38. The Waiting Game

Because I promised, so here you go! :) Thank you all for your constant feedback!

38. The Waiting Game

No more hospitals before d-day. That was what Erin and Jay had agreed to in November after her collaps and the preterm-labor scare. That they would only come back when she was in labor and when it was time for Emilia to finally enter the world. And now here they sat, in the office of Dr. Fermont, the chief of oncology, waiting for the final test results, waiting for having a conversation with him how things would go on from here.

Hank had been far from being excited when one of his best detectives had asked him to get the morning off after he had just returned from vacation and had been at work for a day but after Jay had told him about his reasons Hank hadn't hesitated for even one second and had granted him to take off the time he needed for resolving all of this. After all it was a noble thing to do and of course the one week long medical leave he would be on after the procedure wasn't a problem as well.

When Dr. Fermont joined them, Jay could feel how Erin squeezed his hand immediately. All the time she has never let go of his hand and this was exactly the support he needed. He couldn't do all of this without her for sure. He watched his doctor anxiously as he sat down across them, maybe still slightly hoping that he simply wasn't a match, that a little detail of his blood wasn't the same as his father's. But life wasn't always a bowl of cherries.

″As expected, you're a match Mr. Halstead,″ Dr. Fermont said, bringing Jay back to reality. Now he had to face it. Now there was no going back, or was there? He felt how Erin even tightened the grasp around his hand and looked at him encouragingly. He let out a deep, long breath before he was even able to say anything, his mind still revolving about the drama he was in now. He was so much his mother, had her looks, her character, had always thought he had nothing from his father. But all the way along they've shared a blood group, shared genetic characteristics that could now save his old man from dying. Life really had a funny way sometimes.

″Alright,″ Jay finally said. ″So what's the plan now?″

″We'll extract a liter to one-and-a-half liters of bone marrow from your iliac crest in a couple of days and then your father will get it via an infusion. You will be admitted to the hospital the evening before the procedure, the following day we'll do it and it takes one-and-a-half hours max and after spending another night at the hospital you can go home and enjoy a week of medical leave without actually being in pain,″ the doctor explained.

″When can you do it?″ Jay asked.

″Your father needs two more sessions of chemotherapy before to give his body the best chance to accept your bone marrow, so doing the procedure on Sunday morning and giving it to your father on Sunday evening should be just fine.″

″Sunday?″ Jay echoed. ″Don't get me wrong but I'd really appreciate it if we could get this done asap because of the baby,″ he said, glancing to Erin's stomach for a second. He didn't want to wait until Sunday. The longer they waited the closer she came to her due date and Sunday meant Erin was just some short one-and-a-half weeks ahead of it.

″I'm afraid Sunday is the earliest we can do it.″

″Well then...-″ Jay started and Erin sensed that he was to reverse himself any second.

″Jay it's okay,″ she assured him. ″It doesn't feel like she will come anytime soon.″

″This feeling can change any day now Er,″ he disagreed and Erin saw the worry and discomfort in his eyes.

″It won't. She will stay inside of me, trust me,″ she said softly. She didn't only say it because this was what he needed to hear, she said it because her maternal instincts have kicked in more than ever and told her that they would have to wait a little while longer. At the moment she even sensed that they would have to play the waiting game beyond the 26th.

Jay's blue eyes met Erin's hazel ones as he stared at her, not knowing what to do, unwilling to believe her, struggling to make a decision that could have such giant consequences. But Erin seemed to be so sure about it and the longer he looked into her eyes, the surer he became that she was actually pretty convinced about the things she'd said. In Wisconsin she'd been right about not having real contractions because she'd been able to assess the situation better, because opposite to him she had maternal instincts which told her what was going on, which showed her to trust her body. So maybe he should simply not question and doubt the things she was saying but rather also trust her body, her maternal instincts. Trust her.

″Okay, so Sunday,″ he finally agreed, hoping that his life wouldn't punch him in his gut once again for doing the right thing.

″Great,″ Dr. Fermont smiled and explained them again in detail what would happen from now on. Since Jay had a quite dangerous job he told them that she should try not to harm himself and not to strain himself too much in the days to come, should maybe rather work the desk than work the streets, and then handed them some papers they could read and he should sign until Saturday evening.

When Jay stepped out of the office later he still didn't know how to feel about it, almost felt like a split personality. He knew it was the right thing to do but this didn't help him to feel better. Now he was in and he would do it, would save the life of the man who had made his childhood and teens a living hell. He didn't do it for him, he did it for his brother, did it because Erin had been right when she'd said he would do this for any other person in this city. Because he would. He would save any life if he had the chance to do it.

″Jay!″ the familar voice of his brother called behind them when they walked to the elevators, their fingers interlocked to give each other some comfort. They stopped and both turned around. Will walked towards them and without saying anything else he wrapped his arms around his brother's back and hugged him tightly.

