Confucius' Marriage and Children

Confucius married at the age of nineteen, his wife's surname was 'Qi Guan Shi', and in 532 B.C. Confucius married the daughter of the Song dynasty's Qi Guan Shi. At the age of nineteen, Confucius became famous in the region, and his erudition led many people to come and study with him as a teacher. At the same time, Confucius was recommended by the historian to take up a job as a warehouse official under Ji Pingzi.

Because at that time in China, marriage was either arranged by parents, or required matchmakers, friends, relatives to propose marriage, because Confucius' parents died, all living relatives, only his half-brother and Confucius' relationship is quite okay, so Confucius' half-brother Bernie will take him a chicken, geese and piglets, silk brocade and other bride-price to Qi Guan's girl's house to propose marriage. In her impression: Confucius gave her the intuitive impression of a good-looking man, a very powerful man. And Confucius is erudite and versatile, focusing on etiquette and morality, all of which adds to the image of Confucius in the mind of Qi Guan'er.

Qi Guan'er is also particularly interested in phoenix motifs because she is the reincarnation of the phoenix in the sky. Her favourite thing to do is embroidery, as soon as she has time, she hand embroidered some beautiful patterns, when Confucius's brother to her house for Confucius to propose a marriage, Qi Guan'er from the many embroidery works, selected embroidered with a pair of gold phoenix embroidered piano set sent to Confucius as a token of love.

Phoenix, also known as the "phoenix", the ancient legend of the king of birds. The male is called the 'phoenix' and the female is called the 'phoenix', known as the phoenix in general, and also known as the phoenix, also known as the phoenix, the phoenix, the phoenix and the phoenix. It is often used as a symbol of good fortune and harmony, and has been an important element of Chinese culture since ancient times. The dragon and the phoenix are two of the major totem systems of the Chinese people, and the phoenix is a strong national sentiment. The Chinese have given the phoenix many wonderful characteristics: beautiful, auspicious, kind, serene, virtuous and natural.

The phoenix is a bird of prey in people's minds and a symbol of peace in the world. The ancients believed that when there was peace and prosperity, a phoenix would fly, and that the oracle character for wind and the oracle character for phoenix are the same, meaning that it has the omnipresence and spiritual power of wind; phoenix is the word for emperor, meaning supreme. The phoenix can bring happiness and good fortune to people, therefore, Qi Guan'er hand embroidered the phoenix to Confucius, representing her promise to marry Confucius, of course, also contains her desire for happy love.

When Confucius got the hand-embroidered phoenix from Qi Guan'er, he already understood her wish to marry Confucius. So it was only logical that Confucius married Qi Guan'er.

Confucius' wedding was a traditional red-based wedding. In ancient China the colour red was revered among the royal family, red symbolised privilege and affluence, and could be seen even more on public seals, when red represented more confidence and authority and inviolability. In contrast, the common people generally wore grey, black and blue, and only when they got married did the common people wear red. The Chinese also love to wear red because it is the colour that shines brightest on them, red is a symbol of passion and love, and therefore red has held an irreplaceable and dominant place in the hearts of generations of Chinese people.

On the day of the wedding, Confucius was dressed in a traditional red groom's outfit and Qi Guan'er wore a traditional red bridal gown, which was also topped with a red wedding head cloth. Confucius and Qi Guan'er's friends and relatives all came to the wedding. After Confucius and Qi Guan'er worshipped heaven and earth, they then worshipped their elders and then the couple worshipped each other. After drinking the cup of wine, Confucius and Qi Guan'er were sent to the wedding room dedicated to the newlyweds. The wedding room is red with beds, tents, quilts, decorative paper-cut artwork, etc. Window frames, door frames and other parts that need to be outlined are always decorated in red, symbolising a kind of wealth and good fortune.

Confucius saw the top of the red head cloth Qi Guan Er sitting on the wedding bed and so he approached his new wife, gently lifted the red head cloth, a pair of Dan Feng eyes smiling at him. Qi Guan'er is a gentle, virtuous and dignified beauty, Confucius and Qi Guan'er that night to drink a toast to celebrate their wedding. The loving couple have since begun their married life.

Like Confucius, Qi Guan'er is of Song descent, and the two share a common source of ethnic culture and naturally a little more common language. 533 BC (Lu Zhaogong nine years), 19-year-old Confucius married Qi Guan's wife, a year after the birth of a son in Ji Guan'er, Lu Zhaogong had sent a carp to congratulate, Confucius felt very honoured, so his son was named carp, the word Bo fish. Later, she gave birth to a daughter for Confucius. The two had a child and a daughter, and their married life was quite good.

Confucius attached great importance to marriage, as can be seen from his conversations with Duke Lu Ai. After Confucius had gradually gained fame, Duke of Liao of Lu was particularly fond of asking Confucius for advice on certain issues. One day, Duke Liao of Lu said, "I would like to interject a question: is it not too grand to wear a ceremonial hat and a gown to welcome a bride in person?"

Confucius replied solemnly, "The great marriage is to set up the good deeds of the two families and to carry on the legacy of the ancestors, so how can you say that this is too grand?"

The Duke of Liao said, "I am ignorant, but if I were not ignorant, I would not be able to listen to your high-sounding words. Please give me a detailed account of your views on marriage!"

Confucius then went on to say, "Unless yin and yang intermingle, all things will not be born. A great marriage is to pass on the line of succession to the next generation and to carry on the work of all generations, so why do you say that this is too grand?"

Confucius suddenly thought of using the time spent talking about marriage to recommend some golden ideas for governing the state to Duke Liao of Lu, who was, after all, the ruler of Lu, and it was most important for a ruler to govern the state well, so Confucius went on to say, "In the three previous generations of wise sons of heaven who governed, they must have honoured their wives and sons. A wife is the housewife who provides for her parents during their lifetime, dare she not respect her? The son is the offspring of his parents; dare he not respect them? A gentleman respects everything, but he respects himself most of all. For he himself is the offspring of his parents, so how dare he not respect him? To fail to honour oneself is to harm one's parents. To harm one's parents is to harm one's own root. And if you hurt your root, the branch dies with it. Self, wife and son, these three are also the symbols of the people. If a king can do these three things, then everyone under heaven will be respected. This is how kings used to do it, and if they can do it this way, the state will be well governed."

Confucius also said, "When the day of the wedding comes, to go to meet her in person, wearing a ceremonial hat and dress, is a sign of kissing her. By kissing her, one essentially honours her, so a gentleman takes respect as affection, and to put aside respect is also to put aside affection. Without love there would be no kinship, and without respect there would be no righteousness. Love and respect are probably the fundamental issues of government."

The ruler of the state of Lu, Duke Liao, also asked Confucius, "What is self-respect and self-love?"

Confucius said, "If a ruler can refrain from saying or doing anything wrong, the people will be respectful without waiting for orders. If he does so, he will be able to respect himself. To be able to respect oneself is to bring honour to the face of one's parents."

Confucius' reply pleased the Duke of Liao, and Confucius became more famous.