81. Somewhere In My Memory

Thanks so much for the reviews on the last chapter. I can't believe that 80+ chapters later and ya'll are still sticking with me. Thank you so much.

ooooooooooooooooo

Olivia, Alvin and Hank burst through the emergency room doors and saw Jay pacing wildly, like a caged animal.

They ran up to him, calling his name.

"Jay!"

Olivia threw her arms around him and hugged him.

"Jay, what happened?" Hank asked anxiously as Olivia pulled back and stood facing him.

Jay ran his hands over his tired face, shaking his head.

"I don't…. I don't know. She and I were going to bed and I found her on the floor writhing in pain. She was grasping her stomach and crying, then she just blacked out." Jay's voice cracked hoarsely as he fought desperately to fight the threatening tears.

Alvin sighed and Hank's face paled as he tried to process what he just heard.

Olivia's eyes grew wide, but she didn't say a word.

"I'm going crazy. They won't tell me anything. She was still out when we arrived in the ambulance and they wheeled her through those doors and that was thirty fucking minutes ago." Jay yelled loud enough to ensure the woman at the check-in desk heard him.

Alvin touched his arm lightly.

"Jay, calm down. Yelling at the receptionist is not going to help anything."

Jay's whole body was shaking and it was taking every ounce of strength he had to not fall bonelessly to the floor.

He had never been as scared in his life as he had been when he found Erin on the floor. The image of her clutching her stomach and crying for him to help her was burned into his brain.

When he had taken her in his arms, she was shaking and had clung to him, more fear than he had ever seen in her eyes.

When she lost consciousness, Jay swore his heart had stopped beating in his chest.

He shook her softly begging her to wake up but she didn't. He ran to the phone and called 911, then held her, gently rocking her as tears streamed down his face, until the ambulance arrived.

Sylvie had allowed him to ride with her in the ambulance and they were unable to revive her during the short drive to the hospital.

Now she was behind those stupid double doors and Jay felt like he was going to lose his mind if they didn't come out and tell him something.

Anything.

After arriving at the hospital and telling the doctor everything he knew, Jay called Olivia. He didn't know what else to do. Olivia had told him she would find Hank and come right down.

"Olivia, were you able to get a hold of Burgess? Jay asked, trying to focus on anything besides the vise gripping his chest.

Olivia shook her head in affirmation.

"Yes, I caught them as they were heading out the door to dinner. They're on their way here now. Let me see if I can get some info out of the receptionist. I'll be right back."

"Jay, why don't you sit down for a minute. You look like you're going to pass out any second." Alvin urged as he pulled him down in the chair next to him.

Jay's head fell in his hands, a heavy, shuddering sigh escaping his lips.

"This can't be happening. This can't be happening." Jay kept saying softly, while rocking himself.

Alvin glanced at Hank, who was still standing in the same spot. He had a vacant look on his face. He got up and walked to him.

"Hey, are you alright?" He asked softly.

"No," he said shaking his head gently. "She has to be all right Alvin. She has to be."

Alvin put his arms around him.

"I know, Hank. She will be."

ooooooooooooooooo

Olivia stood at the check-in desk glaring at the woman behind it.

"You don't understand. I have information on her condition that the doctor should know about." Olivia hissed softly.

"I'm sorry miss, I can't let you go back there." The woman insisted.

"Well, tell him to come out here then!" Olivia demanded, her patience waning.

"Miss, the doctor is in the process of examining your friend. I will let him know you need to speak to him and to come out as soon as he finishes."

Olivia scowled and turned away.

"Idiot!" She muttered under her breath.

Olivia had never felt guiltier than she did at that moment.

The torment she saw in Jay's face when they had first arrived left a lump in her throat and ache in her chest.

She watched him a moment, sitting on the chair with his face in his hands.

God, she should tell him. It wasn't her place to tell. Olivia felt helpless and she wanted to scream at the top of her lungs. Erin had made her promise she wouldn't tell, but she was starting to regret that decision.

Olivia thrust her hand in her coat pocket and felt a small item at the bottom. After checking to make sure she wasn't being watched, she snuck around the corner to the payphone.