″Thank you,″ he murmured and when he ended his embrace Jay saw tears welling in his eyes.

″I'm not doing it for him,″ he shrugged.

″I know,″ Will nodded. ″I will never be able to thank you enough for this. And thank you of course,″ he then said to Erin and also hugged her. ″Without you we wouldn't stand here now and I will also never be able to thank you enough for what you did.″

″We're a family Will,″ she said quietly.

″That we are,″ he nodded. ″In case you guys ever need something...you know...″

″Ouh, I think that costs you more than just one time babysitting, right?″ Erin grinned and gave Jay a little wink.

″For sure,″ Jay nodded and smiled faintly.

″I would like nothing better than to babysit my niece,″ he smiled.

″We'll count on that,″ Erin smirked.

″You can,″ Will confirmed. ″Uhm Jay...do you maybe wanna see dad, talk with him in personal?″

″No,″ he answered immediately and shook his head. ″Just because I'm saving his life doesn't mean it will change anything about our relationship. I'll do this but I still don't want to have any contact with him,″ he said. ″For now.″

″Okay,″ Will answered, accepting his brother's decision and his answer was at least not a complete refusal and there was hope that he would talk with him when the time was right for him. ″How about dinner on Friday?″

″Sounds like a good idea,″ Jay agreed. ″But no talk about him.″

″Sure. There's still the story about you guys being snowed in I don't know yet,″ he winked before they said goodbye. Before Jay went back to work to take his mind off with working their current case and before Erin went grocery shopping to stock up their empty fridge and to also take her mind off while filling her cart with all the things they needed.

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

The days that led to Sunday seemed to be endlessly long, even for Jay although he had more than enough work to do in the bullpen. For Erin it was even worse as she was bored beyond limits and spent all day with thinking about the things that were about to happen. She cleaned the apartment, laundered the rest of Emilia's newborn clothes and put them in the drawer, cooked dinner so they could eat in the evening when Jay returned from work, tried to take her mind off by zapping through the channels and following the things that flickered on the screen more or less interested. But as she didn't have to clean the apartment every day, didn't have to go grocery shopping every day and didn't have to do their laundry every day, she started to spend the mornings in the bullpen again, officially of course not for work but only for visiting her colleagues, bringing them breakfast or lunch, but ended up with helping them with their cases anyway. She didn't want to be alone at home and it was definitely not too strenuous for her to sit on her chair in the bullpen and listen to her colleagues, interposing her thoughts from time to time. Of course she didn't interrogate suspects anymore but just being in the bullpen for some hours, seeing something else than the walls of their apartment and spending time with the people she liked and loved, helped her to take her mind off, helped her to feel better. And Jay was also a lot calmer when she was with them and he could see that she was doing fine instead of looking at his phone every five minutes, waiting for the one call.

After what felt like the longest five days in history it was finally Saturday evening and Erin brought Jay to Chicago Med. One of the nurses showed him his room and brought him some light food. Dressed in sweatpants and a black shirt with a v-neck Jay sat on the edge of the bed and ate his dinner. It felt odd being back here, especially since he was completely healthy. There was something about hospitals he has never liked. The smell, the food, the nurses who walked in and out of the rooms every hour and kept their patients from sleeping, all the meds, the needles, the doctors with their concerned glances all the time, knowing how many sick people were here, how many of them died here every day. He's never understood how his brother could do this day in day out but he was also impressed by it as working as a doctor really required a lot.

″You'll be home in 48 hours, remember that,″ Erin, who sat right next to him, said when she saw how he picked at his food. He assumed she was most likely also saying this for herself.

″I know,″ he sighed but couldn't eat anything anyway. Erin could understand him because she wasn't hungry at all either and would most likely throw up if she had to eat something.

″I try to see the positive side of it: from Monday on we can drive us nuts 24/7 for a week out of boredom,″ she said and chuckled slightly.

″I've already made plans, no worries,″ he winked.

″Did you?″ she asked, raising her eyebrows. ″Will you tell me about them?″

″We can go to the zoo, we can discover some new parks, we can go to the Aquarium and the Art Gallery, we can look for places for the wedding, we can look for destinations for our honeymoon,″ he smirked mischievously.

″I especially like your last suggestion,″ she murmured and placed a soft kiss on his lips.

″Uh-huh,″ he chuckled. ″And next Saturday we'll go to the Bulls game, Sunday to the Blackhawks.″

″That's a lot of sports in one weekend,″ she stated and grimaced a little. She loved going to the games but two in two days was maybe a bit too much for her liking. On the other hand it was distraction, so maybe it wasn't the worst idea to attend them both.

″We have to do it as long as we still can,″ he grinned, rubbing her belly with his hand, earning some kicks instantly.

″Your brother just offered to be our babysitter whenever we need him, so I doubt these will be our last games for the next ten years,″ Erin chuckled.

