, holding her hand.

They both turn to us as I shut the door.

"Hi Mr. and Mrs. Williams" Emily greets my parents

"How are you?" They ask in sync and she replies saying she's fine.

Just then her phone starts to ring, she walks outside to answer it and comes in a few minutes after.

"Sorry I have to go. My dad needs me. Get well soon Mrs. Williams.  Bye Nathan"

"I'll walk you outside," I say and follow her outside 

"Okay"

Once we're by the hospital gate. I ask

"So what was that earlier today with Zeke and the card?"

"He asked me to go with him somewhere" she replies

"Just the two of you?" I ask. 

"Yes, Nate. Do you have a problem with it?"

"No, of course not. I just don't know why I wasn't invited" it's just weird that the two of them are going out without me 

"Three is a crowd dude," she says with an adorable smile 

"What?"

"You heard me. Bye, see you tomorrow"

I wave her goodbye and go back into the room. My dad's phone starts to ring and he excuses himself to go answer it. 

"Nate" my mum calls.

"Yes mum" I go to sit where my dad just stood up from

"How are you?" 

"Fine and you?"

"I'm okay Nate. Whatever happens to me, happens for the best" she says sounding down

"Mum, why are you talking like this? Nothing is going to happen to you" 

"I know but all I want is for you to live your best life and be happy even if I'm not around"

Hearing her say all these things is really making me worry 

"Mum stop making me scared nothing is going to happen to you"

"Just be a good kid. No matter what."

"Please stop it mum" I yell

She opens her mouth to speak but suddenly starts coughing. I stand up and begin yelling to call the doctors and nurses. A doctor comes in and walks toward her. I have no idea what the doctor is doing. My eyes are focused on my mum's face. My heart starts racing and my palms start sweating profusely.

"I love you Nate" my mom whispers and her eyes close.

"No" I yell and shake her. 

"Mum you can't go" I shout

"You need to calm down," the doctor says and drags me from her body, I peel his hands off me and hold him by his collar. 

"Do something. You're a doctor. You said she was going to come home soon. Do something" I yell and release his collar. I fall to the floor. Tears start flowing from my eyes.

The doctor walks up to her and checks her pulse.

"She is gone" he covers her with the bedsheet.

My dad walks into the room, he pauses at the sight of me on the floor and my mum being covered. 

"Doctor, is this a joke? What's happening? Why is my wife covered up?" He asks, from the way he sounds it's as if he's being hysterical 

"I'm sorry Mr. Williams she's gone. There was nothing wrong with her vitals. There's no explanation to why she gave up the ghost" the doctor explains but my dad doesn't care about his words 

"What are you telling me? My wife is dead. No this can't be" he turns to me

"Nathan can you hear this man telling us that your mother is dead" he slams his hand into the wall

I stand up and hold him down before he caused any serious injury to himself

"Dad, you need to calm down. Mum wouldn't like to see you this way"

"You're right son" he wraps his hands around me and cries. We both cry. Neither of us leaves her side as if we expect her to stand up and say it was a lie that she was alive. The doctor comes to beg us to leave. We get into the car but my dad doesn't drive; he just stares at the steering wheel.

After minutes of staring at the wheel. He starts the engine and drives us home. I wish he'd talk about his feelings but I know he isn't going to. He gets into the house but I sit outside on the front porch. I feel like I'm physically unable to cry anymore.

My mom was my everything. She was there for me through everything. I told her everything. I was a mummy's boy and I wasn't ashamed of it. She taught me how to respect women and how to be a good friend. I can't imagine going on with life without her. I miss her already.

I pick up my phone and text Emily

"My mom didn't make it"

It shows that she is typing but then the text box drops. I sigh and look at the stars. 

I don't blame Emily for not replying. No one ever knows what to say to someone who just lost someone important.

A tear escapes my eyelids and I wipe it off. I stand up to go inside but I hear footsteps. I stop and look towards where they're coming from.

"Nathan" I hear Emily's voice say, she comes closer.

"I'm so sorry for your loss. Nathan. Your mom was an amazing person. Please know that I'm here for you, to listen, comfort, and lean on during this difficult time"

A tear slides down my face and I wrap my hands around her. I bury my head in the croon of her neck

It feels so good to know I have a friend like Emily by my side who is always there for me. I just wish my dad had someone he could pour his feelings to

She pats my back slowly. 

We sit down on the front porch.

"I  can't believe she's gone," I say and sigh 

"Neither can I," Emily whispers.

"This was not how I thought the day was going to go" I start to say

"I thought that she was going to come home now she's gone forever" I wipe the tears that start falling 

"She's not gone forever. A mother is with us always, first in her lifetime, then forever in our memory. Your mum lives on in our hearts through the memories" Emily says. 

I nod at her and rest my head on her lap. I close my eyes. I can see my mom, she smiles at me and I smile at her, and then I fall asleep.

*******

The next day I didn't go to school and spent the whole day staring at my mum's photos. Later in the evening. People start stopping by our house. Consoling my dad and me and telling us it's going to be okay. Frankly, I don't know how it's going to be okay without my mum in my life.

Family members that I haven't seen in years stop by and they start discussing plans for the burial. According to them. It's a family tradition that the dead body doesn't stay up to a week before the burial so she's going to be buried on Saturday. It feels so wrong to hear my mum being referred to as a body or a corpse. It's all so overwhelming so I excuse myself from the family meeting and go to my room. I pick up a pen and start writing my feelings into a notepad. When I'm done I look at the words and they are almost poetic. It looks like a song. 

I hear a knock on my door and I flinch a little.

The door opens slightly and I can see Zeke and Emily, they walk in and give me awkward little smiles.

"Sorry about what happened. I'm here for you. If you need anything" Zeke says and awkwardly hugs me.

"How are you holding up?" Emily asks.

"I've been better"

We all just sit there on the bed in silence for a long time, neither of us knowing what to say. 

"The funeral is on Saturday," I say breaking the silence

"Isn't that a bit early?" Zeke asks

"It is but it's something that my mom's family believes in"

"Okay we'll be there" Zeke confirms

"When are you going to come to school?" Emily asks 

"I don't know. I don't think I can handle that right now" I just want to lay at home and be undisturbed

"Don't worry, take all the time you need. Zeke and I would help you with notes and all your assignments" 

"I never…" Zeke starts to say but is cut off by Emily

"Ezekiel"

"Yes. I would be helping out with all your school workload" he finally says

"Thanks, guys"

"Alright we'll see you later"

"Bye"

As they walk out, Emma comes in. She hugs me and sits down beside me

"Hey. What happened was very tragic. I'm sorry for your loss. I didn't know your mother but if she raised you then she must have been a wonderful woman"

"Thanks"

"I missed you at school today. I can't wait to have you back"

"Really?"

"Yeah. I missed that cute smile of yours. I hope I don't have to wait too long to see it again" she moves closer to me

"You can see it right now" I try to smile but it doesn't feel right, and u end up with a frown and a sad face

"I'm sorry it's just a little hard to smile right now"

She takes my hand in hers. I look at our hands and then at her.

"You don't have to apologize. I can wait. Your smile is worth the wait" 

She looks deep into my eyes and I feel so drawn to her, I feel myself leaning forward and really quickly our lips join and we share a kiss. Our first kiss together.