She pulled out the card she had picked up the day she went to the clinic with Erin and dialed the number. When someone answered, she asked to speak to Dr. Backus.

ooooooooooooooooo

It had been almost two hours since Erin had been wheeled into the emergency room and Jay was still waiting for the fucking doctor to tell him something.

Jay prowled the waiting room incessantly as he badgered the check-in clerk every few minutes.

She had finally told him she would have security remove him if he didn't stop harassing her.

"Well then give me some fucking information about my wife's condition!" He growled, his eyes ablaze.

"I'm sorry sir, someone will be out to talk to you soon." She shrugged her shoulders helplessly in a way that made Jay want to raise his hand to a woman.

What the hell was taking so long?

As if on cue, Kim, Adam and Jackson came flying through the doors. Kim ran up to Jay and grabbed him by the arms.

"Jay! Tell me what happened!" She demanded, out of breath from running

"Kim, they won't tell me anything. They said someone will be out soon" He said softly as his he tried to steady himself.

Kim turned to the clerk.

"Jay. Tell me what happened." She said again.

Olivia, Alvin and Hank walked over to them.

"We had went and got our pictures done this afternoon, and she was fine all day. We were heading to bed and she just...fell...there was blood everywhere. She was in so much pain Kim. She said it was her stomach. Then she passed out. I called the ambulance and that's all I know." Jay spoke without taking a breath.

Olivia knew she needed to tell Jay what Erin had told her a few days ago, but wasn't sure how to bring it up with everyone standing around them.

She took Jay's arm gently.

"Jay can we talk alone for a minute?" She asked but was interrupted when the doctor came out.

"Which one of you is here for a Mrs. Erin Halstead?" The tall man asked as he approached the group huddled around Jay.

"I am. I'm her husband, I'm Jay."

"Hello Mr. Halstead. I'm Dr. Martin. I was the doctor on duty when they brought your wife in. Her regular doctor has since arrived and has taken over her care. She'll be out in a few minutes to speak with you."

"Can you at least tell me if she's okay?"

"I'm sorry, but Dr. Backus wants to be the one to speak with you. I can tell you that she is stable and… Ah, here's Dr. Backus now."

Jay turned to the woman who approached.

"Jay?" She said as she extended her hand.

"Yes, please tell me what's wrong with Erin."

"Erin has secondary postpartum hemorrhage. The shot we gave her apparently wasn't a large enough dose."

Jay shook her head in confusion. In fact everyone looking at the doctor looked confused.

Everyone but Olivia.

Jay's eyes were alive with something indiscernible as his legs began to shake beneath him.

"Excuse me? hemorrhage? Shot? I don't understand what you're saying to me. What's wrong with my wife?"

Dr. Backus's eyes narrowed slightly as is dawned on her that Jay knew nothing of Erin's condition.

"Mr. Halstead, maybe you and I should talk privately." Dr. Backus suggested under the unwavering gaze of six pairs of frightened eyes.

"No. These people are her family. I'm losing my patience Dr. Backus. Tell me what's wrong with Erin."

Dr. Backus sighed resignedly as she glanced at Olivia, who looked away ashamed.

"All right. Erin's been having some bleeding from the birth of the twins. All women after a vaginal birth have bleeding known as lochia, as the uterus sheds its thick lining of tissue from the pregnancy. It's usually light bleeding and resolves itself in a few days. Sometimes, the bleeding is heavy after birth and leads to what we call a post partum hemorrhage. Usually cases of PPH happen after birth, but in rare cases it can happen in the days and even weeks after birth. Erin came in to get a shot a few days ago because she was having some bleeding"

Kim's eyes widened and her hands flew to cover her mouth as she gasped.

Jay eyes slammed shut and he reached out to grab a hold of Kim's arm as all feeling went out of his legs. Her hand instantly flew up and covered his.

Hank's jaw fell open in disbelief as his eyes swept over to glare at Jay.

Alvin's hand grabbed Olivia's shoulder as Olivia's eyes began to water.

The silence that enveloped the room was deafening.

Dr. Backus spoke softly. "Jay, I thought you were aware of her condition. She came here with Olivia."

