#44

MEDDIE’S POV

“No, not like that you useless bitch. Ty nichego ne mozhesh’ sdelat’ pravil’no, yebanaya shlyukha!” The following punch from his fist is so powerful that I almost black out right then and there. (You cannot do anything right, you fucking slut!)

“Izvinite, ser.” My voice barely leaves my throat. (I’m sorry sir.)

For the past month, I’ve been forced to train. As soon as the doctor gave me the go, Nikolai put me on a tight schedule.

Every day, I am to wake up at exactly four in the morning. If I am not up and ready by that time, Nikolai has given permission to everyone that they can beat me to their heart’s desire, and can torture me in any way want.

Then I train with the other Russian mafia soldiers. I have to do whatever they are doing. If I fail at any task, I am beaten by everyone present at the training centre at that time. And I fail often, because these stupid fucks only talk in their native tongue, as a result, I’m unable to follow their instructions many a times.

Nikolai is training me to become his secret weapon, a killer, as he once told me. I am to do everything he asks me to.

My day starts with training with the other soldiers, going on to learning the art of seduction, learning many different languages is also a part of my schedule every day, but because he’s forcing me to learn quite a few different languages at once, everything is muddled up inside my brain.

There’s a game he’s fond of playing, every night, he comes to the room I’m allotted, which is as big as a storage cupboard, and talks in a different language. If I can reply to him, he leaves after having his fun with my body. But when I’m not able to respond to him, he first tortures me, then has his fun with my body and leaves after he is satisfied.

I don’t get rest until one or two at night, meaning I only get two to three hours of sleep at the most.

My body has deep blue patches all over, with fresh ones taking place every single day. I am banned from getting medical treatment.

Today just so happens to be another day of beatings for me. The useless fuck who trains the soldiers, is always out to get me. He beats me for every little mistake, and sometimes even when I don’t make a mistake. He has an unknown grudge against me, and he also makes incorrect reports about my progress to Nikolai. And an angry Nikolai is very difficult to calm down.

When this stupid trainer falsely reports to Nikolai, and he has already been annoyed by other things that day, then for me it means that I won’t get to sleep that day. Being as cruel as he is, he ties me in the basement, torturing me beyond comprehension, and after that, I still have to be at the training centre at the exact time.

If I am not present, you guessed it, I’m beaten.

This is the fate I was assigned at birth, then so be it. Getting up from the floor, I sigh. Going towards my opponent once again, I try to win for once. But all I’ve tasted in these sparring sessions up until now, is dirt, punches, and loss.

And once again, I’m on the floor, on my back, in a chokehold, forcing me to tap out.

Great! Tonight I won’t get any sleep. Nikolai has been beyond frustrated today, he came to my room in the morning, just as I was about to leave for the training centre, and beat me to a pulp. Now, when Boris goes to report today’s progress to that monster, I will get locked up in the basement again. Today is just not my day.

Boris snickers. He knows what will happen to me now.

In an attempt to stop Boris from reporting to Nikolai I speak up without a second thought, “Boris, please, don’t tell him. I’ll do anything for you. Please!” I fall down to my knees in front of him, begging him, holding onto his leg.

He jerks away from me, “chto ty sdelayesh’ dlya menya? Skazhi mne shlyukha! Chto ty gotov sdelat’ dlya menya?” His dirty hand pats my head in a perverse manner. But I have lost all sense of dignity. Nikolai has made sure of it. I don’t care what anyone does to my body now. Although, it would have been better if I had given my once prized possession to someone else, even Damiano would’ve been a better choice. (What will you do for me? Tell me whore! What are you willing to do for me?)

“Chto-libo! Vse, chto vy khotite, ser!” I reply to him without any hesitance. (Anything! Whatever you want, sir!)

“Ya ne znal, chto ty tak okhotno obrashchayesh’sya so svoim telom vposledneye vremya, dorogaya.” A familiar voice speaks. The voice of a monster. (I didn’t know you were so willing with your body nowadays, darling.)

Capital shit!! What am I going to do now? Why God? What did I do to you? Why did he have to come here at this moment? He is always busy in the mornings, then why?

“I-i-i-“

“Stop! Stop your stuttering. Did you think you would get away with anything here? Tsk. Tsk. Tsk. Meddie, why do you never learn your lesson?” He teases, coming forward while Boris backs away.

Still on my knees, I now grab Nikolai’s leg, begging him to spare me this once, “I’m sorry. I will never repeat this mistake. I’m sorry! Please just this once, spare me, I beg you!!” I don’t cry. I have stopped crying. Nikolai hates it when I cry, in turn torturing me more, so I stopped. I cry in the lonely room I was allotted, falling asleep every night with tears in my eyes, waking up every morning with dried tears on my face.

“Get up.” I do so. It’s best if I don’t vex him anymore for today.

“I see that you have learned how to follow commands. Good. I’ll spare you today.”

“Thank you, master!”

“Don’t thank me yet. I said I’ll spare you today, but you’ll get what you deserve tomorrow. Now, take this.” He says as he passes me his gun, I take it. “Shoot him.” He orders me.

“What?” My hand trembles.

Nikolai leans his head forward, whispering in my ear, “strelyay v Boris. Ty znayesh’, chto byvayet s predatelyami, moya dorogaya.” He rests his head on my shoulder, gripping my arms and pulling them up, aiming at Boris’ head. “And keep your eyes open.” (Shoot Boris. You know what happens to traitors, my darling.)

Making sure to keep my eyes open, I put my finger on the trigger, pushing it. Boris just stands there, he has nowhere to run. And running will only mean torture. I have become used to the recoil of the gun now. I have become used to a lot of things now. Weapons, beatings, illegal things, my body being used as a sex toy…things like this do not bother me now.