″You got a point there,″ he smirked. ″You want me to give the tickets to Atwater and Ruzek?″

″Naaah, let's go there, it'll be fun,″ she winked.

″Good,″ Jay nodded. ″Because they already volunteered that I can willingly give them the tickets in case we have a date with the delivery room that day. I even think they hope for it somehow, so I really don't wanna give them the tickets,″ he added laughingly.

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

After staying with Jay for two more hours where they kept on to distract each other, Erin left him reluctantly around 9 in the evening. She wanted to come back early on the following morning, before they would bring him to surgery but it still was quite hard for her to say goodbye and Jay didn't want to let her go as well.

Sitting in her car on her drive home, she realized that she hasn't spent a single night away from him since he'd had his accident. And she had to admit, she didn't feel comfortable with the thought of spending this night all alone in their apartment, knew she wouldn't be able to sleep there tonight. But there was this one other place, where she maybe couldn't sleep as well, but would at least feel a little more comfortable tonight, the place that once had been her home and still felt like home whenever she was there.

She tossed some clothes into a small bag as soon as she was back at home and then drove to Hank's house, letting out a deep breath when she saw the light flickering in the living room. She grabbed her bag, stepped out of her car into the cold night and walked straight to the big, wooden front door, knocking on it loudly instead of using her key and scaring Hank to death. It took a while until she heard noises in the hall and she sensed he was once again lurking around with his gun in his hands.

″Hank put the gun down,″ she said and literally a second later he opened the door.

″What are you doing here, kid?″ he asked, a look of confusion and curiosity on his face.

″I just brought Jay to the hospital and I didn't want to spend the night alone...″ she said. ″Can I maybe stay here tonight?″ she asked shyly and her cheeks blushed a little. She knew her old room was Daniel's room now but Justin's old room was a cozy guestroom with a giant bed that just waited for someone to sleep in it.

″I hope you know that the answer would always be yes, Erin,″ Hank smiled.

″Thank you,″ Erin also smiled and followed him into the house, tossed all her stuff in the hall and joined him in the living room.

″Have you already had dinner?″ he asked.

″I'm not hungry.″

″Erin you need to eat something, you will soon need all your power and I'm sure your baby is hungry. I have some leftovers from dinner, nothing spectecular, just pasta,what do you say?″

″Can't say no to your pasta, right?″ she smiled faintly.

″That would break my heart,″ he nodded and a raspy chuckle escaped from his lips.

While Erin sat down on the dining table, Hank heated her dinner up for her and then brought her a plate full of pasta and a glass of water. They even managed to have a conversation where the words bone marrow and all the stuff related to it weren't mentioned but instead Erin told Hank more about the days in Wisconsin as she hasn't had the opportunity until yet and he only knew the few things they had told all of their colleagues the other day when they had also told them about their engagement.

After finishing to eat Hank told her that she looked beyond tired and exhausted and that she should try to catch some sleep. She didn't feel too bad, just mentally exhausted and strained but she agreed and went upstairs, took a long, hot shower, slipped into her pajamas and dried her hair a little before lying down in the cozy bed all alone. It was while trading some texts with Jay, who couldn't sleep as well, and watching the rerun of a casting show on TV when she felt the familar pain of Wisconsin making a comeback. Hoping that it wasn't a precursor, an indication of upcoming real labor this time either but was just false labor again because her daughter slowly but steady dropped into the right position for her imminent birth, Erin tried to stay calm by breathing through it in a steady rhythm.

Surprisingly, concentrating on her breathing not only helped her to stay calm and the false labor to fade but also lulled her into a much needed sleep when her eyes simply fell shut in between inhaling and exhaling deeply.

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

When Erin walked into the kitchen on the following morning she felt surprisingly well rested. Given all the current circumstances sleeping from midnight to 4am in the morning wasn't that bad but after waking up shortly after 4am because she had to pee, she hasn't been able to go back to sleep as suddenly all the nervousness has made a comeback. So she'd laid awake, had told herself over and over again that it was just a really small, uncomplicated procedure and that there was no reason to be extraordinary nervous, had turned around from one side to the other impatiently which was quite some work with the current size of her stomach and had then somewhen settled on her back as Emilia preferred once again to always kick and box her into the side she laid on. So the two hours until she had heard Hank walking down the stairs had consisted of rubbing her stomach, of boxing back sometimes, of watching her baby's crazy movement that made her wonder whether their daughter would maybe try to box and kick her way out into this world.

″Why are you up already?″ Hank asked her when she joined him in the kitchen and sat down on the small table there. He was already occupied with making pancakes. Just for her. She hasn't had them in forever and knowing that he made some to make her feel better was one of the best feelings in the world, made her heart pound and warm.

″Wild child doesn't think I need that much sleep,″ she sighed.

″Not long now Erin,″ he said and gave her an encouraging smile before filling more batter into the pan.

