9- how (not) to tell somebody no

the scene was really set up to be one for the records. something you would see at the awards they give to television shows. but this time I didn't get the script for my dialogues. nobody told me I was going to be the protagonist of this love story. I feel like I've been dropped right in the middle of a soap opera I didn't even know it existed.

the way faraday was looking at me almost made me tear up. but that didn't last long as she dropped the bomb. I felt a severe pain in my throat as I tried to say anything at all but couldn't at the same time. my mind was blocked and I couldn't think of anything to say.

-miss Cecile I.... sorry I didn't mean to say that I.... - faraday tried to wipe away her tears and looked away. Wich made her even more emotional and cried more just as she turned away. usually trying to hide tears only leads to even more of them.

- no, wait faraday it's just that -

faraday teleports to the top of the cage. facing away fromm me. even then I can still hear the sobs coming from her, even if they're fainted and far away. the box and the dress are on top of her bed reminding me that she is NOT teleporting but moving really fast... that's.... that's not the point here...

-listen, faraday. we need to talk about it. come on I'm not mad or anything.

-just give me a second and I'll be ready.... please.

-alright... I'll be waiting outside. tap the window when you're ready.

crossing the corners of the door feels like I'm walking through a dense and heavy smoke. the atmosphere feels heavy and suffocating. I..... I don't know.....

I don't have feelings for her. at all, not as far as I know. even stretching the definition of "liking" someone I still see Faraday just as a coworker and nothing else. but... goddamm I don't know how to handle this. this is the first time somebody has told me that they like me. I think I should feel flustered but I just feel like I'm in deep trouble right now. I don't want to tell her no. that would break her heart and I don't want.... nor need to see her sad, having a broken heart would just make things worse for both of us and my work. I.... Don't know what to do...

*tap* *tap*

-miss Cecile. you can come in now

right, here goes nothing

the moment I enter farday gets back to her bed, now sitting on the side of it. looking directly to the floor and not saying a word. she is trying to play with what she can grab of her pants in her thighs as if desperately trying to find something else to do while I need to say what I need to say.

-listen faraday I... don't... feel that way about you. you and I are barely friends. and that is all. nothing else. we just work together.... mostly. I-

-i know.....I get it

said Faraday looking all gloomy, her hair barely had any color anymore and the brightness was barely noticeable at all. her eyes were red and watery. she didn't sound annoyed by my answer just... disappointed and sad.

-listen, although I don't feel like that towards you it doesn't mean we can't be.... you know.... friends. I like the way you are and the way we work together so we can continue to do so just as we did before. I.... we need to continue working as usual.

- I- I know... I know - her voice cracked a little bit and tears began to flow in her face

- Im really sorry faraday. do you need a moment?

-please

- ok I'll... be outside ok. if you want anything please tap on the glass again

-miss Cecile.... can you please turn off the lights?

-yeah , sure thing.

I walk outside the room as she asked me, turn off the lights inside her cell. a moment of silence turns into an eternity and I just can't stand the fact that I can't see a thing going on inside. something you should expect when you have a dark room. something I don't want to see when that dark room has inside a little girl that can illuminate a facility just by her existence alone. her hair has no brightness nor color and that makes me feel even worse no Matter what angle I take on this situation. I fucked up. but no matter what, this would have been fucked anyway. there was no good ending in all of this. I feel bad about saying no but there was no other option.

but....

there is no time for reflection, I have several days of work on my shoulders and I need to clear them up and since I can't work with my partner at the moment I guess I should start with whatever Alan wrote in my papers.

my investigation was just about to start so I didn't have much written on it.

[subject F- Faraday

as of the writing of this note the capabilities and limits of faraday are a mystery for myself, the government, and faraday herself. due to the lack of any element or alloy heat resistant enough to withstand her power there is little to no room to experimentation. due to this I will resort to just guessing according to what faraday describes herself as the "limit". for this, I need to experiment with how much power she can send Through her lightning as well as how long she can stay in that state.

in recent events I noticed that the lightning she uses for her movement comes from inside her body and then hits her flesh again. all of this happening without having a noticeable protection for herself.

in past incidents with awakened souls I have observed that users of elements or corrosive materials are always born with a resistance to the element they are born with, both externally and internally, but for some reason faraday is the first person to be born without a protection to her element, even weirder considering there are past records of other lightning users, so this isn't due to her element. despite this faraday doesn't seem to receive permanent damage to her skin or organs when she moves. in fact she doesn't have any of those injuries by the time she stops her movement, leaving me to believe that she has not only a healing factor but one of the strongest ones in history. knowing for how long she can do it as well as the maximum speed she can accomplish is in the list of things to research, however since the priority is to find a material to retain her, speed is not a matter of concern regarding her containment, due to this, I will relegate this matter to a secondary degree.

on a even more secondary note I need to find out if she feels pain in any degree as the injuries she sustains are pretty massive, yet doesn't show any kind of response to those injuries. if she doesn't feel any pain that could affect the amount of time she can stay at her prime.

* this is where Alan starts to write*

Test for lightning power: faraday told me that when she melted that rod that day she was using as much as she could, but recently said that she tried again to do that much and couldn't do it. I think it

had to do with us putting pressure in her at that moment, and by us I mean lady Gustave.

she hasn't really trained or anything so I would assume that under very, VERY stressful situations she would barely reach that power she used when she was a child. I would start with making something as resistant as that rod since in best case scenario there wouldn't be any stress in her life

*oh no*

as fast as how long it really depends on "the day" sometimes it's longer than others. but mostly depends on her will to continue using her powers. most of the time she stops when she starts felling tired after about huh.... 5 seconds? I don't know how this works but I think it's called time dilation. faraday told me that she was bouncing around the room for about 30 minutes but I only saw flashes for a couple of seconds, I don't see why she would be lying so I think time dilation is our best option. well in that case "30 minutes" is her top, she says she just doesn't want to go further than that but she "could" do it. then again, I don't see Faraday wanting to escape that much so I don't think we need to go further than that.

that is as far as we tested. I'll leave everything else to you. ]

what he said really makes me think about something. why do we need to contain her in the first place? she doesn't want to leave or anything. nor does she feel uncomfortable being here. Alan himself told me that she is not dangerous, at least not in the sense of her wanting to be dangerous. she is really kind and sweet. it's not like she wants to dominate the world or something. she just wants to wake up the next day eating some pancakes. the only reasons she gets so powerful is because she gets mad or feels stressful. having the need for a defense in case of that in the first place means they don't really want to contain her just as it is. they're probably planning on doing something to piss her off once they have the material.

do I really want to let them hurt a kid like this?

no. but I don't have another option. it's either her or me, at the end of the day whatever happens to her will make the world... no... the universe a safer place, this is for the good of everyone.