I’m becoming numb to all of this now.

“Good girl. Now, follow me.” I follow behind Nikolai after keeping his gun in the waistband of my pants, head down, arms behind my back, exactly how I was taught.

“If you remain on your best behaviour today, I will forgive you for what you tried to do back there."

"Thank you, master. I will be on my best behaviour today.”

“Good girl, you are learning fast, Meddie. My sister is coming home today. I want you ready and in front of my office in the next fifteen minutes. If you are not there, you know what will happen.”

“Yes master.” I pull his gun out of my waistband, “master, your gun.” I offer it to him.

“Keep it with you for now.” He orders and leaves me standing in the hallway.

I rush towards my room, which is in the basement itself, the room that I woke up in. getting dressed in a black t-shirt and black pants, I tuck the t-shirt in, also tucking the gun in the waistband.

I wonder why he suddenly trusted me with his gun…what is he planning now? Some sort of test perhaps? But why all of a sudden? I have been following his commands without hesitation for the past month.

‘Maybe he’s scared that if you’re given a weapon, you’ll try to kill him.’

I snicker at my subconscious. ‘Yeah, the monster who scares everyone in this mafia and who’s name is enough to scare people away, is scared of me. A tiny girl trying to survive her destiny…You are getting stupider by the day bitch. Shut it!’

Leaving the room, I go towards his office. I am not allowed to enter his office under any circumstance. Any time he asks me to meet him in the office, it means I need to wait for him outside his office, like a bodyguard, actually like a loyal, trained dog, just waiting for the next command form her master.

I stand there for maybe half an hour, when I suddenly hear loud sounds coming from inside. People are shouting, two or three, I’m not sure. Unsure if I should react or not, I contemplate what to do. If I go inside, I’ll be punished for going into his office. If I keep standing here, and he happens to be in danger, I’ll still be punished for not taking any action to protect him. That’s the duty of every soldier who lives in this building. If a situation arises where master’s life is threatened, we are to kill anyone who comes in our way and tries to stop us from protecting master.

His life is the most important, and protecting him is our first priority. If we have to put ourselves in the line of fire, then so be it.

Not knowing what to do I knock on the door, “master?” There’s no response. I knock again, nothing.

Shit!! Going into his office will entail less torture than if he gets hurt in any way. Making up my mind, I twist the door knob, one hand behind my back, on the gun tucked away in my waistband, and I enter Nikolai’s office.

Inside the office, Nikolai sits on his desk, surrounded by three men and a woman, all of them pointing guns at his head.

I pull my gun out too, pointing it at the woman.

“Who is this Nikolai? Your pet?” The woman speaks. How the fuck is she speaking to him by taking his name? No one is allowed to call his name other than his father.

I take a step forward, my eyes trained on her, “put your gun down.” I tell her.

“And what will you do if I don’t?” She mocks. I cock the gun, getting ready to shoot. Internally, I would love nothing more than to watch this monster die, but if I don’t do anything right now, he will make me regret it later.

“Ubey yeye!” She orders, and one of her men comes towards me. I hesitate for a second… (Kill her!)

And it seems that my momentary hesitation was enough for the brute to charge towards me, full force.

There’s no way for me to beat him, he’s too big and too strong for me. So, without missing another beat, I sidestep, making him lose balance for a millisecond, which is enough for me to shoot at him.

Still busy looking at the brute who attacked me, I get shot in the arm, resulting in the gun falling out of my hands.

Another brute comes at me, punching me so hard, I start to see stars circling my head. Shit! Focus Meddie. Clear your head. You need to live, and you need to make sure this monster lives too, so that one day you can kill him yourself.

The brute tries to punch me again, but before he can, I kick him in the nuts, followed by slamming his head on my knee. He remains bent over for a couple of seconds, surprised by the attack on his precious jewels and his bald head. I punch him in the head twice, but it doesn’t do much damage to his thick skull. Taking a chance, I pick up the gun, shooting his arm, legs and stomach. At least he will stay in his place on the ground, giving me enough time to press the emergency button under Nikolai’s desk.

Although, I do not understand why there’s an emergency button here. Nikolai is capable enough to save himself from any threat.

I focus on the scene in front of me. The woman seems to have moved away from where the fight, if we can even call it that, took place. She now stands behind Nikolai’s chair, pointing her gun at his head. Her henchman, beside her, his gun pointed at me.

He shoots at me, the bullet hitting me near the shoulder on the same arm as the previous shot. Controlling myself and trying to remain focussed, I shoot at him as well, aiming at his stomach twice in a row. He bends over and I shoot him in the head.

Now only one bitch remains. I focus completely on her, when I am attacked from the behind. My neck is in a chokehold. Luckily, my arms are free, so I point the gun at our feet and shoot the woman’s goon in his foot. Momentarily shocked, I take the chance, turning around and shooting his heart.

I also shoot the man I had previously shot in the stomach in his head. Now, I can give my complete attention to this bitch.

“Drop your gun, I won’t hesitate to kill you.” I speak firmly.

Nikolai abruptly gets up from his seat, and starts clapping, “I’m impressed Meddie. But I expect better from you.”

I am beyond confused right now, “what?” I ask.

“She’s better than what you told me brother. She knew she’ll be punished for entering your office, yet she still took the chance.” The woman speaks.

Wait, brother? Is she, his sister? So why was she pointing a gun at him? And who were these goons? I look at all the dead bodies around me.

“W-what?” I look at Nikolai for an explanation.

“It was a test. You barely passed.” Nikolai speaks. Test? This fucker tested me? Why is he so paranoid? It’s not like I can kill him. What would he have done if I failed today?