″Yeah, I know. I wanted to get up early today anyway so I can see Jay before the surgery, but 4am wasn't the plan,″ she yawned. ″When Jay's back home tomorrow evening I hope this whole waiting game comes to an end soon. Like really soon. Tuesday would be great, Wednesday would also be okay, Thursday would still be acceptable, that would make 39 weeks. I'm so done being pregnant, you can't imagine.″

″Oh, I can. Camille started complaining like this in week 34, so you're pretty good,″ he smirked.

″It's not so much about complaining, I'm happy she's still in there and although it's quite hard I try to enjoy it. I just can't wait to sleep like a normal human being again, comfortably and without having her feet in my ribs and in my sides. I can't wait for the day I don't have to pay the toilet a visit every two hours anymore. I can't wait to sit on a chair again without having the feeling that everything inside of me is squished together. I can't wait to wear normal clothes again. And of course I can't wait to meet her,″ she smiled. ″But I have a feeling our little lady won't do me the favor and come even a day early. She will rather come late, I'm calling it,″ she sighed with a laughter, not knowing how right she was about her suspicion.

″Even if she would come late, Erin, it's just a sign of how well she feels inside of your belly and that being said, it's a proof of what a hell of a job you're doing there,″ he smiled and Erin felt her cheeks blush a little. ″You've come a long road since the beginning of your pregnancy.″

″Mhm,″ she only nodded in response. Thinking back to the beginning of her pregnancy, to how she almost decided to kill her own child that she now already loved with all her heart, was something that sent chills down her spine, that forced her swallow hardly every time she thought about it.

″When is Jay's procedure?″ Hank changed the topic and she startled from her thoughts.

″It's scheduled for 10, so it should be done by 11 to 11.30,″ she answered, got up and put some plates out of the cupboard to set the table.

″Do you want me to come with you?″

″Would you...?″ she asked perplexedly.

″I don't wanna let you wait there alone to be honest and time always moves faster when you have some company. But if you rather want to be for yourself I also accept that of course.″

″No...uhm...I'd appreciate it when you come with me. A lot,″ she smiled, feeling a little bit of her nervousness fade as she now knew she wouldn't have to watch the seconds ticking down on the clock for 90 minutes.

Hank and Erin enjoyed a delicious breakfast together and after she's had the feeling that her stomach would riot any second after she'd waken up earlier, she was surprised that she was now able to eat four pancakes although she'd thought that she wouldn't be able to eat anything at all. But Hank's pancakes always worked wonders and so she felt quite good when they later arrived at Chicago Med. She tried to not worry too much but did her best to stay as positive as possible. The doctors here made such small procedures every day, it was routine and everything would turn out just fine.

″Hey babe,″ she smiled when she walked into Jay's room while Hank was waiting outside. He was already wearing his gown for the surgery and the needle for the IV was already in his arm as well.

″Hey beautiful,″ he smiled back and enjoyed the kiss she placed on his lips. ″How are you doing?″ he asked, cupping her cheek with his hand and stroking it softly with his thumb.

″I'm good, what about you?″

″Since you're here I'm good, too,″ he smiled. ″What about wild child?″

″Well, wild child is...wild,″ she laughed.

″So nothing new there, huh?″ he grinned.

″Nope,″ she smirked and snuggled closer to his side, enjoying almost an hour of undisturbed closeness that helped to take their nervousness away. At least a little. Jay told Erin about his mostly sleepless night and how he had spent almost the whole night with watching TV. He wasn't nervous because of the surgery, maybe a little, but not too much. It was because he still feared that she could go into labor while he was in the OR, saving his old man's life and missing the arrival of the life they'd created. And although he had told himself over and over again that it was highly unlikely that a first-time-mom would give birth in three hours or less and that he therefore wouldn't miss the birth even if she went into labor while he was in the OR, he didn't feel comfortable with this situation. He wanted to be there, every step of the way, from the first contractions to the last, holding her hand and supporting her just as he had promised it.

But he didn't tell Erin about all of this, she was nervous enough already, he knew it and there was no need depress her with all the things that had kept him awake last night.

So Erin told Jay about spending the night at Hank's and even teased him that she has brought some pancakes for him which he could eat after the surgery. Jay complained how mean it was to mention this now, as he was already starving because he had to be empty, but she kept on teasing him that he could call himself lucky if she wouldn't eat all the pancakes until he would be able to eat them. It was exactly the kind of banter their relationship was built on, the kind of banter they needed on a morning like this, the kind of banter that let them forget the world around them for a moment.

All of this found quite a sudden end when two nurses came in and told them that it was time. They shoved Jay's bed out of the room and Erin accompanied them until the doors of the OR, hugged him tightly, gave him another long kiss and told him that she loved him and of course he did the same. At this point they were also joined by Will and he promised Erin that he would keep an eye on everything. The doors closed and Jay disappeared behind them and while Erin walked back to the waiting area, the anesthetist injected the narcosis into Jay's IV and told him to count to ten. Reaching three everything around him turned black.