Jay's eyes opened and focused on the woman in the white jacket in front of him.

Jay felt the vise on his chest tighten even further.

"PPH is life threatening if it is not treated. I told Erin to keep an eye on it and come straight to the ER if she was still having trouble"

Jay felt all the blood drain out of his body. He grabbed Kim's arm again, for fear that his legs would collapse under him.

Jay's eyes glazed over as she tried to process all the information.

"I administered the shot last week and Erin was scheduled to come back to see me on Monday.

However, her uterus ruptured in the meantime. She was hemorrhaging very badly and she was in shock. That's why she lost consciousness."

"How is she now?" Hank asked, struggling to get the words out.

"She's stable. We performed an emergency surgery. Unfortunately, as it turned out, we had to remove her entire right fallopian tube. There was just too much damage. Her left tube wasn't damaged and appears to be healthy and, although her fertility is decreased, she should be able to a healthy pregnancy in the future as long as the left tube was fine. It may take her a little longer to conceive next time, but she's very lucky. She's very lucky that she got here when she did. Ten more minutes and she wouldn't have survived."

Jay's legs did buckle underneath him at that moment. Hank reached out and grabbed him to steady him.

"When can I see her?" Jay asked as Adam placed his arm around him for support.

"She's being prepped for recovery right now and then she'll be moved into intensive care. Once she's settled there, you can see her. It will probably be a few hours though."

"Thank you Dr. Backus," Hank said as he pulled Olivia closer to him.

She nodded her head.

"I'm going to go in and check on her now and I'll let you know when you can see her."

As she turned to go, she looked directly at Olivia.

"Thank you for calling me Olivia. You helped save her life."

Dr. Backus walked back into the emergency room as all eyes turned and pinned Olivia questioningly.

Hank was the first to speak.

"Did you know about this?"

Olivia stood tall knowing that she had no choice but to endure the wrath.

"Yes, I did. She asked me to go with her."

"Why didn't she tell me?" Kim demanded harshly.

"She was planning to, but you guys went away. Look Kim I begged her to tell you guys last week, She refused. There was nothing I could do. It wasn't my secret to tell."

"Her life was in danger Olivia. Those are the times you betray confidences. And you!" Jay turned to face Olivia, his eyes blazing.

Hank just looked at her, dazed. This was too much to process.

ooooooooooooooooo

Jay walked into the intensive care unit of the hospital, not quite knowing how his legs were carrying him. He looked around at all the machinery and his chest tightened.

A woman in her scrubs walked up to him.

"Can I help you?" She asked.

Jay struggled to speak the words.

"Yes, I'm here to see Erin Halstead."

"Are you family?" She asked. "Only family's allowed in the ICU."

Hank, who had heard Jay's voice, came out of Erin's room.

"Yes, Jill. He's family. He's her husband"

"All right Hank. Only a few minutes though. She needs to rest."

Jay tried to smile at the woman who reminded him of Dr. Bailey from Grey's Anatomy as he followed Hank the room where Erin lay.

It was the sound of all the machines that Jay noticed first. He had walked in with his eyes cast down toward the floor and now he was finding it difficult to lift his head. The thought of seeing Erin attached to all those machines again was almost too much for him to bear.

Hank tugged his arm lightly.

"Come on Jay. It's all right."

Jay stepped closer and his gaze swept over Erin's sleeping form.

His breath caught in his throat. She looked so small and fragile. His eyes began to tear up again.

There was a needle in her arm dripping some type of liquid; he imagined antibiotics, into her veins.

There were tubes coming out of her nose and wires poking out of the neck of the white hospital gown covering her, the wires attached to a machine monitoring her vital signs.

Her face was pale and lifeless and her breathing was shallow.

Jay felt his heart lurch at the sight of her as he dropped down into the chair beside the bed.

Hank put a comforting hand on his shoulder.

'I'm going to go get a cup of coffee Jay. Do you want one?"

He shook his head.

"No thanks Hank. Tell me, has she woken up at all?"

"No. The doctor said she probably wouldn't wake up at all tonight, with all the pain killers they've given her."

He nodded as he reached his hand out to clasp hers gently. He threaded his fingers with hers. She felt warm and that relieved him.

