After Confucius' first setback

After his mother's death, Confucius remembered her teachings and studied hard so that he could wait for an opportunity to display his talents and honour his ancestors and contribute to his country.

But at the same time, Confucius was all alone and unsupported. He had to study in silence to build up his knowledge and abilities, and waited for the opportunity to meet more friends who shared his ambitions.

Confucius was still a young man, cautious but with little experience in dealing with people. He simply thought that he should make a name for himself when he had the chance, and he also felt that he already had some skills.

Once, when the powerful and prominent Ji family of Lu hosted a banquet for the world's most famous scholars, Confucius thought to himself, "There must be a teacher for all three." If the world's most famous scholars were gathered together, he would surely find like-minded friends and learn more useful knowledge by talking to them. Unexpectedly, at the gate of the Ji family, Confucius was blocked by a Ji courtier, Yang Hu, who looked down on Confucius, whose family had fallen on hard times and whose parents had died, and so blocked him out. Yang Hu said with slight contempt, "Boy, the Ji family hosted a banquet for the famous scholars, and did not invite you." With cold words, Yang Hu refused to let Confucius in for the party.

Not to be outdone, Confucius said to Yang Hu, "Please put yourself in your place, how would you feel if I blocked you out and did not let you in? Remember: Do not do to others what you do not want done to you. What you do not want to do yourself, do not inflict on others." Confucius finished and courteously left.

This was the first time in his life that Confucius had encountered a wall. Confucius realised that the society at this time was morally corrupt and that people had a deep-rooted sense of gentry, and that in the face of the "collapse of rites and music", it was not enough to rely on one's own "fire and loyalty". The gap between the ideal and the reality could not be changed in a day, and what awaited him was a more difficult road to spread morality and manners. In the meantime Confucius thought: "A scholar cannot help but to be a man of great perseverance; the task is heavy and the road is long. Is it not also important for a man to be benevolent? Is it not also far to die?" (Meaning: A truly responsible person must have a tenacious will because he carries a great responsibility and a long road to achieve it. It is a great responsibility because one takes benevolence as one's responsibility. (Because the end of life is taken as the end of the task, the road to the realisation of ren is long and distant.)

In the face of Yang Hu's insolence, Confucius thought: "If three people walk, there must be a teacher for me. Choose those who are good and follow them, and those who are not good and correct them. It means: Several people are walking together, and one of them must be able to be my teacher. (One should choose their good points to learn from, and take care to correct their bad points.)" Confucius told himself never to belittle or insult people of low status as Yang Hu did! It is high morals and manners that are worthy of Confucius' attention.

It was because of this thought that Confucius did not get angry, but left there courteously.

This time, the cold treatment brought to Confucius because of the idea of gentry did not extinguish his belief in being active and pursuing his ideals, but instead strengthened his determination to work hard and be self-reliant in his studies. Through his words and deeds, Confucius hoped to spread the positive energy of mutual respect and love and to popularise the idea of equality and freedom for all.

From then on, Confucius worked even harder to learn about various cultures, and slowly, Confucius gained a certain amount of local fame because of his erudition and versatility. In addition, Confucius enjoyed playing ritual and ceremonial games as a child and studied very hard. Thus, at the age of seventeen, Confucius was already known for his knowledge of rituals.

When Meng Lizi, a noble ruler of the state of Lu, became critically ill, he said to his son, Meng Yizi, "Manners are fundamental to being a man, and without them it is difficult to establish oneself in the world. I have heard of a very remarkable man named Kong Qiu (also known as Confucius), who was a descendant of the sage, but whose family declined in the state of Song. His ancestor had given up his position as king of the state to someone else and made his own descendants the supreme ministers of the kingdom of Song, and the people became more respectful. I have heard that even if the descendants of a sage do not take the position of king, there will still be wise and virtuous people. I am sure that Confucius will be a great man in the future. After my death, you must be his teacher and learn from him." Soon after Meng Li Zi's death, Meng Yi Zi, in accordance with his father's last words, then became Confucius' earliest disciple. Together with Meng Yizi, Nangong Jing Shu and others from Lu also worshipped Confucius and became his earliest students, who followed him to learn rites.

Meng Yizi asked Confucius for advice on how to practise filial piety. Confucius said, "Do not go against the rites. (When parents are alive, they should be served with rites; when they die, they should be buried with rites and sacrificed with rites.)"

After Confucius had taken on a few students, he often taught them to observe the four teachings: literature, conduct, loyalty and faith. Confucius educated his disciples in four areas. i. Literature, i.e. renowned learning. The study of how to increase one's popularity. Secondly, the study of conduct, which regulates people's behaviour so that there are rules to follow in their words and actions. Third, the study of loyalty, which is the study of cultivation. It is the cultivation of people to do what they should do consciously and voluntarily. Fourthly, the study of faith is the study of knowing and discerning, the study of cultivating one's judgement.

His pupil asked Confucius, "How do you learn, and how do you know so much?"

Confucius said, "If you have studied the past and know the new, you can be a teacher. The meaning is: one who, when revising what he has learned, can gain new knowledge from it, can be a teacher.

He who knows in silence, who learns and never tires of teaching, what is there for me. It means: what is there for me to remember (what I have learned) in silence, to learn without feeling bored, and to teach without knowing weariness?"

His pupil then asked, "How can I forget my sorrows?"

Confucius encouraged his student by saying, "If you are angry and forget to eat, if you are happy and forget to worry, you will not know that old age is approaching. It means: if you study hard and forget to eat, if you are intoxicated with learning, you forget your sorrows and do not know that old age is coming."

The student also asked, "Why do you teach rites?"

Confucius said, "Nature is similar, and habit is distant. When people are first born, they are all good by nature and have similar temperaments. But with the different changes and influences of their respective existences, each person's habits will differ." Therefore, Confucius wanted to teach rites to return people's nature to goodness and to improve their moral cultivation.

The student asks, "How do rites benefit society?"

Confucius said, "The old are at ease, friends are trusted, and the young are cherished. I would like the old to be at ease, friends to trust each other, and the young to be cared for."

Upon hearing this, the students respected their teacher even more.