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

Hank sat in the waiting area and saw Erin walking towards him. Gone was the woman who had played strong earlier this morning, now she was a picture of a misery and when she came closer he saw tears running down her face. His heart immediately dropped to his knees, fearing that once again something has happened she didn't deserve.

″What's up?″ he asked and got up from his chair, ready to hold her tight in case she needed it.

″Nothing,″ she shrugged and wiped her tears away with her hand. ″Just me hyperventilating under the influence of these bloody hormones.″

″Come here, kiddo,″ Hank said softly and gave her a long hug before the both of them sat down, Erin's head resting on his shoulder.

″It's so stupid,″ she said with a cracky voice, inhaling deeply.

″It's not Erin. It's a normal reaction,″ he assured her.

″This is definitely not a normal reaction. Not for me. It's a small procedure with almost no risks and I KNOW he will be fine but I can't keep myself together anyway.″

″Don't be so hard with yourself. You love this guy, so why should it be a bad thing showing emotions regarding him?″ Hank asked.

″I don't know,″ she answered quietly. ″I guess it just brought back too many memories from when I thought I'm losing him forever.″

″He will be back driving you nuts tomorrow when he plays super sick and wants you to take care of him 24/7,″ Hank grinned and Erin lifted her head from his shoulder and looked at him with teary eyes.

″He would never do that. At least not at the moment. He rather wants to take care of me 24/7,″ she grinned.

″Good for him. Otherwise a serious talk between me and him would've been necessary.″

″I can imagine that,″ Erin chuckled before they fell into a comfortable silence for a couple of minutes. But only as long as Hank sensed it was okay for Erin to say nothing at all. When he saw how she started to rub her palms nervously and how she couldn't take her gaze off the clock across them, he decided that it was better to keep her occupied somehow.

″Olive is pregnant again,″ he said out of the blue.

″What?″ Erin asked and a bright smile appeared on her face.

″They told me on Christmas before you and Jay arrived. I'm actually not supposed to tell anyone as it's still early but I guess you can keep a secret and act surprised when Justin tells you,″ he smiled.

″Of course,″ Erin laughed. ″This is incredible. And fast. When is the baby due?″

″Mid-July. They wanted them to be close in age so they can grow up together. And they want to move back to Chicago before the baby will be born.″

″Yeah, that's what Justin told me, too. But he forgot to mention the little detail about the baby,″ she laughed and shook her head. ″Your house will be full of little kids this summer, huh?″

″Looks like, yeah,″ he grinned and Erin saw the anticipation for barbecues and garden parties and kids in sandboxes and kiddie pools in his face.

They kept on talking about this for a little longer and Erin had some struggles to not reveal her daughter's name in front of Hank. When she talked with Jay about her they both almost always talked about her as Emilia or Emmy but for everyone else her name was supposed to stay a secret until they could introduce their daughter to their family and friends in person.

Somewhen in between these talks, between Hank trying to keep Erin distracted and Erin being thankful for exactly this distraction, Dr. Fermont approached them without them even recognizing it at first.

″Ms Lindsay?″ he asked and only now she saw the tall doctor with the fair gray hair and the glasses coming closer. She felt her heart drop a little but reminded herself to stay cool. Everything was fine, she knew it.

″Are you done already?″ she asked, taking a look at the clock. It's just been a little more than an hour.

″Yes,″ he confirmed smilingly. ″We have one-and-a-half liters of best bone marrow and everything went as perfect as could be expected.″

This statement was enough to take the load off her mind. All of it. They had overcome another drama without further damage and from now on they could fully concentrate on Emilia's imminent birth and on their life as a family. She felt so relieved in this moment, she had to keep herself together from letting happy tears fall from her eyes.

″Can I see him?″ she asked and swallowed her emotions down.

″He's in recovery and not awake yet but you can see him and be there when he wakes up if you want.″ Of course she wanted, was this even a question?

″Yes, please,″ she pleaded.

″Alright, follow me.″

She got up and so did Hank. He told her that he would go home now, would give them their well-deserved alone-time, would maybe come back in the evening with the rest of the unit. She hugged him tightly for goodbye. It was more than just a hug. It was a thank you for everything he's done for her in the last 24 hours, for simply being there, for going through this with her, for taking care that she didn't have to face this alone, for being the person she needed so much in her life, her father.

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

Jay's eyes were still closed when she sat down in the chair right next to his bed in recovery. He looked so peaceful, completely different than the last time after his surgery, and other than the IV in his arm that supplied his body with some liquids and vitamins there were absolutely no tubes or anything else, not even a heart monitor, no additional oxydgen which she assumed was the best sign possible. She took his hand in hers, stroked it softly and then brought it up to her face to place a kiss on the back of his hand.

She didn't know how long she's been sitting there, maybe around half an hour, waiting patiently for him to wake up, when his bright blue eyes fluttered open and when he checked his surroundings a little confused in the beginning.