"I'll be right back," Hank said as she walked out the door.

Jay sat for a moment, just watching her, memorizing her.

He leaned down and brought her fingers to his lips and kissed them softly. He held her hand against his cheek as he spoke.

"Hey, baby. It's me."

He shook his head lightly.

"Well, that was a stupid thing to say, wasn't it? You probably know my voice by now."

His eyes traveled over her face, admiring her beautiful features. Even as pale as she was and with those tubes sticking out of her nose, she was still the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.

"Erin, I'm so sorry I wasn't there for you. I can only imagine how scared you must have been, about everything." He choked out, tears spilling from his eyes shamelessly.

"God Erin, I was so scared. I didn't know what was wrong with you and it scared me to death."

He huffed out a breath softly and swiped his tears frantically. "But I can't think about that now."

His lips caressed her hand again.

"I almost lost you Er. I can't ever lose you. I need you. Me...and our bab..." Jay's voice shook as he thought about their three children home with a sitter. "...Our babies need you, Erin"

His other hand reached up to caress her warm cheek.

"I love you so much, baby. I love you more than you'll ever know."

Jay closed his eyes and laid his head on the edge of the bed, still clutching Erin's hand in his.

ooooooooooooooooo

Erin struggled against the darkness surrounding her. All she could feel was this dull pain in her abdomen that was unlike anything she had ever experienced.

She could hear noises around her, beeping noises, a soft hum of a machine. A machine?

She could feel something on her face, sticking in her nose and she attempted to raise her hand to swat it away and found she couldn't lift her hand. There was something on top of it.

Erin struggled to open her eyes, blinking a few times to adjust to light. She looked down at her hand and saw the top of Jay's head, his hand firmly holding hers. His cheek was pillowed on top of her hand, and he was snoring softly.

For a minute, she didn't know where she was or what was happening, and she whispered his name through dry lips.

"Jay,"

His head snapped up to look at her and she could see a wave of relief cover his face as he smiled at her.

"Er?, you're awake? Let me get the doctor."

He started to stand but she tightened her grasp on his fingers.

"Jay, wait."

He sat back down and gave her hand a gentle squeeze.

"Er, I really should let the doctor know that you're awake."

She struggled to speak over the sandpaper that somehow miraculously lodged itself in her throat.

"Jay, what happened? Where am I?"

His free hand lifted to softly stroke her cheek and Erin closed her eyes, momentarily reveling in his familiar touch.

"Erin, do you remember collapsing in the hallway?"

She opened her eyes, everything coming back as she looked at him sadly. She nodded and her eyes began to fill.

"Yes." She said, her voice barely above a whisper.

"Your uterus ruptured, sweetheart. You were bleeding internally and you passed out from shock."

"Jay, I'm so sorry," Erin's soft cry escaped her lips as her tears slipped down her checks.

Jay used his thumb to tenderly wipe them away.

"No, Erin," Jay pleaded, his own eyes beginning to water.

"You don't have anything to be sorry for."

She swallowed hard and shook her head gently.

"I do, Jay. I was going to tell-"

Jay placed a gentle finger over her lips to quiet her.

"I know Er. It's okay. We can talk about this later. Okay? Let me get the doctor. She really needs to check you over."

He stood again and this time Erin didn't try to stop him.

They certainly had things to talk about, but now was not the time.

She was just so tired.

But he was here with her and that's all that mattered.

"Please don't leave me Jay?" She begged her eyes slipping closed as he bent his face down to hers. She felt his warm lips brush her forehead gently.

"I'll be right back Er," Jay whispered against her soft skin. "I'm not going anywhere."

ooooooooooooooooo

Sitting on the couch, the silent baby monitor on the cushion beside her, Kim was submerged in the latest book on her ever-growing to-read list. Adam had called nearly an hour ago, saying he was going to be late at the district and she was bored just sitting around the house waiting on him to get home.

The roast in the oven was filling the apartment with its aroma, while the potatoes and carrots lay beside the stove, just waiting to be added. She didn't want to put them in too soon and allow them to turn into mush, so she was just waiting until she knew he was on his way home.