″Hey babe,″ she said and squeezed his hand.

″Erin,″ he whispered and smile flashed across his face as he recognized this raspy voice immediately. He blinked some times to get a clearer vision and slowly but steady the blurry picture faded and he saw the beautiful face of his fiancée smiling at him happily. ″How long was I out?″

″Just two hours,″ she told him. ″Everything went in the best possible way. Do you have any pain? Feel nauseous?″

″No, nothing,″ he answered and shook his head. ″Just feeling a bit high.″

″That will fade,″ Erin winked, changed her position from the chair to the edge of his bed, leaned in, brushed her finger over his lips and then placed a gentle kiss on them.

″How do you feel, Er? Everything alright?″

″Yeah...yeah...now everything is perfect,″ she smiled and couldn't hold back to kiss him again.

Jay was transfered to his room half an hour later, slept a little more and was already allowed to get up by himself and to change into his comfy clothes in the afternoon. As he was allowed to eat as well, Erin gave him Hank's pancakes and although it wasn't easy for him to admit, Hank Voight's pancakes were a complete different level than the ones he always made and for sure the best he's eaten yet.

Will checked by some times during the afternoon and they spent the time until all their friends came to visit Jay in the evening with playing some rounds of Uno. When all of their favorite colleagues from the 21st, including Platt and even Roman, came in the evening, the room ran a little out of space. They brought Chinese takeout and some sodas, so all of this was more a casual evening of a group of friends than a sick bed visit. If it wasn't a hospital they could've had a lot more fun this evening of course but this was still the best way possible to end the day.

Erin went home again with Hank, spent another night in the guest room of his house. She didn't even know why but she had the feeling that it was the right thing, sensed that she would sleep better in an unfamilar bed than in her own where she was used to have Jay next to her.

Of course she didn't know whether she would've slept just as good in her own bed but on Monday morning she felt better than all the mornings of the previous week ever since she'd known that Jay was undergoing surgery. Maybe it also had to do with the fact that it was over now, that she didn't have to worry anymore, didn't have to be nervous anymore, that she was just about to take her hero home later and could spend a week at home with him.

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

Jay was already waiting anxiously when Erin finally walked into his room. He had signed the discharge papers first thing in the morning, even before breakfast, and he couldn't wait to get out of here as fast as possible.

As the end of Erin's pregnancy was near now, she had appointments with Dr. Hanson once a week and so she had one today. Jay was happy that he, opposite to last week, could be with Erin today and fully enjoyed this first advantage of his medical leave as he listened to the steady heartbeat of their daughter during the CTG and later saw their almost full-term baby on the screen when Dr. Hanson made an ultrasound. Dr. Hanson took Erin's hopes that their baby would be born soon when she told her afterwards that there were still absolutely no indications that she would go into labor soon. Talking from her experience she even said that it looked like it would be at least the 26th, maybe even later, which basically, and much to Erin's disfavor, confirmed the feeling she's had for a while now.

Coming home a little later in the morning, they made themselves comfy in their bed, their backs resting against a couple of big pillows. Jay placed the laptop in his lap and Erin rested her head on his shoulder when they started to look for destinations for their honeymoon. Not that they already wanted to book something, they didn't even have a date for the wedding yet, but just scrolling through all these sites with pictures of white beaches and clear, turquoise water, of breakfast buffets in 5* hotels and rooms with tester beds was enough to let them start dreaming. And dreaming it was indeed, because destinations like the Fiji Islands, Mauritius or the Maldives were simply out of any reachability as it was way too expensive and spending 19, 33 or 37 hours traveling only to get there was for sure nothing to aim.

″So Hawaii is a destination that comes into question,″ Erin summarized in the end. ″Or the Bahamas.″

″I still like the Fiji Islands better,″ Jay smirked.

″You a Rockefeller now?″ she laughed.

″Hawaii is not that much cheaper. I mean, I would like to see my then-wife in a little hula skirt though,″ he said and a mischievous grin rushed over his face.

″Keep on dreaming,″ she answered all dry. ″Because this is definitely not going to happen.″

″We'll see,″ Jay smirked. ″I'm sure they also have these little hula skirts on the Fiji Islands, so that shouldn't be a problem,″ he kept on teasing her.

″Jay, Fiji is a 19 plus hours trip, Hawaii is around eleven to twelve which is already long enough with a baby, don't you think? And the Bahamas are only aroud six hours away, so that would be the best option maybe.″

″Waaaaait,″ he said, furrowing a brow by these words. ″You want to take her with us?″

″Uhm, sure, what do you think?″ she asked and now she was the one who looked at him like he has lost his mind. ″Leaving her here like, mommy and daddy will come back next week but we're sure you'll manage your life?″ she chuckled.

″Of course not like this. But it's our honeymoon, Er.″

″Yeah and we will be parents then,″ she winked. ″Our life will be completely different from now on.″

″I know that, believe me. But a honeymoon with a baby is not the same.″

″You scared that we wouldn't be able to play scrabble as often or...?″ she joked and had to laugh a little when he grimaced.

″That's not the reason,″ he answered and shook his head. ″I just think honeymoon is something we should enjoy as a couple. Just the two of us. It's not like that we go for two weeks. We can leave her with Hank for a week, then we can come back and still spend a week at the cabin with her. How about that?″

″I don't know,″ Erin shrugged. Of course she wanted to go on honeymoon just with him but this wasn't about just them anymore. There was now this little human being joining them soon and they had to consider all the consequences of their decisions for her as well. And she didn't know whether she could leave her then 6-months old baby alone for a week while she was a 19-hours flight trip away.

″Let's decide this in a couple of weeks, okay?″ she asked. They wanted to go to a beautiful beach or maybe to Europe, something like Paris, and they now knew their possibilities, had of course also checked other destinations than just Hawaii, the Bahamas and Fiji and Paris, places in South America and all over Europe and also Canada where they could go, but they didn't want to rush anything and they still had time.

″Of course,″ Jay smiled and kissed her temple. ″I guess I'll dream about you in a little hula skirt for the next six months until I actually see you in one,″ he chuckled afterwards.

″Sounds like a nice dream and you can even dream about this for the rest of your life, babe, isn't it awesome?″ she teased him, biting her lower lip playfully and grinning at him innocently. She had a way to drive him nuts for sure.

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

The week of Jay's medical leave passed fast. One day they went to the zoo although they had only been there with Noah a couple of weeks ago. But Erin liked the thought of walking around all day as she'd read that walking could help to encourage and induce labor, so this would maybe give their baby a push to finally hit the road.

Instead of going into labor the waiting game continued as Emilia had a mind of her own and didn't even think about doing them the favor to enter this world while Jay was on medical leave and Jay always teased Erin that their daughter had her stubbornness definitely from her, already showing how much of Erin's character she had. Other than that her back pain increased a little and that she had false labor and Braxton Hicks again, everything stayed the same.

So they tried to enjoy their last days two in two, took it as a bonus they've been given to have some more alone-time, strolled through parks, still hoping that Erin could walk their baby out somehow, went to the Aquarium and other museums but also spend a lot of time with just relaxing on the couch and watching movies or Netflix all day long.

As they had planned, they went to the Bulls and Blackhawks game on the weekend and went out for dinner in some nice little restaurants afterwards, enjoying these date nights as they didn't know when would be the next time they could simply go out in the evening, stroll through the city and go into a restaurant that looked nice and had some delicious meals on its menu.

The only thing they didn't do during all this time was visiting Jay's father but after all Jay had asked his brother how he was doing which was a sign that he cared about him a little more although he was still not ready to face him. Will told them that things looked good so far, that it looked like his body wouldn't reject the bone marrow but that it was still too early to tell that he was out of the woods as he was in a critical phase now and would stay in it for at least four more weeks because every little cold could kill him. When everything was still good in four weeks it was safe to say that he would make a full recovery.

Monday morning arrived and Jay had to go back to work which was something he didn't like so much because it meant he had to leave Erin alone. But when she didn't have to do anything in their apartment, didn't have to go grocery shopping or didn't have an appointment at Med, where she had to go in a 3-day-rhythm now, she drove straight to the 21st district around noon, brought their colleagues lunch and spent the afternoon in the bullpen, the bag for the hospital being always in her car now. On one hand Jay wanted Erin to rest and therefore stay at home but on the other hand he felt a whole lot better when she was in the bullpen with them. Leaving her in the morning was the hardest thing for him and he was a wreck inwardly, his nervousness reaching a dangerous level. He tried his best not to show this in front of his team members but of course they all saw him looking at his phone every two minutes and even without this they knew how he felt, could emphasize with him and tried their best to distract him, to calm him down and of course sometimes also teased him about it.

The 26th of January came and passed without anything special happening that day. Erin had to go to Med again in the morning and now had to come in every two days as she was basically overdue. Afterwards she went back to the bullpen and in the evening she and Jay went to the theater to get some distraction from their frustration and tried to forget about the fact that today should've been the day they've waited for so long.

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

Antonio celebrated his birthday in Molly's on Saturday evening and although he had told Erin that he understood it if she wouldn't come, she came. She was sick and tired of this whole waiting game and she rather spent the evening with her friends at Molly's, regardless that she was two days past her due date, than in their apartment, waiting for something to happen when she still didn't have the feeling that this something would happen soon. Of course everyone of the firefighters and nurses and doctors she didn't have that much contact with usually asked her this evening how she felt and how far along she was and when she answered she was two days late all casual, everyone looked at her with wide eyes and asked her why she was here then. And every time she explained them that there was nothing she hated more than waiting so she was thankful for all the distraction she could get.