Her laptop was on the other side of her, opened to a blank page that was supposed to be plans for Jackson's first birthday that she was trying to work on in-between everything else that was going on in her life. She couldn't believe her little boy was almost one, and that she was going to have another one joining them soon.

Her mind also drifted to Erin, and why Erin didn't tell her about the bleeding she was suffering through. She didn't understand why Erin had went to Olivia and not come to her. She'd have been there for Erin and in some small way, she was jealous that Olivia suddenly seemed to know more about Erin's life than she did.

Hearing the door open, followed by his footsteps across the tile. Looking up from her spot of the couch, she saw him standing there looking at her.

"Why didn't you call me before you left? I would have made sure supper was ready."

"It's nice to see you too Burgess," Adam commented as he walked over to where she was. Pulling his hand into view, he produced a bouquet of roses as he leaned down to kiss her.

"Why are you buttering me up?"

"I'm not buttering you up. I just happened to bring my beautiful wife flowers."

"For no reason whatsoever?"

"Oh, there's a reason."

"Which is?"

"If you don't know, I'm not telling you."

Before she could continue, the shrill of a baby's cry interrupted their conversation as Kim headed off towards the nursery. Adam was hot on her tail, as he watched her scoop up the baby into her arms.

"Shh…Mommy's here Jack."

Wailing even louder, Jack squirmed in Kim's arms wiggling towards where Adam was standing. Reaching out for his father, Jack wormed his way around in Kim's arms until Adam finally stepped up to them.

"May I?" He asked gesturing to the baby, not wanting to take him away if that's not what Kim wanted.

"Of course, why would you even ask?"

"I don't know, I was just checking."

Bringing Jack in his arms, he looked at his face, and gave him a toothy grin before grabbing some of the coarse hairs of his beard in-between his chubby fingers and yanking.

"Oww…Jack. That hurts Daddy," Adam said as he pried his fingers away from his face. Giggling, he reached out for Kim wanting to switch parents again.

Rubbing his chin, trying to take the sting out of where he had just aggravated his hair he looked back at Kim and smiled.

"He learned that from you I imagine, no one else is that mean to me," He told her with a straight face, yet his eyes were dancing with love.

"I taught him well then, even he knows that Daddy looks better without that mess of hair on his face."

"That's nice Darlin, insult me a little more."

"That is my job Adam."

Seeing that Jack was nearing asleep again, she sat in the rocking chair to make sure he went back to sleep.

"Adam, can you put the potatoes and carrots in the broiler for me?"

"Sure thing Burgess."

Kissing his son's head, he headed towards the kitchen to finish the meal that Kim had started hours ago for him. Opening the oven, he brushed the heat away from his face as he grabbed the potholders to slide out the rack and open the lid. Placing the vegetables around the meat, he closed it back up and headed into the living room to grab the discarded roses, so he could put them in some water.

Padding into the kitchen, Kim saw Adam arranging the roses in a vase for her. Sucking in his bottom lip while working, Kim stood back and stared.

"What are you doing over there staring at me Darlin?"

"Just watching you work."

"So you were checking out my ass."

"I was not, you're crazy."

Kim just rolled her eyes, as Adam stood there shaking his ass for her benefit while working.

"You think you're pretty cute don't you?"

"I don't think I'm cute, I know I'm cute."

"Conceited much?"

"At least I remember what today is, little Miss Smarty Pants."

Kim just looked at him, before the realization dawned on her. The anniversary of the day he proposed. Stepping closer to him, she wrapped her arms around his back, pulling him close to her.

"I remember Adam, I could never forget that day even if the date slipped my mind for a moment."

Turning to hug her, she buried his head in her neck. "I could never forget that day either Burgess…that was the day you changed my life forever."

"You kinda changed mine as well."

"Well, that was the general idea."

Kissing the top of her head, he whispered, "I love you Darlin."

"Love you too."

"So when can we eat?"

"That's all you're ever worried about! But not for awhile, because a certain husband didn't call to let his wife know he was on his way."

"Sorry, I was thinking about picking up flowers, and this…" he said as he walked over towards his briefcase, pulling out a wrapped slender long box.