Erin and Jay sat next to each other on one of the tables with the benches, across Kevin and Adam, drinking water and beer and talking nonsense once again, when Mouse joined them, a little shy as always.

″Uhm, do you have a minute,″ he asked and looked to Erin and Jay.

″Sure,″ Jay nodded and got up.

″I meant Erin,″ Mouse admitted and laughed nervously.

″Ouh,″ Jay also laughed. ″You now pinch my best friend?″ he grinned to Erin and raised his eyebrows.

″Looks like, huh?″ she chuckled. ″Try not to be too jealous,″ she winked when she walked past him and followed Mouse who unfortunately went outside into the dark night.

It wasn't too cold for end of January but of course Erin shivered after only two seconds and hoped that they wouldn't stay here for too long. Getting sick was the last thing she needed right now.

″Oh sorry, should've told you we go outside as it's so much quieter here,″ Mouse said and instead of slipping into the jacket he was holding in his hand, he gave it to Erin, placed it around her shoulders.

″Better?″ he asked.

″A lot, thank you,″ she smiled at the young tech-whiz. ″So, what's up?″ she asked. Given the fact that he wanted to talk with her alone, outside, she was pretty sure to know what was up.

″I need your advice on something,″ he said.

″Go ahead,″ Erin winked and no matter that it was dark, she saw how his cheeks blushed.

″So...uhm...Sarah and I have a date tomorrow,″ he started and the cutest little smile surrounded his lips. ″But I have no idea where to go and I thought...maybe you can give me a tip? I mean, where did Jay take you for your first date? Where did you have your first date?″

″In Jay's bedroom,″ Erin answered all dry and without beating around the bush.

″Ouh...″ Mouse stammered by her unexpected honesty.

″Mouse, Jay and I were friends before for quite some time and there was always this...magic and attraction between us. It was normal for us to go to bars together in the evening, so we completely skipped that classical part of having dates,″ she chuckled slightly. The only thing one could consider a date before she had appeared in front of his apartment after a shitty day at the task force was the evening of her high school reunion and this was long before something really happened between them.

″Okay,″ he nodded and still tried to process this information. ″But do you have any ideas where we could go? I thought about the Art Gallery or a museum but maybe she finds it boring and...″

″Mouse,″ Erin said and lay her hand on his arm. ″Does she like art? History?″

″Yeah, she does. That's at least what she told me,″ he shrugged.

″Then I think the Art Gallery is a perfect idea,″ Erin smiled.

″Yeah?″ he asked and his face lighted up.

″Uh-huh,″ she nodded. ″And afterwards you should take her to one of these nice, little restaurants in the Loop.″

″Okay...I don't have to wear a suit, do I?″

″That would be a little overdressed I guess,″ she grinned. ″Wear something casual, clothes you like and just be you, that's it Mouse.″

″Alright,″ he said and took a deep breath. ″Something casual,″ he repeated her words quietly. ″What about flowers?″

″Well, she would have to take them with her into the Art Gallery then...but bringing her a single rose should be just fine,″ she said and Mouse nodded in response. She could see how he already imagined the following day in his head. ″Will you pick her up?″

″Uhm...no, we will meet somewhere.″

″Mouse, go and pick her up,″ Erin ordered and had to suppress a slight chuckle this time as it was just so cute how helpless he was.

″Okay, I will pick her up. Anything else?″

″Don't forget to breathe and enjoy it,″ Erin grinned. ″It's going to be great, Mouse.″

″I hope so,″ he answered and smiled faintly. ″Thank you Erin.″

″No worries,″ she winked.

″And Erin...can this stay between us?″

″I promise,″ she said all serious and linked arms with him while walking back into the bar. Of course Jay was quite curious what his fiancée and his best fried had talked about outside but no matter how hard he tried to get the two of them talking, they kept their little secret.

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

It was long after midnight when they lay finally under the covers in their bed that night but these days none of them was able to sleep. So they enjoyed some late night cuddles while Jay was drawing circles onto her stomach, while he tickled her belly softly, while he told their daughter that she should come out now as they preferred to end the waiting game at this point. Jay knew Erin was exhausted, couldn't sleep at night, was tired of waiting, was done being pregnant and just wanted it to be over now as her back started aching more and more. He also knew she gave her best to stay positive about it but she was snapping at him more often again and wasn't in the best mood in general. He could understand her, he also wanted it to happen by now, didn't want to wait any longer but at the moment he could do nothing more than support her in the best way possible and try to tell her that the end was in sight and of course giving her back some well-deserved massages three times a day.

When their eyes somewhen fell shut because regardless their nervousness they were so tired that they couldn't keep them open anymore, they didn't know how soon the waiting game would be over...

Thanks for reading! Please leave a review and tell me what you think :) Already going a little bit ahead here, I'd love to know what you think about their honeymoon: alone or with Emilia? And where should they go?

Next chapter is the one you've been waiting for... ;)