"Adam, what's that?"

"Open it and you'll find out."

Unwrapping the package in her hands, she was met with a black velvet box that conspicuously looked like it housed jewelry. Opening it up she saw the dainty diamond chain with charms.

"Adam, it's beautiful. You didn't have to do this."

"Look a little closer at them Darlin."

Bringing them closer to her face, she read the tiny inscriptions on them. Each one had one their names on it, and the last one was blank for the new baby that they would have soon.

"How did you know to add a fourth one Adam?"

"I know you better than you think I do Darlin, I knew what you were thinking before you did. So when I ordered it, I told them to leave one blank and if you didn't mention wanting another baby to me before I gave you this, then I would have used it to bring up the subject. But you're already pregnant, so it worked out"

"Thank you Adam, I love it."

"And I love you," He said as he latched the bracelet around her wrist.

ooooooooooooooooo

He had over-reacted, that much he knew. It wasn't intentional and he knew Olivia was just trying to help Erin. But he of course, couldn't see it that way.

Which had led to their first official fight as a married couple.

Hank kept his head bowed, his hands shoved into the pockets of his trousers, as he wove his way through assorted throngs of pedestrians on the sidewalk. The hustle and bustle of these city streets never seemed to diminish, even at this hour, and between the glare of neon signs, the bright glow from storefront windows and the pools of illumination cast from streetlights overhead, Hank still found it necessary every so often to peer up at the sky to make sure it was, in fact, night.

He was later than usual, having stayed after closing to have a couple of beers with Al, something he hadn't done in a very long while. But it was Saturday night, so he figured 'why not'? Besides, he realized as he sat there, staring down at the gloss of shellacked mahogany reflecting the glint of polished brass fixtures that it might be one of the last chances he ever got to do so.

Merging right, out of the foot traffic, he paused for a yellow taxicab to pass before stepping off the curb, picking it up to a jog to cross the pavement as he noticed another taxi swiftly descending upon him. It was quieter, calmer and easier to fade into the shadows on the other side of the street and Hank was in the mood to get a little bit lost.

He soon turned the corner to reach his own neighborhood, where there were actual trees planted curbside, evergreen shrubberies in front of some of the brick-faced buildings, and more importantly a nighttime sky that actually looked the way he remembered it to look.

He pulled keys out of his pocket as he jogged up the cement steps to his front door, careful to close it as quietly as possible

Pausing out of habit to check the mailbox once he was inside the foyer, he reached out for the handrail, resting just the pads of his fingers on its polished wood surface as he trudged up the stairs.

He slipped his key into the lock, and pushed through the door, feeling as if the air actually shifted around him as he stepped inside, the welcoming warmth of the apartment melting away all his tension.

Almost, but not entirely. That sinking sense of doom and dread in his gut still remained, as much as he'd tried to shake it on his walk home. Leave it behind.

He emerged from the short front hall, only the dim blue moonlight spilling through the tall living room windows to light his way. He stopped into the kitchen, placing his keys on the granite countertop before opening the refrigerator door to stare blankly at its contents a while. Finally he grabbed out a carton of milk to take a long swallow directly from it, placing it back inside and wincing a bit as it hit that knot twisted in his stomach, feeling like it curdled on contact.

Continuing on to his bedroom, his eyes gradually adjusted to the darkness as he stopped by his closet to tug his shirttails out of his trousers. He smiled sadly as he undid each button, his gaze slowly drifting over her where she was curled up in ball in the king-sized bed, one hand tucked under a pillow.

His pillow. She was on his side of the bed, which meant she'd probably been trying to wait up for him.

Pulling the comforter back, he slid carefully into the bed next to Olivia, and she almost instinctively shifted away to make more room for him, never seeming to even really stir from her sleep. He settled in, wrapping his arm around her waist from behind as she rolled back to rest against his chest with a drowsy murmur of contentment, the warmth from her body seeping into his very soul.

He lay his head on the pillow to close his eyes with a sigh, nuzzling his nose into the back of her hair, breathing her in along with the clean, familiar scent of their sheets. As his body sank wearily into the cushioned mattress, giving himself over to sleep, he wished for one brief moment he could lose himself in her dreams.

And wished that tomorrow didn't have to come so soon.

Because apologies weren't Hank Voight's strong suit.

Especially when it was to his wife.

ooooooooooooooooo

Shifting in bed, Will rolled over and opened his eyes. He could smell the bacon frying, and it brought a smile to his face. His little brother was all grown up, and for the first time it really hit him hard. He loved their house, it was absolutely beautiful and the family that lived in it was even more precious. He could only hope that one day he would be lucky enough to be a part of a family like Jay and Erin shared.

After today he hoped that he would be on the right track towards getting that for himself. He loved Natalie and Owen and he was finally ready to settle down and make it official.

Dangling his feet over the edge of the bed, he reached over and dug in his bag for his toothbrush so he could take a quick shower before breakfast. Sliding on his discarded jeans from the night before on over his hips, he headed down the hall and into the bathroom.

After his quick shower, Will made his way into the kitchen. He spotted Jay sitting at the table, feeding Everly who was nestled in his lap. While the twins laid in their swings next to him on the table. Setting down beside them, he smiled at the baby, earning a full view of her little white teeth.

"You all sure looked cozy last night," Will said flippantly, throwing a look Jay's way.

"What?"

"Last night in your chair, you guys were all snuggly."

"What can I say? I love being a dad."

Setting the plates in front of the Halstead men, Jay's sister, Rachel, who'd stopped by to babysit , took the baby out of his arms so he could eat. But Everly had other ideas on the matter, stretching her arms out towards her Uncle Will.

"I didn't think she'd come to me?" Will said surprised as Rachel handed him the squirming little girl.

"She loves you Will, just like we do. She just wishes she'd see you more often," Jay hinted with a smile on his face.

"I'll have to work on that, but I'm here now and we're going to make the most of aren't we?" He babbled to the baby in his lap, "Yes we are, do you want to help Uncle Will pick out a ring today?"

Bobbing her head, mimicking his movements it made him smile, "So it's settled, she's coming with us today."

"You wanna go with Daddy and Uncle Will today?"

"Yes" Everly said. It was settled, she was going to spend the day with them ring shopping.

"Are you sure that you want to take her?" Rachel asked."I don't mind watching her. I know Erin's coming home soon, I thought you might want to go see her"

"I can watch her while Jay's visiting Erin." Will explained. "Thanks for letting me stay here last night. It's lonely with Nat and Owen visiting her parents"

"You're welcome" Jay said as he looked at the twins before he looked at his brother.

ooooooooooo

"Do you want to drive?" Jay asked as he looked at his brother.

"Sure." Will said taking the keys. "Plus I hope you've at least improved your driving skills since you've came a father, but I guess Erin doesn't let you drive still, does she?."

"Shut up" Jay said as he strapped Everly into her car seat.

Pulling out of the drive, and peeling out a touch he earned a glare from Jay.

"I am still a cop Will, and you're not supposed to drive like that. Exhibition of speed is a punishable offense."

"Shut up, and live a little Jay."

"I will, when you quit being dangerous."

"Do you honestly think I would ever do something dangerous now that I have my son?"

"No."

"Then what's with the speech?"

"I'm your brother, it's my job."

"Oh, is that so?"

"Yep."

"Since when?"

"Since forever, Will."

"Is that so. You never seemed to care before, so why care now?"

"Neither have you, man"

"Jay, I've always cared about you and I thought that we'd mended our differences over the past year, but maybe I was wrong," Will stated as he laid his head back against the head rest.

Looking over at Will, Jay cussed himself for being such an ass towards him today. They had mended their relationship over the past few months, and Will was one of his best friends for that matter. He hated that Will doubted their relationship over a few words.

"You weren't wrong Will, of course we've mended our relationship. You're one of my best friends, you know that."

Casting a sideways glance over at Jay, Will smiled. They were friends, he knew that they were and he couldn't be happier about it.

"I know we are Jay, sometimes I just forget that you can actually stand me."

"Yeah that is kind of strange isn't it? The first half or so of my life you couldn't stand me either."

"Things change," Will said looking back at him.

"I know, and I couldn't be happier about it."

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